What, was my older brother asking about my career as if he respected it as a legitimate choice?
“I think Ash is still figuring that out,” Ana supplied for me, sensing I was still too shocked by Colton’s line of questioning to come up with a response. And she was right. I hadn’t exactly quit The Blacklist, but we weren’t on the best of terms, either. Johnny, our drummer, had been fine with all my solo work, but Connor hadn’t. He’d hit the roof. He’d left me more than one drunk voicemail message at three a.m.—was there any other type of voicemail message left at three a.m.?—alternating between telling me I could go fuck myself to making fun of what a crybaby wanker I’d become with my new “touchy feely bullshit songs.”
Connor had a lot to sort out. I hoped he was able to do it, but I knew I couldn’t be his partner-in-crime any more. Hopefully one day we’d patch together a friendship again, but I wasn’t holding my breath. I had more important things to hold on to.
Wrapping my hand protectively around Ana’s waist, I drew her to me.
“Enjoy the party.” Colton nodded at the both of us, apparently already on the move. There, that was more like the big brother I knew, always large and in charge and moving from point A to point B on his to do list. Before he left, he leaned over to me.
“She’s a keeper.” But before I could agree and give him a “get in here, bro” hug, he added, “Don’t fuck it up.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, not so much feeling the hug anymore. But he was right on both counts.
Then he was gone and I had Ana in my arms again.
“When do you have to go on and sing?” she asked me as she wrapped her arms up around my shoulders.
“Not for a while.” I leaned down and kissed her again. I’d never tire of her taste, her feel, the sighing sounds of pleasure that slipped from her parted lips.
“I know this secret passageway,” she whispered up into my ear. “Not even the catering staff use it.”
“Yeah?” I smiled, liking where this was going. “That sounds naughty.”
“It is,” she assured me. “Last year, all kinds of naughty things happened back there with this rock star I’d just met.”
“Oh, yeah?” I gave her earlobe a light lick, then a quick, teasing bite. “That sounds filthy.”
“So filthy,” she agreed. “Just how I like it.” She smiled at me, full of mischief.
“Is that right?” I had her hand in mine, quick, leading her through the crowd before she could say another word. People smiled and tried to engage, but I pushed on ahead. We had a place to go, and I had a woman to do.
That’s how it was between us, how it always had been, right from the moment we’d met. Like a match bursting into flame. And even now that I knew I had her, that I’d have her for the rest of my life, it hadn’t slowed me down, calmed my insatiable need. The gift of Ana to have and to hold, it spurred me on. I needed to hold her, to have her, right then. And again and again for the rest of our lives. Lucky dawg that I was, I got to do exactly what I wanted.
EPILOGUE
Ana
“Show me how wet you are for me,” Ash panted after he pulled me into the empty hallway.
He made me so wet. His casual touches in the middle of a crowded party, the PG-rated kisses, all it made me do was think of more. Now that I knew how good he could make me feel, all he had to do was run a hand across the small of my back and I felt it deep in my core. Now, I was glistening and slick for him.
I slowly pulled up my dress as he watched. Then I slid down my panties to my thighs so he could see my slippery sex.
“So pretty,” Ash admired me. “Touch yourself, baby. Show me how you want it.”
I brought my fingers down. He liked to watch me touch myself. And it turned out I really liked showing him. Boy, did it feel good to be bad.
Slowly, I slipped my fingers into my folds, stroking myself, letting a moan slip out. I pressed against my clit, getting turned on as much by my fingers as by his reaction. He looked like a man possessed, fixed on my fingers slipping in and out of my pussy, licking his lips. His hand against the wall, his knuckles turned white as he gripped it. I could picture his hand against my wrists, holding me there roughly as he drove into me. It made me moan again as I worked myself.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked, low and rough.
“You.” I knew he wanted more, he wanted details, but I still felt shy sometimes. I still needed coaxing from him.
“Doing what?” he demanded.
“Fucking me.” My hand started working faster, pumping two fingers up inside, hitting my clit as I did it. My fingers weren’t anywhere near as large as his amazing cock, not as long or as thick, but they made me think of what it felt like. I tilted my head back against the wall and closed my eyes, imagining it was his cock inside me plunging, thrusting. I could smell him, so masculine and musky. I could feel his heat as he stood so close, studying my every move.
“Do you want me to fuck you against this wall, Anika?” he whispered so low and sexy.
“Yes,” I whined, my hand moving frantically against my pussy.
“Do you want it hard, baby?”
“Yes, please, please,” I begged.
