“Run, Jane, but when you get tired, I’ll still be here. I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter 24
Jane sat on a bale of hay as she watched her friends lead Sex Piston’s kids through the field to pick out pumpkins. Her youngest was dressed in blue jeans overalls, and Jane’s lips twitched at the little Harley motorcycle jacket he was wearing. The little boy was going to be gorgeous when he grew up. She didn’t envy Sex Piston having to deal with all his girlfriends.
Jane’s smile slipped and disappeared as Lily came into view. She was holding Chance, one of her sister Beth’s twins. Her baby bump was barely noticeable, and she glowed with health and happiness. T.A. came up to her, snagging the child away, and Lily laughed, brushing her windswept black hair away from her face. Jane saw her then go inside the store attached to the pumpkin patch.
Jane dug her boot into the dirt when she noticed Cade sitting on his motorcycle, talking to Stud and Dozer, his serious eyes keeping her within sight. Cade was constantly where he could watch Jane. Sometimes, she wondered why; other times, she ignored it, pretending he wasn’t there.
She was falling for him again, and she didn’t know how to stop what was happening. It was like standing on the edge of a cliff, knowing you were going to die if you jumped, but you did it anyway for the thrill of adrenaline that jumping would bring. Every time she let him lure her to his bed, she knew she would be jumping headfirst over that cliff. She couldn’t resist the feelings he gave her, though.
Lily came out of the store carrying two cups. Smiling, she headed toward her, and Jane scooted over on the hay bale to make room.
“You looked like you were cold. I thought this would warm us up.”
Once Lily handed her a warm cup of apple cider, Jane took a sip, enjoying the warmth and cinnamon taste. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. The kids are all growing so fast.” Jane caught the faint hint of sadness in Lily’s voice.
“Thank goodness. I’m on everyone’s speed dial for babysitting. How is Cash recovering from his accident?”
“He’s been moved to a rehabilitation center. He’s doing better. Shade says he’s getting stronger every day.”
“It won’t be long before he gets out and makes up for lost time with the women in Treepoint,” Jane wisecracked.
Lily laughed, tilting her head toward Cade. “Your boyfriend seems nice.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Jane denied.
“Does he know that?” Lily teased. “He reminds me of Shade. He never lets me out of his sight, either.”
“He’s nothing like Shade. Shade loves you. Everyone knew how he felt about you before you did. Cade doesn’t care about me. He just feels guilty and trapped.”
Lily went quiet, her eyes gazing back at Jane in compassion, before she said, “I didn’t see it, and maybe you don’t, either. Sex Piston told me about your loss. I’m really sorry.”
Jane blinked back tears, turning away from Lily. She was still heartsick over losing her baby. When she had found out she was pregnant, she hadn’t been upset; she had been overjoyed. She wanted a family so badly, and the tiny baby was going to be the beginning of one. After she had lost the baby, she felt all alone again.
“I didn’t mean to bring up something so painful.”
“It’s all right.”
“No, it’s not. You looked so sad sitting here, and I wanted to cheer you up, not make it worse.” Lily started to get to her feet.
“Don’t go. It really wasn’t anything you said. It’s me.” Jane licked her dry lips. “I was sitting here, watching you, and I’m so jealous I can’t stand it. I see you looking absolutely beautiful and healthy, pregnant with your baby, while I lost mine.” Jane felt the tears sliding down her cheeks, unable to help herself.
Lily enfolded Jane in her arms.
“I know I should be getting over it since I was only two months along, but I had already picked out names, and I was pestering Crazy Bitch to take me shopping for a crib. I love babies. I’ve always wanted a lot, and I didn’t miss Cade as much when I felt his baby in me.” Jane didn’t know why she was spilling all her baggage onto Lily, who sat listening as she held her, letting her cry on her shoulder. She had held back with her friends, but Lily’s gentleness had loosened the tight grip of grief she had bottled up inside of her.
After several minutes, she managed to gather her shattered control.
Lily released her, taking her hand. “There’s no need to be jealous.” She placed Jane’s hand on her stomach, and Jane caught her breath at the feel of the tightness of her growing womb. “We can share. I know nothing will replace the one you lost, but when you want one to hug or love, you can hold this one. He needs a godmother,” Lily said hesitantly.