“Um… I get free coffee there.”
“Are you negotiating my offer?”
He went all deer in headlights, and I wanted to pull him to me and kiss him until he forgot he was nervous.
I was absolutely not going to do that, but I also wasn’t going to let him walk away. I wanted him here even if he dropped things and took a while to learn what I needed. Surely he couldn’t cause much damage behind a counter.
Until I’d had him seated across from me in my regular booth, I hadn’t let myself admit how much I looked forward to seeing him when I went to the café. Getting stellar service at Bacon and Bakin’ was way less fun than having Ezra trip over himself on the way to my table, not that I would ever admit that to Niall or Giorgio. No way in hell did they need more ammunition to play matchmaker for me.
I watched Ezra as he filled out the paperwork. I’d already watched him so much that I’d learned a lot about him. Hell, I’d assessed him before he spilled that water on my table all those months ago, another skill I’d learned as an operative.
He was left-handed. The index finger on his right hand had been broken. He’d sprained his right ankle, possibly multiple times. He could move quickly, but he needed more confidence. His clumsiness came from nerves rather than anything physical. He was much smarter than most people thought when first meeting him. He had a dimple in his left cheek I wanted to run my tongue over. His ears were pierced. He had no other visible piercings, but damn if I didn’t want to rip his clothes off to find out what other secrets he had to reveal.
Ezra chose that moment to look up. Our eyes met. I kept my expression neutral, something I’d learned to do to protect myself. But Ezra couldn’t hide anything from me. His cheeks were deeply pink, his lips parted, his eyes nearly glazed over. “I…”
“Do you have a question?”
He stared at me for another moment. “Um… it asks for my driver’s license number, but I don’t have a driver’s license.”
“That’s fine. Just leave it blank.” I didn’t need his license number to find out anything I needed to know about him. I’d done a background check on him months ago when I realized he always served my table if he was working.
Ezra’s gaze dropped back to the paper, and I wanted to cup his chin and make him look at me again. I was absolutely playing with fire. I had plenty of things to do before the shop opened for the day, and I was sure Ezra would be far less nervous if I left him alone. I just didn’t want to.
He fascinated me. His vulnerability made me want to hold and protect him. I hadn’t felt that way about anyone since I’d joined the CIA. I’d only had one actual boyfriend. I’d met him in a criminology class my last year of college. I’d been fascinated by his deduction skills and by how smooth and soft his skin was.
We’d left class, and he’d hurried on ahead of me. I made him nervous the same way I made Ezra nervous. I was nowhere near as scary back then, but I’d still been big, and I never let anyone intimidate me. Some asshole frat boys started picking on him. He’d watched, stunned, as I easily knocked both of them to the ground and warned them not to get up until I was out of their sight. I’d put my arm around his shoulders and guided him away.
We were close from then on, and I always made sure he was safe. After graduation, we never saw each other again. He took a job in California, and I headed to CIA training. We texted each other at first, but the messages became fewer and farther between. A year later, I found out he’d met someone else, someone much better suited to the quiet man he was, and I tried to forget how good it had felt to have a man who needed me the way he had.
As an operative, I could be sent on a mission at a moment’s notice, and the chances of me coming back from any single mission were never all that good. The last thing I wanted to do was get involved with someone. That kind of life didn’t mix well with relationships. I took pleasure where I could but never more than once. Nothing about that had changed since I’d left the agency.
At least not until Ezra. He made me remember how much I loved having someone to protect, but I still walked straight into danger on a regular basis, and after years as an operative, I wasn’t sure I even knew who I was anymore. I wasn’t fit for a sweet man like him. Physical protection and sex were all I had to offer.