"You're strong, overcoming all that."
"Yeah?" I blink back a tear. I need his words and his touch and his understanding.
But this might be it.
This might be the last time we're this close.
"Yeah." He presses his lips to my cheek.
"Do you want to be with me?"
"I need more time to figure that out."
"Okay. How much?"
His laugh is sad. "I don't know."
That's fair. But—"I haven't decided on my internship."
"Still?"
"Yeah. I know. I'd rather be here. But if there isn't an us, if you don't want to be with me, then I can't be here. Not for a while."
He nods.
"So, uh, I have finals. And then I have to answer."
He brushes a hair behind my ear. "You're nervous."
"You're deciding if you want to be with me."
"True."
"Which way are you leaning?"
"I don't know, sweetness. My head is a fucking mess."
Chapter Forty-Four
Walker
I step into the cozy meeting room. Nod a sorry to the guy at the podium. Take a seat on one of the scratchy folding chairs in the back.
This is an open meeting. Mom assured me that friends and family are welcome. She offered to come with me. She came close to insisting.
But I have to do this alone.
Whatever happens wi
th me and Iris, I need to make things right with my sister.
All right, I'm hoping that fixing this will fix my head. That it will reconcile those two halves of me—the I want Iris more than I want anything and the how will I ever trust her again?
It's worth a shot.
The guy keeps spinning his story of hitting rock bottom. How he missed an important meeting because he was too high. How it led to this ugly spiral. There's hurt in his voice. But that's not what has my attention.
It's the strange pride. He's glad shit got that bad. He's glad he almost lost everything.