Parenting fail.
I make up a half-truth. “A little bit. It was hard to see.”
“It was so awesome!” Moffy explains the thrill of the ride, especially to Xander who’s too young to go on it. By the end, I realize that Moffy is the only one here—besides his bodyguard Declan.
“Where’s everyone else?”
“They’re coming. We got on an earlier boat.” He squats to his little brother’s height, and Xander shares a cheese puff with him. Moffy crunches on it and asks, “I saw Goofy walk past, you want to go take a picture with me?”
Xander’s gaze drops and he shakes his head.
“What about an autograph?” Moffy wonders, knowing how his brother dislikes photos. He even finds ways to hide behind his older siblings in group pictures.
Xander wavers, unsure. He hasn’t clung onto me since I whipped out the snack food, so this is good progress.
“Come on, Summers,” Moffy says with an easy smile. “You have to fill up that autograph book. What happens if Ben has more than you, huh? You can’t let that happen.”
Summers.
Every time Moffy calls him that, my chest swells with love. He’s the only one who uses that nickname with Xander, since his namesake is Alexander Summers.
His soulful amber eyes rise up to Moffy. “Will you stay with me?”
“I’m your sidekick, Summers. I wouldn’t leave you for the world.” Moffy extends his hand.
Xander grabs hold, and they both stand together.
“Can I take him alone?” Moffy asks me. “I mean with Declan and Xander’s bodyguard. But…” Not with me. Before an incoming arrow pierces my heart, I remind myself that I bring attention wherever I go. He’ll have an easier time avoiding crowds without me, and I like that Moffy wants to hang out with his little brother.
Hesitating, I teeter from one foot to the other like I have to pee. Moffy may be twelve now, but Xander is only four. What if something happens? This seems like a decision Lo and I should both make together.
“Maybe you should wait…” I trail off, seeing Lo in the distance with the older kids and Ryke, all a little wet from the ride. For probably the eleventh time today, I count heads quickly.
Sullivan.
Beckett.
Jane.
Where’s Charlie?
I crane my neck. I lean sideways. My pulse begins to quicken, and that’s when both Ryke and Lo start frenziedly scanning the area around them. Realizing Charlie isn’t with the group.
“Charlie?!” Ryke shouts, drawing more attention to us.
I wait for the nine-year-old to pop out from behind a bench or a cluster of Mickey-shaped balloons. Nothing happens. I see phones pointed at us. I hear people call our names, but I don’t spot the oldest Cobalt boy.
Xander hides behind Moffy’s legs.
My bodyguard contacts the fleet with his earpiece. “We’re missing one.”
We’re missing one.
We just lost my sister’s child.
{ 56 }
July 2027
Disneyland
California
LOREN HALE
With my cell gripped tight against my ear, I stand in the middle of the park’s offices. Ryke and Lily talk to the park coordinators in a backroom, and at the front, Jane, Sullivan, Beckett, Moffy, and Xander sit on plastic chairs by the wall.
“He wandered off,” I say, practically hysterical over the fucking phone. “I don’t know where the hell he could be, Connor. He won’t answer when we call.”
This isn’t the first time Charlie Keating Cobalt strayed from the pack, but it’s the first time in goddamn Disneyland. I overheard his very long conversation with his parents before we arrived, and the general gist was to stay with the motherfucking group.
I run my hand across my neck. It’ll be my fault if something happens to Charlie. I’m the one who convinced him to ride Splash Mountain when all he really wanted was to chill at the hotel.
“Lo, calm down,” Connor says, his voice serene.
My face sharpens. “Are you serious? You’re telling me to calm down? How are you calm right now?”
“Because I know and understand my son. He most likely found the ride pointless, and he might’ve slipped out at the last minute. He’s either at the hotel or he’ll find you.”
He’ll find me? “He’s nine, Connor.” I exhale a jagged breath. “You’re supposed to be the smart one.”
“His age is meaningless, and I am the smart one, which means my opinion holds the most weight.” He whispers to someone else, voices muffled, and then he focuses on our call again. “Lo?”
