“I hate that no one will listen to me,” she said, kicking in time to the blows. “Lord Baxter won’t respect my wishes. No one will help me!”
/> “I’m going to help you.” He took her elbow hard when she tried to wiggle off his lap. “I’m going to help you understand that you’re fighting a battle you’ve already lost. You’re going to marry, Lady Maitland. Not Stafford, I promise, but someone better.”
Someone better than him. He’d lounged beside her and fed her biscuits and currants while he daydreamed about carrying her deeper into the woods, and biting and licking her, and making her cry. All he could think was that her body was lithe and voluptuous, and that he wanted to ravage her. She’d be so easy to claim out here in the woods, with no one to stop him.
But he couldn’t ravage her. He did not ruin innocents. He might be evil and selfish and perverse, but he did not avail himself of virginal bodies or tormented souls. He didn’t normally spank them either. He didn’t know why he had succumbed in this case. Because of her lips as she shared his water? The aphrodisiac of her stormy feline eyes? The quiet wildness of Baxter’s woods? Did it matter now? He increased the sting of the blows, holding her wrists when she attempted to shield herself.
“Oh, please, I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m so sorry for what I’ve done. Won’t you please stop?”
“I’ll stop when I feel you’ve been punished enough,” he replied.
They were quickly nearing that peak. He knew he must be careful not to overdo things, lest he bypass punishment and move into the area of harm. She wasn’t some whore at a spanking parlor, with tough skin and a long-developed pain tolerance. She was a goddamned innocent…and he was a lustful bastard for taking advantage of her this way.
He stopped and rested his palm on her heated, heart-shaped bottom. It took herculean control not to spread his fingers apart and caress her. He wanted to stroke her quim so badly. He wanted to taste her, drown in her. No. Not her. Not unless you want her for your wife.
“Do you think you have had enough?” he asked. “Do you regret this morning’s behavior?”
“Oh, yes. Oh, please, no more.”
He let out a breath and righted her, and settled her in his lap. She looked tearful and flushed as she tried to arrange her skirts to some order.
“Leave that,” he said gruffly.
“I can’t! I feel very ashamed.”
It disturbed him, how she plucked and fussed at the material. He grasped her face between his fingers, and stared into her jungle dark, gray-green-amber eyes. She gazed back with an expression of torment. He had done that to her, hurt her and confused her. He had taken advantage of a conflicted young woman.
“I want to kiss you.” The awful, inappropriate words escaped from between his clenched teeth. It wasn’t even that he wanted to kiss her. He had to kiss her, or die of unsatisfied craving. He didn’t give her the chance to answer yes or no, only lowered his head to hers and took what he wanted. Myriad sensations assailed him—her small, yielding body against his front, the damp of her tears, the softness of her hair, her light intake of breath. Lady Maitland smelled of flowers and morning breezes. He kissed her at first with the faintest pressure. It was a whisper really, a caress of the most gentle sort. When had he last kissed a woman like this, with such caution and tenderness? Never.
He nibbled her lower lip, catching the sigh that escaped. So beautiful. So sweet. He tilted his head and kissed her again in the same tentative way. He felt her fingers uncurl against his open shirt collar. He thrilled at the light warmth of her touch…and then she kissed him back with all the ardent sweetness in the world.
Oh God. This was his punishment, this devastating kiss. He’d gone too far now, too far to save himself. He deserved it, this annihilation. He basked in it, tightening his arms around her and drawing her as close as her blasted skirts would allow.
As their kiss intensified, he set about teaching her to respond to him with greater skill, encouraging her, rewarding her with little hums when her movements mimicked his. He coaxed her mouth open and pressed his tongue between her lips, and died a little when she responded to him in kind. His hands roved over her back, tracing the elegant shape of her hips and spine, and then they wandered downward. She jumped as he gripped her bottom, but she didn’t protest or pull away.
Ah, her kisses were so innocent and raw, and so savage. He couldn’t bear to let her go, but there would be trouble if he didn’t. As her fingers crept up to his hair and curled about his nape, his cock filled to bursting. He was so rigidly hard that he ached. He could take her now if he wanted. Physically, he could do it. He had only to lay her back on the ground and flip up her skirts, and spread her legs. He could undo his breeches and drive right inside the tight, hot part of her he longed to possess. She wouldn’t resist him, he knew. Dreams of sensation filled his mind. His muscles prepared to do what he imagined, to push her back and overcome her.
