Would a man ever again look at her and think, She’s lovely? One without hard fists? Did she want a man to notice her, get to know her? This new idea had to be part of moving forward, didn’t it? It was funny how in a previous, happy-go-lucky life she’d had her pick of gorgeous men, never had a problem finding a date for the glamorous occasions that came with being her entrepreneurial mother’s daughter. Not funny, really. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw no one to frighten her. Not that she expected to, but there were still times she just had to check, even though Paul would be in jail for many years to come. She’d lost a lot, but she was free.
Hold on to that. And, yes, think about maybe one day falling love.
Vicki nudged her. ‘Time to knock off, day shift’s here.’
Another night done and survived without too much drama amongst the patients. She could relax, except her muscles weren’t playing the game. The old tension tightened her stomach and neck, while her shoulder blades tried to meet in the middle of her back. Because of the past? Or did she put this down to the rare heat in her veins, stirred up by Nathan Lupton? Yeah, like that’d be a blast. It might be. As if. He’d have to get a lot friendlier first, though he had made an effort earlier. Were things looking up all round? Smiling at Vicki, she asked, ‘Which shoes are you wearing this morning?’
‘Those orange, thin-strapped ones you were green about last week.’ Vicki was a shoeaholic, with an incredible collection that made Molly envious—and that was only over the shoes she’d seen at work.
Molly laughed. Twice in one morning? Go for it. ‘Clothes are my go to when the urge to have some R and R in the malls beckons. Shoes always come second. Maybe I should try the shoe shops first next time because those ones are amazing. When you’re sick of them you know which locker’s mine,’ she said. ‘Let’s go change.’ As well as her trousers and blouse, she needed to put her game face on.
Nathan turned from the specialist taking over Geoff’s case. ‘You all right?’
‘Why wouldn’t I be?’ There were a million reasons, but he knew none of them, and never would.
‘Because you look ready to bolt.’
Make that one million minus one reasons. Except this morning that had been the last thing on her mind. Disconcerting. She’d been laughing and he’d thought that? She hated that nearly as much as she’d hate him to see the truth. ‘Actually, I’m working on how to nab Vicki’s shoes without her noticing.’
His expression softened. ‘Good luck with that.’
‘I reckon.’ Unbelievable. They were having a normal conversation for once.
‘By the way, you were good with Geoff.’
Surprise stole the retort off her tongue. She hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary, and yet he was saying that in front of the other nurses? She looked around at Vicki, then Hank, before locking eyes back on Nathan.
He got the message fast. ‘So were you two.’ He nodded. ‘Right, get out of here while you can.’ This time he was talking directly to Vicki.
Molly knew she could relax now that Nathan was no longer focused on her, but it wasn’t happening. Instead her body was winding up tighter than a ball of twine, and just as rough. Why did this man in particular make her feel a little lighter in the chest, as though hope was knocking? Hope for love one day? Sadly, never for family. That dream had been smothered as a wet sack would a flame by a fist in her belly that had stolen her baby and quite likely any chance of another.
She looked at Nathan as he laughed with Vicki over something, and her heart dropped. If only she had the courage to let a strong, confident man close enough to trust. Until now it never occurred to her to want the things Paul had stolen. But it couldn’t be this man waking her up. They were mostly civil with each other, but it took more than civility for a relationship to succeed. Or maybe it didn’t. There hadn’t been any of that going on in her now defunct marriage.
Flip-flop went her heart. Her stomach softened as the tension started backing off. As though her body was telling her it was ready to have fun. Had certain parts of her anatomy forgotten the pain of the past? It wasn’t wise. Or safe. But very tempting. And eye-opening. One thing this newer version of herself had in common with the last one was that it needed a man who had his own world sussed and wasn’t afraid to stand up and be counted. As long as he didn’t hurt her.
* * *
Nathan knew he’d overreacted to Molly O’Keefe’s false smile about the barbecue, but he’d had enough of those. Two months and not once had she joined the staff for a meal, let alone anything else, despite everyone trying to persuade her. Whether she thought she was too good for them, or she believed she wasn’t good enough, the jury was still out.