“Still here,” I snap. “Is Rose on her way to the hotel?”
“Yes. Call me if he finds you.” He says it like there’s no way I’ll locate Charlie before he locates me. After his reasoning sinks in, I no longer argue. Charlie is intelligent, maybe a notch below his father, and if anyone knows that boy, it’s Connor Cobalt.
“Are you looking for him?” I ask.
“I have my bodyguards working with security, and I’m working on tracing his phone.” It’d be easier if Garrison were here. He’s good with electronics, but for the whole month, he went to London with Willow and their daughter. “But I choose not to panic.”
“Rose doesn’t carry the same philosophy.” Lily said her older sister turned into Xena: Warrior Princess over the phone, throwing out things like battalions, combat, blades and death.
“Neither do you,” Connor says easily. “Neither does Ryke. I believe there’s a name for this.” I hear the smile in his voice.
Hot-Tempered Triad.
That’s the damn name.
I let out a deep breath, my shoulders relaxed. Connor eases the alarm in my gut. He’s always been able to make uncomfortable situations more comfortable with just his voice and some words. Our lives would be drastically more difficult without him.
After we hang up, I think about what happened. I think about the future where we’re not around the kids while they go to high school—while they go to college. I think about this, and I storm towards the row of older children.
Sulli and Beckett sit on the carpet, doing crunches side-by-side in quick spurts. No one counts. They’re not competing against one another. These crazy nine-year-olds think training for swimming and ballet is fun. And we’re at Disneyland.
My face scrunches like they’re from another planet. I can’t even comment because I’ve seen it all before. Push-ups, pull-ups, sit-ups at random hours and random places—I’ve seen it from my own brother.
It’s a different breed of person.
It’s not me.
Jane drew a tic-tac-toe board on her hand and plays with Moffy and Xander, but my oldest son registers my looming presence, features serrated like a knife. He lowers the blue magic marker, not nervous or scared. I’m not trying to frighten Moffy.
Sulli and Beckett stop mid-crunch, eyes on me.
“You four.” I motion to all of them.
“There are five of us, Dad,” Moffy says coolly, smiling. His little brother is perched on his knee with a bag of cheese puffs.
“Xander isn’t part of this speech.” My youngest son looks up at me, reflective amber eyes that carry pure innocence, his gray Star Wars tank stained with orange cheese dust. “You’ve been an excellent Disneylander, Xander.” I only use the word Disneylander because I heard Lil use it, and it reminds me of her.
Xander starts to smile at the compliment.
Moffy frowns. “So that means we did something wrong?”
Jane raises her hand, but she speaks before I even focus on her. “Uncle Loren,” she says my full name like every Cobalt kid. “I propose that we not be punished for my brother’s personality.”
Moffy nods in agreement. “We can’t look out for Charlie. I’ve tried, Dad, but it’s not possible.”
I never have the chance to ask why.
Beckett speaks from the floor, sitting straight with one bent knee. “Charlie doesn’t want us to keep
him in the group.”
Moffy adds, “He wants to do his own thing.”
Jesus Christ. “All of you—you have to look out for one another. This is just the start to the kind of chaotic places you’ll go. And I get that Charlie likes to go off on his own, but you four need to stay in touch. At least get info on where he might be headed. If he won’t tell us, he should tell all of you.” I look to Beckett, the only tame yellow-green eyes I’ve ever seen.
He shakes his head, dark brown hair swaying with him. His expression just says, I’m sorry, but you’re not right. “The whole point of being alone is so that you won’t be followed and found. And if he did tell me, I would be the first to tell you, which is precisely why he wouldn’t tell me.”
Connor said something about that over the phone. Beckett is as concerned about Charlie’s safety as the rest of us. Maybe even more.
Sulli elbows Beckett’s arm and says, “Rep of push-ups?”
Beckett nods fast, and they change positions, doing meticulous push-ups. Lowered all the way to the floor before rising back up.