He gripped my wrist and pulled my hand away. Then he brought my fingers up to his mouth. I opened my eyes and watched him suck on them with a deep growl of primal satisfaction.
“You taste so good.” He licked my fingers. “So wet for me. I’m going to slide right up inside you, aren’t I, Ana?”
“Yes,” I hissed in anticipation.
“Are you going to be able to keep quiet while I fuck you? You remember you have to be quiet. Can you do that, Ana?” He unzipped the top of my dress and pulled it down off my shoulders, then tweaked my nipple, hard. “I know you like to scream. You need to, don’t you baby?
“Yes,” I moaned.
He unzipped his pants and I couldn’t suppress a moan as his cock sprang out, huge and hard, veins bulging along its length. I saw a drop of precome on his thick tip and I licked my lips, imagining the salty taste. He brought his hand to his cock and pumped it for me to see.
“Ah!” I gasped, spreading my legs wide for him, wanting him to fuck me right then, no more waiting.
“You don’t want to wait, do you, my Ana?”
“No,” I whined.
He pushed me against the wall, took one of my breasts in his mouth and sucked hard. I smacked my head back against the wall again, the pain blending with the pain of his teeth on my nipple, then the sweet sensation of him licking and laving me. I bit my lip and moaned.
He grabbed hold of my ass and positioned me up where he needed me, then brought his cock right to my entrance.
“I don’t think you can be quiet. I think I’m going to have to keep you quiet.” And with that, he clapped his large, rough palm over my mouth and shoved his huge, thick cock straight up inside of me, deep. He was right. I couldn’t keep quiet. It felt too good, too much of a rush direct to my clit, and I screamed, muffled by his hand as he took me.
“That’s it, baby,” he encouraged me, loving how much I loved it, how much I needed him to fuck me, rough and wild. He pounded into me, slick and slapping, ramming me up against the wall. I wrapped my legs around his hips and held on as best I could, and he supported me with his hand, pinning me against the wall.
I loved the way he stretched me, owned me, possessed me. I’d never felt so controlled and yet so safe as I did with Ash. With him, I could let go completely, give in entirely to the sensations. I didn’t have to worry about a thing, I could just feel.
And with his hand over my mouth, I didn’t even have to worry about staying quiet. It heightened my senses, to have him clamping his hand over my mouth, made me feel all the more claimed. Like he’d stolen me away to take me completely.
I could feel the orgasm building up from deep within me, quivering and growing, pulsing and raw. I clawed at his shoulders and hips, mewling under the palm of his
hand.
“Hold your tits so I can see them,” he ordered me. I loved the rough tone of his voice, his commanding authority. I brought my hands to cup my breasts and held them in my palms, displaying them for his enjoyment. He thrust into me again and again, a grunt of male approval deep in his throat.
“Pinch your nipples, baby. Make it hurt,” he growled. I brought my fingers down to my erect tips and did as I was told, pinching the tender, swollen flesh. The pain and pleasure blended together, so intense my eyes rolled back in my head.
“Yes,” he hissed, fucking me, pounding me. “Yes, come for me.” He read my body, the tense shuddering, the urgent panting and I came on command, my orgasm ripping through me fierce and fiery. I screamed into the palm of his hand again and he kept it over my mouth, hard and possessive, as waves of pleasure rocked my body.
“Fuck,” he called out as he came deep up inside me, pumping his come into my quivering, needy pussy. “Ana!” He thrust up in me, deep, then once more before he sank his head down to the sensitive hollow of my neck. He licked and sucked me there, breathing heavy, marking me as his woman, cradling me.
He took his hand off my mouth and caressed my hair, kissing my jaw, my mouth. “You’re so beautiful,” he marveled. I don’t know how he did it, but he always managed to sound amazed, as if seeing me for the first time. As if he couldn’t believe he was so lucky to be with me.
“Wow,” I sighed, finally feeling a bit of strength return to my legs. I still needed his support, but I could start to stand again.
“This is how I like you, Ana.” He chuckled and caressed my bare breasts. “Unable to talk, stripped and wobbly, my come dripping down your leg.”
“Oh my God.” I laughed, blushing slightly at his words. Even though we’d been together a year now, even though he had me doing the nastiest stuff with him, he still managed to embarrass me. But I loved every second of it.
“You love it,” he teased, reading my mind.
“I love it,” I agreed.
Somehow, together, we managed to get me looking presentable again. Ash might like me looking like I’d just received a proper fucking, but that wasn’t any way to look at the annual Kavanaugh holiday party. Two years running. Actually, last year he’d just given me a blistering orgasm with his wicked fingers. A prelude of all that was to come.