Yet she’d been quick to sign up for the barbecue. Part of him questioned whether she’d actually show up; another suggested maybe Molly didn’t back down once she’d taken a stance. Despite working alongside her, often in trying circumstances, he didn’t know her at all, which was unusual given the work they did. She didn’t fall over backwards to get on with him. That might make him egotistical, but nothing added up. He got on well with most folk, and socialised enough not to return to being the hermit he’d become after Rosie’s death.
Molly’s a challenge.
He stumbled, righted himself, his eyes seeking out the woman doing this to him. Did he want her to like him? Now, that sounded needy. Hardly true when he had his pick of friends, even women. His gaze cruised across the department to the locker-room door from where a burst of laughter came. Vicki was doing her best to be happy on her thirtieth birthday, but her heart was sad because Cole was supposedly deployed offshore with the army.
He couldn’t wait to see her face when he dropped his best friend off at their apartment this afternoon. It would be a big surprise, one he couldn’t justify when he saw the sadness lurking in the back of Vicki’s eyes. He’d prefer to tell her the truth, and have her meet Cole, but he’d given his friend his word, and promises were not to be broken.
Molly appeared in the doorway, a rare genuine smile lighting up her face and causing those emerald eyes to sparkle, though she’d glared at him earlier. He shouldn’t have pushed her buttons but, hell, it’d been impossible not to when he was exhausted after eight hours dealing with what felt like half of Sydney coming through the ED’s doors.
Molly rattled him in ways he couldn’t believe. He was not used to having his libido captivated by a woman who wasn’t interested in him. What libido? Since Rosie’s death there’d been little going on in that department, and when there was it was for relief, not involvement. He couldn’t imagine being lucky enough to find love for a second time, hadn’t been ready to consider it because who got that lucky? Yet today Molly had him questioning that.
Nathan shrugged. So there might be more nous behind Nurse O’Keefe’s non-confrontational looks and that beautiful, heart-stopping face than he thought. He should’ve wound her up weeks ago if the flaring temper in her expression was the result. Far more interesting than quiet and mousy, as he’d believed. A shiver ripped down his spine, but not because her haughty glare daunted him. Not a bit. Instead it gave him a sharp awareness of the woman behind the glare.
Molly was waking up his body, which he preferred to leave in sleep mode until he decided otherwise. The sense of being slightly off balance had come out of left field the day she’d started in the department, and now he’d had enough of feeling out of whack. This morning it’d been time to push her boundaries over not joining in staff events so he could get relief from these frustrating sensations. This reaction confused him, and made him feel more than annoyed. Yeah, frustrated. But as in sexually or more? He didn’t have a clue.
‘You all going to spend the day in there?’ he called out. No way did he intend heading to the café without making sure Molly didn’t do a runner, because, say what she liked, she had looked edgy for a moment. Vicki liked her a lot, so Molly doing an about-face wasn’t hap
pening.
‘Pretty much. How come you waited?’ Molly’s enticing shoulders had returned to their normal, slightly sloped position and her chin had softened back to quiet and mousy.
Except he no longer trusted his interpretation of that look. There was more to Nurse O’Keefe than met the eye. Deep down, had he always suspected so? And reacted accordingly by keeping his barriers in place to protect himself? For better or worse, there was a need ticking inside him making it impossible to look away, or deny how she intrigued him, or pretend he did not want her in his bed, underneath him. Or on top if she preferred. Jeez. He scrubbed his hands down his face. What was wrong with him?
‘You run out of words?’
Something like that. ‘I’m making sure no one gets lost.’
Her smile didn’t slip a notch. ‘I told Vicki I’d be there, and I never go back on my word.’ Then doubt—or was it guilt?—slid through her sharp gaze and she looked away.
‘Glad to hear it.’ What was that about? Had she let someone down? In a big way that had come back to haunt her? Behind his ribs a sense of confusion lurched and an unreal feeling of protectiveness crept over him. For Molly? Hardly. There was definitely far more to this woman than he’d realised, but why spend time wondering what made her tick when it was obvious she wouldn’t have a bar of him? She was a challenge. And causing a pool of desire to settle in his gut.
Could be hunger for food doing a number on him. Not Molly. He’d missed snack breaks throughout the night—always a bad thing. But nothing was dispelling that softening sensation in his belly as he watched her. Without even trying, she was doing a number on him. Bet he was the last person she wanted to spend time with, even if only over coffee. Was it time for a change? On both their parts? Could be it was time for him to step outside his secure bubble and poke at life, see where it took him.