I stared up at him, hot, excited, trembling. He slapped my face and I sobbed happily, opening my lips. He curled his fingers around my neck and slapped me again, amused. “Oh, you like that, do you?” The third slap wasn’t any harder than the other ones, but I did start crying harder, and then Devin was there, crossing the space between us, his face a furious mask.
“Stop! You’re hurting her,” he shouted, his voice hoarse with anger. “Get away from her, you asshole fuck.”
Chapter Twenty-Four: Devin
Milo was hurting Ella. He was hitting her as she cowered at his feet, and I lost it. He was hurting her, scaring her, punching her. That was all I could think about as I attacked him, shoving him away from her and throwing him to the floor. Maybe it was her tears, or her helpless expression. She was doing a scene, but in a flash, I saw something real, something I hadn’t seen in decades, something that made the child-Devin feel helpless and frightened, and furious as hell.
But I wasn’t helpless, not anymore. I pulled back a fist to defend Ella, but someone grabbed my arm, and hands pulled me away from Milo before I could land the punch.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Fort’s arms surrounded me, his voice against my ear. “Take a breath, friend.”
I struggled to get away from him, but two more men surrounded me, and I had to fight harder. I saw Ella in my peripheral vision, pale and wide-eyed behind her glasses.
“Let go of me,” I yelled.
“Not until you calm down.”
“What the fuck is your problem?” Milo yelled. “What did I do?”
He moved toward Ella again. To comfort her, of course, but I still saw danger. I was stuck in a cluttered, fetid living room years ago, and I couldn’t see any of what was really happening. “Don’t touch her,” I growled, trying again to shake off the arms that held me.
“Devin, don’t worry. It’s okay.” Ella’s small, scared voice tried to reassure me, but it only made things worse.
I turned to Milo. “You were beating her up, asshole. What the fuck?”
He blinked at me. “I wasn’t.”
“You punched her.”
His mouth fell open. “I didn’t close my fists, not once. I was slapping her. She liked it.”
That small voice again, Ella’s voice. “He wasn’t hitting me that hard.”
Another Dominant was guiding her to her feet. “Let me help her,” I insisted. “She belongs to me.”
Fort’s voice again. “No one’s letting go of you until you calm down.”
Juliet came to help Ella, wrapping her in a blanket, leading her away. Ella was crying, really crying. “Let me go to her,” I said. “I need to go to her.”
“You need to calm down. Let them take care of her for a minute.”
I was still straining to be let go. I was so angry, so furious. I turned my wrath on Milo, who stood in a defensive posture a few feet away. “You fucking bastard,” I yelled. “You hurt her.”
“I didn’t hurt her,” he yelled back. “She liked it. She was into what I was doing. You were fucking there, man.”
“You always go too far. Everyone knows it. You were beating her up.”
His dark eyes flared. “If you say that one more time—”
“You’re the only one here who doesn’t know the difference between kink and abuse.”
I knew that wasn’t true. Everyone knew it wasn’t true, but I was a child of abuse, and I felt trapped and triggered, and when he came at me, I broke free of the arms that held me and punched him in the stomach, and in the face. Milo punched me too, a glancing blow to the nose, then a wallop on the side of my head that threw me staggering sideways. I surged back toward him, but this time, both of us were caught by reaching, grasping arms. Every Dom in the place was there, holding us back from each other. I was making a scene. Ella was gone.
“Where is she?” I shouted.
“Ella’s safe.” Fort’s voice again. He had me in a headlock, his hand massaging my shoulder. “Dev, what do you need? How can I help you calm down?”
“He hurt Ella. Milo hurt her.”
“They were just playing.” Fort’s voice was level and calm, his fingers pressing into my shoulder. “Let’s take a minute to breathe, okay? Close your eyes. Breathe in, breathe out.”
I couldn’t close my eyes, but I tried to breathe. Milo had turned away from me, surrounded. There was blood. His face was pained. My face felt like granite, like it might shatter if I felt anything but anger. “He punched her,” I said, because that was what my mind had concocted.
“He didn’t. He wouldn’t do that.”
And I knew Fort was right, that what I’d seen wasn’t what was going on between Milo and Ella. I’d seen a memory, a nightmare. A ghost. As my pounding heart settled into a slower beat, I realized I’d been caught up in some horrible flashback brought on by her tears and her helpless whimpers.
“Do you know where you are?” someone asked.
I made a disgusted sound. “I’m not crazy. I know where we are.”
I felt the tension in Fort’s arms relax a little. “You know that Ella’s okay, then? We’re all okay. It was just a scene, and now it’s ended. Come on. Let’s go sit down.”
My cock was still hanging out of my pants. I shoved it in and followed Fort. He waved away Milo, which was good, because I wasn’t ready to face him yet. I was still processing the violence I’d done.
“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, sitting on the couch. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
?
?I know. Just rest here a minute, okay?” He leaned down to catch my gaze. “Ella’s taken care of.”
“Okay. Good.”
I opened my hands against my knees, rubbing my sweating palms along my pants. All the scenes were over. The Gallery was empty, except for a few lingering Dominants, and a couple of subs waiting in the balcony. Neither of them was Ella.
“Where is she?” I asked.
“In the bathroom, I think. Juliet will stay with her. How are you feeling now?”
“Embarrassed. Regretful.” I put my head in my hands and groaned. “I don’t know what happened, Fort. I just… I looked at him, and I looked at her face, and I saw him beating her up. I know that’s not what happened.”
“No, that’s not what happened. Milo would never do that. Not to Ella. Not to anyone.”
“I know.” I lifted my head and rubbed my eyes. “Jesus. Fuck. I feel sick. I don’t know what happened.”
“Sometimes things just…happen. If I had to guess, I’d say it involves your feelings for her.”
Her. Ella. I hadn’t had many “feelings” before her, but now here they were, violent and unmanageable, tarnished by my fucked-up childhood. I’d catapulted back through time, seen an old nightmare taking place, even though it wasn’t taking place. “You know I’m sensitive about…you know…abuse.”
“I know, and Milo knows, but you should explain it to Ella if you haven’t.”
“I explained it to her, a little.” But I’m still afraid to face her. I totally lost my shit. “I don’t know what to say to her.”
“Tell her you’re sorry,” said Fort. “She’ll understand it’s related to your past. Everything will be okay.”
I hoped so. The calmer I got, the more I realized the outrageousness of my behavior. She was my submissive, and while she was in The Gallery, I was supposed to keep her safe. I stood, steeling myself to face her—and Milo. I’d broken up their scene, which was so against the rules. I’d punched my best friend and accused him of abuse, which was possibly outside the bounds of forgiveness, and I’d terrified Ella, which I’d never, ever wanted to do, except in a fun way.