From the corner of my eye, I caught Flame’s fingers tense, and his eyes closed. I knew what these movements meant, and every time he did them, I simultaneously felt paralyzed with fear, and intoxicated with anticipation. For I knew this was Flame fighting his urge to touch me. I often wondered what he saw in his mind? Was it like my sketches—innocent and sweet? Or was it more? Was it like when a man takes a woman?
I waited for the devastation those thoughts would bring. Of being taken in such a way by a man. But it did not render me motionless, like I feared. Instead it… it… warmed me.
Lifting my gaze, it was to see Flame watching me. Needing to gain composure and inhale fresh air, I stepped away and to the door. Bright light filled the room as the door opened, and a warm breeze swept across my face.
And I smelled the trees.
I heard the rustling of the leaves.
I felt the hot sun on my cheeks.
Flame stood behind me, his large protective frame filling me with peace.
“Flame! Fuck!”
A voice from our left pulled our attention. Striding across the clearing toward Flame’s cabin was AK. “Vike! Get the fuck out here now!” he shouted over his shoulder.
The door of the middle cabin then burst open, and a half dressed Viking rushed out. His long red hair was wet and hanging loose, and his leathers were unfastened. But as he ran toward Flame barefooted, his state of undress did not upset me, because the look of pure relief when he viewed his brother, almost brought me to my knees.
He was loved.
I wondered if he knew that these two men would do anything for him? I wondered if he understood that he had never really been alone?
AK came to a stop in front of Flame and I, Viking stopping just behind. AK ran his hand through his hair and rasped, “Fuck, man, we thought we’d lost you.”
I glanced up and Flame stared at them blankly. AK and Viking did not seem perturbed by this. Viking studied Flame head to toe. “You okay, brother? You feeling good?”
“Yeah,” Flame answered and Viking’s lip hooked into a smirk.
“Hell, man! It’s fucking good to have you back. Nothing’s been the same with you down. Me and AK have had to go on runs, just me and him, and it was fucking boring without you there to scare the fuck outta folk. AK’s too much of a fucking pussy to make folks piss themselves on sight. It’ll be good to have y’all back.”
Flame nodded his head, and AK said, “We got church soon. You coming? All the brothers wanna see you.”
Flame’s eyes flashed to mine. I could see his teeth grazing over the piercing in his tongue. He was anxious.
“I am going to my sisters. I shall wait for your return with them.”
Flame exhaled and said, “I’ll walk you up.”
Blushing under the heavy weight of Flame’s piercing eyes, I turned to walk away, when Viking called, “Little One?”
I turned knowing it was the name he used for me. He flicked his chin and said, “Don’t know what you did. Don’t really fucking care, but you brought him back from fuck knows where, and for that, you have our gratitude for life. You hear?”
Quickly nodding, I turned to walk to the line of trees. Flame walked beside me, and I asked, “Are you happy to see your friends?”
Flame kept his eyes straight forward, and answered, “Yeah.”
I frowned knowing he was thinking something else.
“What else are you thinking?” I asked.
Flame, without hesitation, replied, “That I would rather be in the cabin sitting near the fire, with you.” My heart leapt in my chest, when he added, “You draw and I like to watch you. I like you being near me. It’s better than standing under your window. I like being able to see you up close.”
I had not realized I had stopped walking until Flame stopped and looked behind. When midnight eyes fell on me, I felt my body tremble. I was so confused with the feelings accosting my body. I did not understand what was happening to me, and it scared me. But listening to Flame confess his thoughts to me, floored me.
“Why’ve we stopped?” Flame asked, and I could see his hands running over the handle of his blade at his side.
Forcing my feet to keep moving, I fought back the smile gracing my lips. “Sorry, I needed to catch my breath,” I answered as Flame fell into step beside me. As we walked up the hill, a question came to mind. “Flame?”
“Yeah,” he replied.
“I know that you like to sharpen your blades, but what else do you like to do?”
“I don’t understand?” he said quietly.
“I draw, and that makes me happy. I was wondering what makes you happy?”
I watched Flame’s face as his eyes flitted from side to side, when he said, “I watch you.”
Heat infused my body, and I whispered, “That is what makes you happy? To watch me? Does it not bore you? I am asking what makes you happy? What you like doing most?”
Flame shook his head, then his eyes that I adored so much, met mine. “Being near you. Seeing you.” I swallowed as his answer kept me frozen to the ground, and he looked from side to side again. “We’ve stopped again.”
This time, the responding smile on my lips could not be held be back. “I know. Let us go,” I said and felt his words play in every one of my steps, in every breath I took as we approached Mae and Styx’s cabin. Being near you. Seeing you…
Voices sounded up ahead, and as I broke through the trees to Mae’s house, Mae, Lilah, Beauty, Letti and Sarai were sitting out in the garden. When they saw me approach, Mae and Lilah jumped up from their seats.