Amber bit her lip. Her heart ached for him. The grief seemed raw. Was that wrong two years on?
But before she had a chance to say anything, Jack continued. “I know it’s stupid. It’s just a photo. I don’t carry it in my wallet. It’s in my suitcase.” He let out a wry laugh. “Jill would call me an idiot. But, sometimes, when I get carried away with things, it helps to remind me why I do this.”
“You do this for her?”
He leaned forward and put his plate on the ground, then rested his head in his hands. “I do this for them all.” He turned his head toward her and looked sideways through wounded eyes. “The wound dressing—the science behind it. It was all so much easier than realizing I’d lost Jill.” His voice broke and he sat up and held out his hands. “I don’t even know what would have happened. We might have stayed together. We may have grown apart. The one thing I am sure of is that we would always have been friends.”
Her heart twisted inside her chest. She’d never felt a pull to someone like that she felt toward Jack Campbell. It didn’t matter that it was all wrong. It didn’t matter what her brain told her. What made her heart twist was the fact she was sitting with him and he was talking about another woman. One who’d obviously meant a lot to him.
“Friends is good,” she said, trying to keep any emotion from her voice.
Jack kept his brown gaze fixed on her. “Is it?”
Her skin prickled. “What do you mean?”
“Are we friends?”
She shifted on the wall. “Well, I’m not sure…” Her brain couldn’t think straight. Was that the word she would use for the guy she’d met barely a few days before, shared a bed with, kissed and quarreled with? “Are we?”
Jack was leaning forward, his elbows resting on his knees, his gaze unwavering from hers. When he spoke his voice was hoarse. “What if, for the first time in a long time, I’ve looked at someone and wanted to be more than friends?”
The words swept over her skin. Half warming, half making every tiny hair on her body stand on end. Was that even possible?
Her hands automatically crossed her body and started running up and down her arms. “But I don’t date doctors.” It was like her default answer. She’d been saying it for so long that her brain found it easiest to resort to the familiar.
“I know. But you kiss them.”
Her mouth opened. She hadn’t quite expected him to be so direct. “You kissed me.”
“You kissed me back.” He straightened. There was a glint in his eye that seemed to be highlighted by the stars above them.
The world around them was a wreck. They were both wrecks.
But underneath them and underneath the land around them was a beauty that was hinting to get back out—to get back to the surface and let itself be revealed.
He drew in a deep breath. She tried so hard not to let her eyes fall to his broad shoulders and chest. To drink in the stubble on his jaw, and the way the expression in his eyes was so deep it just seemed to pull her in, like some kind of leash.
“I don’t know what this is.” The edges of his lips curled upward. “I know that our timing sucks. I know you think you shouldn’t date a work-obsessed doctor.” He put his hand on his chest. “I know that I’ve spent the last two years virtually avoiding all contact with anyone of the opposite sex. Some might call me work-obsessed.” He ran one hand through his hair. “But it’s so much easier to focus on work. To let it take over. To let it consume all your thoughts.”
She frowned. “I’m not sure you’re doing a good job of convincing me that we should be friends.”
He nodded and stood up, stepping in front of her and gently taking her by the elbows so she was facing him. They were only a few inches apart.
“How about if I tell you that I’m confused? How about if I tell you that my judgment may be skewed by hurricanes, lack of sleep, lack of food, forced proximity and a hypnotic smell of rose and orange that seems to follow me around?”
Her scent. He was talking about her perfume. She couldn’t help but smile. “I’m still not sure about the friends thing. I have standards, you know.”
“What kind of standards?”
“You know, they have to like the same books, the same movies and, most importantly, the same chocolate.”
“Ah.” He raised his eyebrows. “These could be impossibly high standards. I could be suspicious that you’re trying to stack the odds against me because I’m a doctor.”
She smiled and shook her head. “Quit stalling for time.”
He lifted his hands and rested them gently on the tops of her arms. “The answers would have to be crime, sci-fi and…a kind of chocolate that is only available in Scotland. I’m very loyal.”
She wrinkled her brow and gave her head a shake. “Oh, no, we’re not a good match for friends at all. It has to be romance, action movies and old-fashioned American chocolate bars every single time.”
He smiled and leaned a little closer. “I have another way we can check our compatibility level.”
“You do?” Now she could smell him. A mixture of earthy tones and soap.
His eyes were serious but he was still smiling. And she couldn’t help but smile too. She slid her hands up his chest as he leaned in toward her, and she tilted her chin up toward him. This time there was no dark store closet.
This time there was a background of noise, and a smattering of stars in the sky. Last time around things had been more tentative. This time, Jack didn’t hesitate. His lips were on hers straightaway. His fingers tangling through her loose hair, tugging her even closer to him.
She breathed in, pushing all the confusing thoughts from her head. She knew exactly where she was. She knew exactly what she was doing.
It didn’t make a bit of sense to her. But she’d spent the last few days with this man at her side. And even though they weren’t together, even though they weren’t a couple and even though he carried a photo of someone else in his suitcase, she still didn’t want to step from his arms.
His kisses were sure, pulling her in and making her want more. His body was pressed against hers; all she could feel were the strong muscular planes next to her curves. It wasn’t often that she met a man who wasn’t intimidated by her height. In general she could look most men square in the eyes. On a few occasions
, heels had been a complete no-no on a date. But with Jack she had to tip her head upward to meet his lips. Her eyes barely came to his shoulders.
As he kissed her, his hands slid from her hair to her waist. If she were anywhere else she might be tempted to wrap her legs around him, but somehow, in the middle of a disaster, and in front of a school, it just didn’t seem appropriate.
She actually laughed and took a step back.
“What? What is it?” Jack glanced around as if he’d missed something.
She shook her head and held out her hands. “We’re in front of a school that’s currently an evacuation center for around two thousand people. And… I’m still trying to decide if we are friends or not.” She was smiling as she said the words. Parts of her brain were screaming, but other parts of her were warm.
Jack sounded ready to move on. It seemed as though he’d looked inside and realized he’d spent too long blocking out the world and just focusing on work. Maybe now he would take a breather and decide what he wanted to do next.
That could be anywhere, with anyone. But that flicker of something she’d felt that first night in the bar was igniting wildly.
So when he held out his hand toward her she didn’t hesitate to take it.
CHAPTER EIGHT
HE’D KISSED HER. He’d kissed her again and again even though his brain couldn’t seem to formulate any clear thoughts.
Then they’d gone back to the apartment and kissed some more.
They’d fallen asleep with their arms wrapped around each other just as they had the first night. Except Jack hadn’t slept much.
He’d been too busy caught between staring at the woman in the bed next to him and looking out of the window at the bright stars above.
He felt…different. He’d spent so long focused on work and shielding his heart from any hurt that he’d never even thought about connecting with someone again.
And this had just crept up on him. Out of nowhere, really. One minute he was jet-lagged at a bar; next he was focused on the woman with the pink-tipped hair striding across the ballroom. And everything after that he just couldn’t really work out.