“Jeans might be nice too,” Bliss added with a teasing lilt to her voice.
Eli barely glanced at either of them as he continued to study me before he finally stood up. “I was headed in to get dressed,” he said, his tone sounded tense. I hated that I was the reason he wasn’t more welcoming.
“Do you mind if I join you?” Bliss asked. She was wearing a poppy blue swimsuit with a white see-through cover-up. A beach bag that matched her swimsuit was on her shoulder.
“I’m happy to have the company,” I assured her. I must have been mimicking Eli’s frown unknowingly.
She turned toward my brother and went up on her tip toes to kiss him. I glanced away while he slid his hand around her waist. I didn’t want to stare at their little affectionate embrace.
Eli didn’t come over and kiss me, touch me, or anything for that matter. He simply walked back toward the apartment not even waiting on Nate to follow. I kept my eyes on the waves wishing I didn’t feel so disappointed, or hurt was probably a better way to describe it.
Eli and I were not what Nate and Bliss were. Comparing the two was unfair. But was my wanting what they had wrong? Couldn’t I want that too? Wanting it with Eli was the biggest issue. He was all I wanted but I knew very little about the past year of his life.
How dangerously I’d fallen for him without any walls to protect me.
Bliss took the seat beside me that Eli had vacated. There was a large umbrella between the two chairs but leaning more in my direction than hers. Eli had only mentioned that Nate knew a man who owned restaurants and needed a bartender at the one that was just opened in Pensacola. Eli had a degree in business, but he wasn’t looking for a permanent job. Something he could go and do then leave when the time came.
The man Nate was referring to was my uncle Cope’s business partner. I didn’t say that to Eli since he hadn’t said anything about who it was and I thought there could be a reason Nate left that out. I figured he’d find out when he got there about the family connection.
I glanced over at Bliss and at that moment some other force took over my mouth. Because I surprised myself by blurting out, “Do you know where all Eli went and what he did this past year?”
Bliss seemed a little shocked by my sudden outburst too, but she recovered quickly as a frown formed not only on her mouth but in her eyes. There was worry there and concern. That didn’t make me feel better about anything. This was what happens when you ask questions. You find out things you don’t want to know.
“No, he’s definitely . . . different,” she paused, and I could see the uncertainty in her eyes. Either she knew something, or she was reluctant to talk about Eli like this. As if their friend code said they couldn’t. I let her think it over and finally she sighed. “I don’t know this Eli. There is . . . there was . . . whatever happened with him this past year was bad.”
That got my attention. I sat up straighter. She wasn’t going to say something like that and let it go. “Why do you think it was bad?” I probed.
She looked down at her hands that were clasped together in her lap. “Eli has always been a rule follower, but he has saw the good in everyone. He was positive. He believed in things. He had”—she glanced up at me and said—“hope.”
I waited as she seemed to think about it some more. Although I hadn’t known Eli that well before, I could see what she was saying. The guy I’d been around a few times had appeared to be all those things.
“There is a sorrow at times then an emptiness at others when I look at him now. He rarely smiles. He has secrets, Ophelia. I can see them there behind his dark gaze and I love him like my own brothers. I always will no matter how he changes. But I don’t want you hurt.”
The words “probably a little too late for that” popped in my head.
“You don’t think the darkness is about his grandmother?” I asked, knowing it wasn’t all of it even if it was some.
Bliss inhaled deeply then gave me such a sad look my chest ached. “No, I don’t. Eli was the brightest most positive person in my life when I was battling cancer. He never allowed any negativity. He talked about the future like it was a given. That’s the Eli I know. This pain inside him was there before he came back. It had changed him already.”