However, he knew, like the trailer, Jemma was only temporary.
He needed to get his shit together and at least make a plan, not only for a permanent home but for when Jemma left. She’d been sending out resumes and having phone, as well as virtual, interviews. He couldn’t imagine her being unemployed long.
That scared the shit out of him.
Knowing Dyna was in her capable hands during the day helped him concentrate at work. But he didn’t want to take advantage of Jemma by getting a second job, even if it was bartending at Pete’s part-time. He couldn’t stick her with Dyna for longer hours when she wasn’t even earning any scratch to do it as it was.
He was just relieved she took the day shift and most times she’d help him with the nightshift. Even though he never asked. If she helped him during the evening or night, it was because she wanted to or maybe because she felt sorry for him being so in over his head.
Too many times he’d sit on the couch with a crying Dyna, not knowing what she needed, and was close to crying along with her. When he’d almost be at his breaking point, Jemma would swoop in and save his sanity.
She seemed to have the golden touch with his daughter.
Since the evening wasn’t too humid, she sat outside the trailer with Dyna on a blanket in front of her. His daughter was getting stronger every day. He wasn’t sure if he’d be excited or scared once she was mobile. At least now, she couldn’t get into trouble on her own.
Jemma looked relaxed in one of the plastic Adirondack chairs Deacon and Judge had brought over. They had also dropped off an old grill and a couple small plastic tables and helped Jemma set up a little outdoor area to hang out at. While the pavilion wasn’t far, it was nice to be close to the trailer in case of a necessary feeding or diaper change.
All the outdoor area needed now was a pop-up tent or an awning to protect them from the rain and sun when they sat outside. He spent time out there to smoke, have a beer or toke on a joint when his nerves were shot.
How anyone survived raising a kid and kept all their hair, he had no fucking clue. But a few hits on a bowl, or joint, and a beer helped. He just kept it to a minimum while he was on Dyna-duty, and did his best to not partake at all if Jemma wasn’t around.
So, most of the time he and the rest of the guys at the shop, including Dutch, shared a bowl or bong out back at lunchtime. Doing so grounded him and kept him from hopping in his Impala, spinning the tires out of the garage lot and never coming back. Because every time he thought he was getting a handle on taking care of his baby, life punched him in the nuts and fucking cackled like an evil witch.
As soon as he got home, Jemma usually bailed on them, so she was gone a lot.
Most nights she’d make a plate for him before she left, or leave a meal in the borrowed crockpot, then head somewhere else for dinner. Sometimes Lottie’s, other times she’d walk over to Judge and Cassie’s. She had gone to Mansfield to have dinner with Deacon and Reese twice already.
Her and Reilly even went to Dino’s Diner the other night. They were close in age and, at the shop the next day, Reilly told him she’d had a blast hanging out with Judge’s sister. She wore a huge smile as she told Cage how Jemma was a lot of fun. She confessed they hit Crazy Pete’s afterward to sing Karaoke, shoot some pool and drink some beer. Afterward, Jemma took Reilly home to The Grove Inn since she didn’t have her own set of wheels yet.
Cage had no idea why Jemma didn’t stick around to eat with him, but after spending all day taking care of a baby who wasn’t hers, he couldn’t blame her for taking a break.
Did he like it? No.
Could he bitch about it? Fuck no.
He wasn’t going to say or do anything that would push Jemma away. He needed her too badly.
For fuck’s sake, more like desperately.
So, he was smart and kept his fucking trap shut.
As he approached, she said, “You’re late. Your shift started a while ago. I’m now on OT.”
“Good thing I’m not payin’ you, then.” Sure, he was late but he had a good reason.
“Oh yeah, good thing.” Her words dripped with sarcasm. Her gaze dropped to what he carried. “What’s that?”
He grabbed the eyehook he’d welded to the top and let the rest of the mobile fall free.
Jemma’s gasp and her slapping a hand over her mouth made him ask, “What?”