Not turning around, she lifted a shoulder. “Ding ding ding.”
When he came up behind her, his Hugo Boss cologne washed over her, and the heat of his body touched hers. He was so big and hard and comforting, and she was this close to throwing herself into his arms and never letting go…
Screw the consequences.
“Well played.”
A smile lifted the corner of her mouth. “Point?”
“Yours,” he said, his tone begrudging. “But what did I tell you at the party?”
That you were going to throw me up against a wall and take me roughly? “Uh…”
“If you want to talk about my drinking?” Gently, he turned her around and rested his hand on her shoulder. The other reached out and brushed her hair out of her face. “Then your love life is fair game, too.”
His sweet touch, paired with his soft voice, and the way he looked at her as if she meant a whole lot more to him than she should, warred with his strong and possessive hold on her shoulder. The contrast did things to her it shouldn’t. Things that were a heck of a lot harder to ignore with two and a half shots of rum in her belly.
What was wrong with her?
She licked her lips. “Well, then, by all means. Speak.”
“Oh, I will.” He moved even closer, his gaze locked on her mouth. Why was the urge to close her eyes and lift her face to his so strong? “Are you scared?”
Terrified, actually. But not of what he might say. She was scared of the feelings coming to life inside of her. They were strong, and real, and they wouldn’t go away. For just a night, she wanted him, to be with him, and she didn’t care if it was a bad idea.
He glanced down, watching the path her tongue left, and took a small step closer. “Brian was a douche, and so was every guy before him. You keep dating men who don’t deserve you, and it pisses me the hell off.”
Her heart sped up. He studied her with a heat that could only be explained in one way. He quickly shook it off and gave her the same tender smile he always did, the one that said he thought of her as a sister, or a bro, and nothing more. “Funny, so do you.”
“I don’t date at all. I fuck.”
She bit down on her tongue. “I do that, too. Just more than once with the same guy. You should try it sometime.”
For a second, it looked like he might say something meaningful. Like admit that the reason he didn’t date was that he was scared to open himself up like that, or that he didn’t think he deserved love and commitment. But then he grinned, and the somberness in his eyes gave way to laughter. “Try fucking a guy? Well, they say you never know till you give it a good old college try…but I’ll pass. I like chicks, not dicks.”
“That’s not what I meant,” she said, frowning.
“What do you want me to say? That I’ll go out and fall in love with some girl?” He gritted his teeth so hard there was a grinding sound. “I tried that once already, with Rachel, and it didn’t work out so well.”
She nodded. “Yeah. She cheated on you. That doesn’t mean every other woman out there will, too.”
“Funny, considering most of your asshole boyfriends have.”
Sucking in a breath, she blinked. “That was harsh.”
“Shit. I’m sorry.” He blew out a breath and met her eyes. “I didn’t mean to say that.”
“Yeah. You did.” She lifted a shoulder. “And it’s true. Ever since the day I was born, guys love to leave me, or cheat on me, or both. History doesn’t lie.”
“The only way I’d walk away from you was if they carried me away in a coffin,” he said, his voice low. “I would never leave you.”
She couldn’t tell if he was saying he’d never leave her—as a friend—or if he was insinuating she should give him a chance to be more. When he lowered his hand from her cheek, she caught it, holding on tight. And nothing short of a tornado whipping through her kitchen would make her let go. “Steven…”
He swallowed hard, and his fingers flexed in hers, that heat still burning behind those warm hazel depths of his. “Yeah?”
Sucking in a deep breath, she rested her hand on his heart. It raced beneath her palm, speeding up even more when she locked gazes with him. There it was again. The heat she’d just sworn she would never see in his eyes. “You’re everything to me. And I…I want…”
Instead of finishing her sentence, she went with it.