I stomped over to Ragna and she stayed still, allowing me to mount on her back without any difficulties. My sweet and patient girl. So unlike my husband and his stubborn stallion.
“Why are you trying to provoke me?” I hissed, once I was settled on the saddle.
“Why did you ruin us?” he said, toneless.
My jaw snapped shut and my breath hitched. “That’s unfair, Killian.”
He would always do this – throwing my lies and deception back in my face, so carelessly and heartlessly. As if to remind me that we were broken and maybe beyond fixing. I didn’t exactly blame him; I deserved it.
But I just wanted to have one freaking conversation without us shedding each other’s blood. Figuratively, of course.
We’ve had dinner every night for the last six days and our conversations were sometimes dull, sometimes entertaining, but always ending up in an argument. Killian and I were two unlikely forces, colliding together. Stubborn and furious. Guilty but determined.
“What’s unfair is you thinking I can forget everything and be the old Killian,” he said, harshly. “I’m not him anymore and nothing will ever be normal again with us.”
I swallowed, looking away from him and the raw intensity in his dark gaze. “Where are we going?”
He was silent for a second and I imagined he was trying to remain calm and aloof. When Killian spoke again, he sounded composed. “I can assume with much certainty that you have neither left the castle grounds nor explored the island yet. Well, except for your reckless trip into the woods.”
“Yes and yes.” My lips thinned at his cruel jab. “And to make matters clear, it was reckless but I wasn’t left with much of a choice either. You took Ragna away from me.”
I didn’t admit that I wasn’t thinking clearly that day, when I took Cerberus away from the stables. Not caring that he was an unpredictable stallion and that a storm was raging around us. My thoughts and emotions had been in turmoil and I was just desperate to be free of the shackles weighing me down.
“And that’s why I brought her back,” Killian said.
My fists clenched at my side. “Guilt or sympathy?”
“Neither,” he deadpanned, his face devoid of any humane emotions.
“Bullshit,” I shot back.
Cerberus shifted under Killian’s weight, growing impatient. I could tell he was itching for a run. “I feel neither guilt nor pity for you, Julianna. You’re the sole reason for your own unhappiness.”
I scoffed. “It’s ironic how alike we are.”
“I’d suggest you shut up now.” The warning in his voice didn’t deter me. Instead, it urged me on. I could handle Killian’s threats and cruel words. I’d rather those than his unsettling silence.
“Make me,” I urged.
“Julianna,” he growled, low and threatening.
“Does verbally sparring with me make you hard, husband?”
I was walking on a thin thread, crushing through the carefully laid boundaries between us. Forcing Killian to acknowledge what we had – the brewing tension and the unspoken feelings.
His shoulders tensed. “You keep testing the limits of my sanity, wife.” He gripped the reins tighter, his eyes flaring with something dark and dangerous. “It’s quite clear now. You only married me to make my life miserable. Because why the fuck would you provoke me so much?”
“Provocation is something we’re both familiar with.” Gripping the reins with one hand, I urged Ragna forward, so the two horses were standing beside each other, perfectly aligned. Like two fitting puzzles. “Shall we?”
Without a word, Killian urged Cerberus into a gallop. Ragna and I followed behind him, until I pushed my mare to match Cerberus’s speed, so that Killian and I were riding side by side.
The trees whizzed past us, our horses running free and wild. The air was cool on my skin, comforting. I didn’t have adequate words to express the freedom that came with this moment.
It tasted bittersweet on my tongue and I savored it.
We rode for about twenty minutes, the castle fading into the distance as we raced toward the opposite side of the island. Going deeper into the woods.
The first thing that caught my attention was the sound of rushing water before Killian came to a stop and Ragna reared back, also coming to a halt. Next to Cerberus.
Surprised, I gaped and took in the sight in front of me – the trees and the rocks… and the small pool of water that glistened several feet from us. A waterfall.
“I didn’t know–”
“Of course, you didn’t.”
Killian dismounted, before helping me down from my own horse. My feet were unsteady underneath me as I limped closer to the water. “Why did you bring here?”
“You must be bored out of your mind, to be stuck within that castle all day and night,” he explained smoothly.
“This place is magical.”
“Serene, yes. But magical is a far-fetched word to describe a waterfall,” he drawled.
“It’s magical when I’ve never seen something like this before,” I said.