I see. I nod. “Lass, I was raised by a single dad who thought boys should know how to wield a gun after toilet training.” After my mum and sisters died when I was just a lad, my father raised me himself, so no question there’s a decided lack of feminine touch in my history.
She winces.
“Never had a proper birthday, never had a proper childhood, but I knew how to drink shots when I was twelve, and the first woman I ever bedded was on my fifteenth birthday, courtesy of my father.”
“Bloody hell,” she mumbles. “Seriously?”
I shrug. “Aye. So when it comes to dysfunctional families, I understand.”
It’s partly why I’m so close with the McCarthys. They’re more family than any blood relative I’ve ever had.
She smiles shyly, in that way that makes me crazy. “I suppose you do. Then why don’t we head over now?”
I take her hand, and together we go. I don’t bloody care what her mum’s like. Meeting someone’s parents isn’t a reflection on them. But I do think it’s time to meet her, so I can get to know a bit more about McKenna.
I drive her to her mum’s and park the car.
She’s visibly nervous, twisting her hands in her lap. She tugs on the collar of her blouse, then tugs her skirt down a bit. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen McKenna like this.
“What is it, lass? Are you alright?”
“Aye,” she says, but she’s looking off in the distance again.
I love when McKenna and I touch. I love when we spar and fight and get a rise out of each other. But it’s times like these… times when she actually shows momentary, brief vulnerability… that I know how much she means to me.
I wrap my arm around her shoulders and draw her near so I can kiss the top of her head. Her hair’s adorably mussed up, and she’s leaning her head on my shoulder.
“Now, lass, you let whatever’s troubling you go, now. If you had any bloody idea what I grew up with, you’d realize I don’t give a rat’s arse about your own history. People who really live, live many lives within one, don’t they?”
She nods, then looks up at me, framing my face in her hands. Her eyes are bright, her voice a little choked.
“That’s an interesting way to look at it. Thanks for that, Tully.”
I kiss her cheek. “Don’t thank me. You’ll pay up later.”
She grins and playfully smacks at me, but I easily deflect.
Her next sentence takes me by surprise, a rush of words as if she’s afraid to say it and has to force the truth out.
“She also said my ex-boyfriend was by recently.”
I clench my hand on the wheel. With all my talk about living in the present, I do not entertain the thought of any man breathing the same air as she does, much less—
Christ, I can’t even think it.
“Oh?” I try to sound nonchalant, but it comes out harsher than I intend. She cringes.
“He was terrible, Tully. I never should’ve been with him.”
I shrug, again failing miserably at nonchalance. “Alright, lass.”
“I’m telling you because he’s been by, and he’s not a good man is all. Let’s hope he stays in the past.”
My fingers tighten on the steering wheel. “Tell me a bit more about this ‘not a good man.’” Many would say I’m not a good man, nor any of the men of the Clan. We’re ruthless when it comes to our enemies, and enforcing the code we live by. But we put our women on pedestals and give them our undying love and devotion. It’s as much clan code as any other rule we have.
“Now, Tully,” she begins, shaking her head. “No need to dig up details. You won’t like it, and I don’t wish to talk of him again. We’re through, and that’s all that matters.”
I turn to look her square in the eye. She grips her thighs, her eyes a little wide with fear, but there’s a fire in them I’m familiar with.
“No, that’s not all that goddamn matters. What did he do? Why did you say he’s not a good man, McKenna?”
“He’s a user, for one. When we were together it was harmless enough, a smoke here and there. But he drank, too, and heavily. I broke up with him when he got abusive.”
My vision blurs with sudden rage. “Define abusive.”
She shakes her head. “No, Tully. That’s all I’ll tell you. I know who you are and I know exactly what you’ll do.”
It takes all my effort to keep my voice steady. “His name, McKenna.”
She holds my gaze. “No.”
I breathe through my nose to keep myself calm.
“Look at you,” she says, her voice gentling. “You’re already ready to hunt him down and kill him, I know you are.”
She isn’t wrong.
“And I can’t let you do that. He isn’t worth it, Tully. He isn’t.”