Having someone care for me felt foreign. Since I’d moved out of Aunt Leelyn’s house, I’d been on my own, taking care of myself.
I looked like a wreck, but Gael had seen me at my worse. “You can come in.”
The door opened and Gael walked in. He touched the sides of my face, then rubbed his hands down my arm. “You look like you’re feeling a lot better. I had a doctor’s appointment for you today if you weren’t.”
If this was a lot better, my worse was more horrible than I had imagined.
“I’m feeling better. I hope you don’t get what I had. Thank you for taking care of me.” Becoming tired, I leaned against the counter. Everything hurt.
Gael still maintained his touch on me. “Sweetheart, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Did you want to take a shower?”
“Yes, get all the ick off. I know I’ll be tired afterward, but at least I’ll feel human.”
Gael shook off his shirt and his lounge pants, leaving him in his boxers. “We’ll take a quick one together. That way I know you won’t fall and I’ll do all the work.”
“I’d like that.” Tenderly, Gael pulled my shirt off my head, then pushed my yoga pants down. His touch was reverent.
Walking us to the shower, Gael checked the water and adjusted it. “There, that’s better. Let’s get you cleaned up. Then, we’ll see if you can keep any soup down. Okay?”
“That actually sounds good.” My stomach felt empty.
“Good.”
Stepping in, the warm water felt magnificent as it hit my skin, taking away the sickness from the last few days.
Gael stepped in behind me and I felt something brush my leg. I looked down and saw his hard on. He was turned on still even after seeing me at my worse. Shaking his head, Gael spoke, “I can’t help it. Seeing you naked is the sexiest thing. But, nothing is going to happen in here.”
I playfully pouted my lip, surprised I could muster any desire in me at this point. But seeing the water bead on Gael’s muscled chest had me wanting him even though I’d be a limp rag as he did all the work.
He shook his head and chuckled. “It’s not going to happen, sweetheart. We’ll see how you’re feeling in a day or so.”
Day or so? We’d definitely need to talk about that when I was more rested.
Tipping my head back into the spray, Gael grabbed the shampoo and massaged it into my hair. The floral sent invaded my nose. Having him touch me, but knowing I couldn’t have him was one of the worst tortures imaginable.
I moaned. “This feels heavenly. I think I’m going to be in tip-top shape for something more later.”
Kissing my neck, he responded, “We’ll see. I’ll have to give you a clean bill of health.”
“Gael, you’re not helping things touching me like this.” My words were breathy.
He cleared his throat. “I know. This is harder than I thought it would be.”
The massaging motion of my scalp had me closing my eyes and focusing on his touch versus his body. “I’m going to wash you now, Ashlin.”
“Okay.”
I kept my eyes closed as the cloth washed my body, gently and lovingly. As Gael made it to my navel he spoke, “I was worried about you. I hope I didn’t scare you further away with me staying here and caring for you. I couldn’t leave you, Ashlin. You were sick.”
The tone he used had me opening my eyes to see Gael squatted and looking at my stomach with the cloth stopped. Instinctively, I knelt before him and cradled his cheeks in my hands as he had done with me time and again. There was a vulnera
bility I’d never seen before in my confident man that had been put there by me.
“You didn’t scare me away by being here. I can’t believe you stayed here and took care of me all this time. Gael, my feelings for you are strong, stronger than I’ve ever known and I’m afraid for me. I’m not sure I could survive losing you. I lose everyone else I’m close to and …”
Tears ran down my face as I let out my deepest fear of getting close to Gael. A fear I only danced around but hardly ever admitted to myself. I wasn’t able to finish the words that desperately wanted to get out. This was the ultimate reason why I had pushed him away when things became more between us. I hadn’t realized everything until I let my emotions free.
Gael searched my face as his thumb came up to brush my lips. “In time, you’ll see we’re the real deal and you never have to worry. Time is all we need, sweetheart. I’m not going to abandon or leave you. I’ll prove it to you, I promise.”