Just the thought of his older brother’s relationship sent up a fresh spark of longing. Rafe wanted to wake each night with Philippe in his arms. He wanted him there to share his worries and joys.
And if he was being truly honest with himself, he wanted Philippe to be a Varik.
“Please, Rafe. Come back to bed. I never meant to upset you. I’m sorry I even opened my mouth.”
Rafe crossed over to the bed and climbed under the covers. He pulled Philippe tight against him, loving the feel of his man pressed to his chest. “Don’t. They were words I needed to hear.”
“Maybe, but not now. It’s been a long day. We both need rest. We already have plenty to worry about without this.”
Pressing a kiss to the corner of Philippe’s eye, Rafe ran his fingers through Philippe’s hair over and over again as Rafe settled onto his pillows. “We will figure this out. The bastard attacking your clan. My clan identity issues. Us. We will figure them all out. I’m not giving this up.”
Philippe sighed, his body relaxing. He didn’t speak. Did Philippe doubt whether they would find a solution to their personal problem? God knew he was skeptical enough for both of them. But he would fight for them, even if he had to drag all of his brothers into it. He was not willing to let Philippe go.
Chapter Sixteen
Rafe checked his phone a final time as he climbed the front stairs to Marcus’s mansion. He’d dropped his oldest brother a quick message, warning him that he planned to stop by to discuss an important matter that evening. Marcus sent no reply, but then Marcus didn’t like technology. Didn’t like texting or even computers as far as he could tell.
Of course, Marcus had seemed old and grumpy even before he’d become a vampire. It was kind of amazing that he fit so well with Ethan. The young man was bright and vibrant, a ball of boundless energy and enthusiasm. Sort of like a puppy. Well, at least Ethan didn’t urinate on the hall carpet or chew on Marcus’s shoes.
Despite his youth, Ethan had plenty of bite, and he had no problem going after anyone who threatened Marcus. Not the wisest move, considering the fledgling was still quite weak compared to other vampires, but Rafe did appreciate his desire to keep Marcus happy and safe.
Rafe didn’t bother to knock. He just used his key and unlocked the front door. Marcus’s home was the usual restrained and old-fashioned opulence he’d come to expect from his older brother. Lots of dark hardwoods, Aubusson rugs, and old oil paintings in heavy, ornate frames. It was like stepping back in time, which left Rafe feeling both instantly comfortable and unnerved.
He was curious to see what kind of influence Ethan would have over the long years as they lived together.
“Rafe!” Ethan called from the staircase. He looked as if he was heading up to the second floor, but he’d stopped halfway and turned to gaze down at the newcomer.
“Good evening, Little Varik.” There was something about Ethan that brought a smile to his lips regardless of his bleak mood. The young man had lost his entire family to vampires, and yet he still had the capacity for love and compassion. For him, the world was a place to be explored and experienced. Rafe could only hope he would hold on to that wonder as the years stretched before him.
“I was getting worried about you.” Ethan descended a few stairs, one hand sliding along the banister.
“Why is that?”
“You haven’t posted to your Instagram account in days! No naked pictures or dirty memes.”
Rafe shook his head, his amused smile turning wry. “I’ve been a little busy.”
“That’s why you’re meeting with Marcus.” At Rafe’s nod, Ethan’s expression became grim. “Okay, but post something today. Even if it’s just a selfie.”
“Maybe I’ll post a picture of dinner.”
Ethan rolled his eyes, but at least the worry disappeared from his adorable features. “Oh, yeah. How are you going to label it? Hashtag FeelingOPositive.”
“I like that. I’ll tell Marcus it was your idea.”
Ethan’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. “Don’t you dare!”
Rafe tilted his head toward the double doors just off the main hall to the left. “Library?”
“Where else?” Ethan said with a laugh.
It was the one place they could always find Marcus. Well, there and in the music room, but Marcus didn’t linger there when he knew one of his brothers was going to pop over. As far as Rafe knew, Marcus was the only one of them to write original music, though it was rare for him to share it. Since the death of Julianna, Rafe wasn’t even sure if Winter and Bel still played.
Rafe lifted his hand in a small wave, and Ethan returned it before continuing up the stairs, probably to the office Marcus had set up for him on the second floor. The young man was attending an online college to finish his degree in coding or some other complex computer thing. Rafe didn’t understand it, but it made Ethan happy, and that was all that mattered to Marcus.