“Mother of God.” He broke away and lifted her off his lap so quickly she nearly stumbled. He caught her around the waist before she fell and brought her to his side, and pressed his face against her neck. “I’m sorry,” he said when he had his voice again. “I shouldn’t have mauled you like that.”
He felt her fingers go still upon his back. “What does that mean? To maul me?”
“It’s what I did to you just now.”
“Oh. I thought that was a kiss.”
Annihilation. Not before, no. Right now. He forced himself to raise his eyes and look at her. “Was that your first kiss, then?”
“My first kiss, and my first spanking…like that.”
He closed his eyes and sighed. “You should know: it is very improper for a gentleman to kiss a lady in such an abandoned fashion, unless they are at least engaged to be wed. Even then…”
She shifted, so he had to loosen his grip. “Then you have done something you should not have,” she said in a quiet voice. “And I have too, for I kissed you also.”
He gave a defeated little laugh. “I fear it was my sin, on the whole. But there are worse things we could have done, and we didn’t do them, so we must be thankful for that.” He stood and stepped away from her, steeling himself against the feeling of loss. “And now, Lady Maitland, I think it best that we make our way back to the house.”
He picked up his coat and put it on, and picked up his satchel and hers. He wanted to comfort her, and yell, and kiss her again, and do all sorts of ridiculous things in that moment, but instead he turned in a north-westerly direction and guided her onto the proper path.
*** *** ***
Lord Warren walked ahead of her, helping her over roots and holding branches out of the way. How gentlemanly he could be when he wished it. She did not believe the other things he’d done were gentlemanly. This belief was supported by the fact that he could not seem to meet her eyes.
As for her, her bottom still hurt, along with the backs of her thighs. Her eyes felt achy from crying and her lips felt tender and bruised from the way he’d kissed her. She was afraid anyone who saw them would know at once the things they’d been doing.
What had they been doing?
Why had he kissed her in that intense and singular way, just after he’d spanked her so sternly? He had apologized and said that he’d “mauled” her. The choice of words set her teeth on edge, especially after her tiger dreams.
But it hadn’t felt like a mauling at all, even though he’d made tiger-like noises in his throat sometimes when he kissed her. No, it felt like something else. Something violent and exciting and tender at the same time.
“We’re almost there,” he said over his shoulder. “Are you doing all right?”
“Yes, I’m fine.” Mostly.
Josephine could see the rooftop of the house now, through some of the trees. He had said they had a far way to walk, but she knew she had walked farther this morning. She must have walked in circles several times. How lowering. What an absolute failure this day had been.
Lord Warren held out his hand. “Stop.”
She waited and listened, scratching her arm where a branch had scraped it. Oh, for a bath and her bed. She heard rustling along anot
her path, and a low, muttered oath. Lord Warren turned toward the sound and she turned too, and then both of them gave a start. Lord Baxter stood not twenty feet away, looking distressed and disheveled. As soon as he saw her, his face registered relief. He crashed through the brush to join them.
“My dear girl, where have you been? I sent to speak with you this morning, and the servants informed me you were nowhere to be found.”
At some point in this speech, Lord Warren had moved closer, and in front of her. Lord Baxter seemed to notice him for the first time, taking in his entire appearance, including the satchels he carried in his hand. Her guardian’s expression changed.
“What, running away together?” He looked specifically at Lord Warren. “I thought you were not of a mind to wed.” He turned and gave her the same sharp scrutiny. His eyes narrowed. “Have you been crying?”
Her guardian believed she had been compromised out here in the woods. She could see it in his bearing, his expression. Lord Warren said nothing. But then, he had promised not to, if she agreed to be spanked. But she had to confess her folly now, or Lord Baxter would misunderstand everything. “Please,” she said. “Let me explain. This is all because of my great foolishness.”
“What has happened?”
“I had meant to walk to Chapley this morning. I can’t say why. It was the silliest idea ever, and I got lost, and Lord Warren happened to be walking here too, which was a great bit of fortune, because without him I’d still be wandering around trying to find my way back to the house.”
She babbled all this out, and feared she sounded terribly guilty. He wasn’t even looking at her as she related this tale. His eyes were fixed squarely on Lord Warren’s. “Have you anything to say?” he asked the younger man.
Lord Warren didn’t, not for a very long time. The men only stood on the path, in the hazy light, staring at one another in a very serious way. At last, Lord Warren spoke in an uncharacteristically formal voice. “I respectfully request the honor of Lady Maitland’s hand in marriage.”