I walked into the closet and grabbed a bag.
“Pack, I’ll have the jet fueled to take us back for the funeral.”
“You’re unbelievable!” she roared. “You can’t just show up to your own funeral!”
“Oh, trust me, I don’t want to, but now that you know, they deserve to know too, and Phoenix refuses to tell them. Andrei says I’m all out of favors, and I owe it to my old Family.”
She smiled at me sweetly.
I frowned. “Why are you suddenly smiling?” Was she going to forgive me? Tell me I was a jackass, but at least run into my arms and say she had missed me.
“Oh, nothing,” Her grin widened. “I just can’t wait for my dad to slit your throat.”
I gulped. “He won’t kill another boss.”
“He just might… for his favorite, innocent little daughter, whose virginity got taken by Valerian Petrov.”
And just like that, that tiny glimmer of hope flickering in my chest died a quick death.
Because if she wanted her dad to kill me, I might just let him, so I didn’t have to remember what it used to be like to hold Violet Abandonato in my arms and hear her say my name.
Not Breaker.
But my true name.
Valerian.
No matter what, I was hers for a few days, and she was mine, and even death would not take that away from me.
And then I smiled too and left her to pack. The smile fell when the sound of things breaking against the wall hit my ears, and then a muffled sob followed by a scream.
I broke her first.
I broke her last.
So even though Breaker was dead—it seemed I kept all those tendencies to hurt and break those I loved the most.
Chapter Twenty-Three
My truth was out in the open, but my battle had just begun because what was broken would make them come, weapons in hand, poison raised, the people I once called family to end my days. —Valerian Petrov
Ash
“Another funeral.” Junior handed me the flask.
It used to be Breaker’s. We’d filled it with gin, so each gulp made me want to hurl, but it was Breaker, and it felt like the world was ending or was about to.
“I don’t want to go,” I admitted. “I don’t know how to put one foot in front of the other.”
My dad poked his head in the kitchen. We were all at Nixon’s waiting to go to the funeral together. The mood was somber. Tex had been drunk all day yesterday only to finally crumble at his wife’s feet.
The toughest of them all, sobbing like a baby in his wife’s lap.
I had shed too many tears this year for people who had left.
Everyone left eventually.
I took another swig.
Junior hung his head as Serena came over and sat between us on the couch. “Gin?”
“Yup.” Junior handed it to her.
She just shook her head as a tear slid down her cheek.
The only person who wasn’t drunk, drinking, or trying not to cry was King.
No, King was just pissed.
So angry that he’d gotten into a fight with every single boss and member of the Family, including Dom, who was the silent, deadly type one did not pick a fight with.
He got a few hits in on him before Dom slammed him against the ground and told him to control his rage before he tied him up and put him in the closet.
King just sneered at him.
And we all knew what Tex was thinking.
He had lost two sons that day.
Because King would never be the same. He was… altered, so when I caught him smoking pot, I said nothing.
He thought it would help.
It wouldn’t.
It just made you more numb; I’d gone down that road and came back even more depressed than before.
“Sister’s almost here,” my dad finally said after taking in the mood in the room. All the bosses were there.
Phoenix and Andrei were the only alert ones. What the hell kind of monsters counted weapons on the kitchen table before a funeral?
Those guys.
Phoenix started strapping a few guns to his chest.
Andrei did the same.
What the fuck? Did they think we were going to get attacked at the funeral of all places?
Good, let them shoot at me. At least I’d see Claire again.
Our baby.
I squeezed my eyes shut. “Do you know if Violet’s staying?”
My dad offered a sad smile. “All I know is she’s really enjoying studying with Nikolai. He checks in every day.”
I snorted. Dad was going to shit a brick when he saw her ring. That was if she was going to tell him that she was currently sharing a bed with some psychopath Russian who, according to Phoenix, wasn’t ugly, so yay for her.
“Hey.” Serena nudged me. “You already drunk, cousin, or are you just being your normal grumpy self?”
“Normal grumpy self,” Junior answered for me. “And for a second, I thought you said elf and started to laugh then realized I should probably stop drinking if I thought you calling Ash an elf was funny.”