This was going fast. Too fast.
As our breathing subsided, Jaxson trailed his nose along mine. “A thousand kisses from you a day wouldn’t be enough.”
I blushed at his words. “They’re yours. Anytime.”
But . . . we still needed to talk.
As if he read my mind, Jaxson grabbed my hand and led me to the couch. Jaxson asked, “What did you want to talk about earlier outside?”
Nervously, I tucked my escaped hair behind my ear. “My past. The threats. I can’t start something with anyone if they don’t know everything.”
Jaxson took a deep breath. “I know about the accident. I know all about the threats. I know about it all, London. I just never expected . . . you.”
“Jaxson, you have a child to think of.”
The brush of Jaxson’s hand along my arms soothed my nervous energy. “London, I know what the courts and evidence said, but I agree with your dad. I think there’s more to the story.”
“What makes you think that?” The words Mom said at the nursing home came back. Someone did something to her.
Jaxson watched me. “I don’t know, but people don’t change who they are at the core. I can’t imagine you going on a bender because something upset you after the time we’ve gotten to know each other. Were you ever like that?”
“No. Never. It never made sense, but the evidence is there. I’ve accepted my actions.”
“Think about this . . . should I be punished for the rest of my life for abandoning my son?”
I closed my eyes, abhorred by the image my brain conjured up of a neglected Ty. “It’s not the same. I took a little boy’s life while driving. I was behind the wheel.”
“Ty could have died if his mom hadn’t been lucid enough to drop him off. We dated for a few months. The last few times we didn’t use a condom. Then, I realized she was crazy and unbalanced. I found out she was conning me. Crystal wanted to find a wealthy man to set her up for life. I tried to get her help. She refused and I ended things. I never checked to see if she got pregnant. I should have checked, knowing we were having unprotected sex. The only reason she dropped Ty off was because her latest rich boyfriend didn’t want a kid.” I went to protest. “London, I’m not saying what you did was okay. I know a boy lost his life and you served time in prison. You’ll carry that burden for the rest of your life, more so than a true drunk and you have no recollection of it. I’ll always carry around how Ty came to us.”
I nodded, not sure what to say.
“In regards to the threats, I think someone wanted you gone, which leads to me still believing you don’t have the full story.”
Sometimes opening old wounds only left more scars.
“If I ever thought I would put Ty in danger, I would leave. I promise. I only think they wanted me gone from Guin.”
Jaxson’s jaw tightened. “Just talk to me first. Okay? We do this together. I would never put my son at risk, but if we try this, we do it together.”
“Together.” It was hard after being on my own for four years in prison to be connected with someone. “What about Ty? Jaxson we’ve known each other for all of two seconds. What if you don’t like the way I chew my food? Or I don’t like the way you put on your shoes?”
I knew my examples were stupid, but I wasn’t sure what else to say to get my point across.
Trying to be serious, Jaxson pressed his lips together before he burst into laughter. “If I get past your chewing, I think we can get past my shoe habits.”
I slapped his chest. “I’m serious. Maybe those were bad examples. Let’s talk about everything. Figure it out. Not say anything to Ty.”
He scrubbed his hand across his chin creating a delicious friction sound. “I’m not dating you in secret, London, like we’re ashamed. This affects Ty too. He’s a lot to handle, London. A lot. You’ve seen it. He’s part of the deal. It’s our relationship, but he’s part of it too. Fuck, I don’t know how to do this.”
“Have you ever dated with Ty around?”
“No. Not ever.”
Tightening his arms around me, I leaned on his shoulder. “We’ll get to know each other. Find out more. Not tonight. Not when I have to leave in a bit and your thoughts could talk you out of us. London, let’s see where it goes. For both of us. All of us. I don’t make commitments lightly, but I take them seriously.”
“Me too. I like the sound of that.” I sighed.
“Good.” A finger grazed my cheek and I shivered.