My chest ached as she stared at that bit of gold and I rocked on my feet. I had no fucking idea how to do this. All this romantic shit. I wanted to tell her so fucking much, about how she made me feel, what she meant to me, but I knew I didn’t have the words. I wasn’t built to be able to tell her shit like that. But I’d fucking show her. For the rest of my life I’d fucking show her every single day.
I just wanted her to be mine.
Property of Flame.
I just wanted her as my wife.
“What is the other box for?” Maddie asked quietly, looking behind me.
I glanced at the only box left on the ground. “I’ll show you after.”
Maddie frowned up at me, but didn’t say anything else.
Then it got real fucking quiet.
Hearing Maddie breathing quickly, I watched as she straightened her shoulders and stepped even closer to me. Suddenly, she reached down, and shyly took hold of my left hand with her left hand.
Then those big green eyes I loved so fucking much lifted to lock onto mine. Maddie’s cheeks flushed pink, and inhaling a long shaky breath, she smiled and put her right hand over her heart. “I am so nervous,” she whispered, and just about crushed me where I fucking stood.
“Yeah,” I replied, feeling exactly the same and Maddie squeezed my hand. She always understood what was going on in my head.
“Because I want this so much,” she then whispered. “I… I just never… it is too surreal for me, being here, dressed like this, doing this. I… I never ever thought I could have this. But I have, Flame. And the miracle is that I get to have it with you.”
My chest clenched so tight and my throat clogged real full. Inhaling through my nose, I managed to ask, “Is it enough? Is this enough for you without a Pastor or some official here to make it real? Is this, just us giving each other rings, legit enough? I’d fucking hate it if it didn’t seem real to you, like a real wedding.”
Maddie pressed a kiss to our joined hands, and assured, “It is real, Flame. This is completely real to me. I do not need anyone else here to tell me what I already know… that I am yours, and you are mine. Our vows to one another tonight are what matters most, not a signed piece of paper from a stranger who has no idea who we are as people. What we mean to each other. What we have overcome together.” She shook her head. “No. This private ceremony of two is as real as it gets. There is no fuss, no frills. I am purely betrothing my heart and soul to you tonight, and you I. To me, that is the ultimate expression of our love. And it is perfect. There is you, and there is me. That is all we will ever need.”
“Maddie,” I groaned, needing to fucking hear those words so much.
Maddie traced the back of my hand with her finger, and with a quiet voice, said, “I have come so far since meeting you, Flame. I have grown as a person, but more than that, I have found solace in your arms. A wonder I did not feel I would ever get. We discovered what love is through each other, and we learned that we could move on from the horrors of the past.” A tear slipped down Maddie’s cheek, and her little fingers shook as she gripped hold of mine. “You are my miracle, Flame Cade. You truly are my soul’s other half.”
My jaw clenched as I held back the fucking lump crawling up my throat, water blurring my sight, when Maddie laughed a single laugh and shook her head. “I used to wonder how two people—one broken girl, and one broken boy—could ever move on from their dark and tortured pasts. But now I know. Together, that’s how. They fight their way through… together.”
My nostrils flared as Maddie took the large ring in her hand and pushed it down on my ring finger. And as that fucking piece of metal stared up at me from my hand, I thought my fucking black heart would explode from my chest.
Using my thumb, I turned it around. Maddie gasped as a gold engraving came into view. “My Maddie,” she whispered, reading the engraved name aloud.
“Yeah,” I hushed out, unable to find my fucking voice to say much else.
“Flame,” she whispered, “It is perfect.” Maddie traced over the ring’s words with her finger, tears dropping from her eyes. “Your Maddie,” she whispered under her breath.
Seconds passed as she stared at the ring on my finger. Lifting her head, she said with blushed cheeks, “It is your turn.”
Maddie shifted our hands’ positions so that I now held hers, and I felt my stomach drop. Gritting my teeth, I said, “I don’t know what the fuck to say.” I held Maddie’s tiny ring in my right hand, gripping it tight. “I’m not good… with words, Maddie. I’ll fuck this up.”
Maddie pressed her right hand over my heart and explained, “Just say what is in your heart, Flame. Here,” She took the ring from my hand and placed it at the top of her ring finger. “Say whatever you want to say, whatever you feel in your soul, then push the ring down.”
Sucking in a deep breath, I fought back the growing pit in my stomach, and said, “I’m shit at talking, Maddie. Can’t ever express myself right.” Maddie smiled, then looked up at me with the most beautiful fucking expression I’d ever seen on her face.
Lifting my right hand, I ran it down her pink cheek, and said, “But fuck, Maddie, I know this. I fucking love you. You fucking saved me. You fucking understand me. And you’re fucking mine.” I pushed the ring onto Maddie’s finger, and I caught a damn hit to the chest seeing that black and gold ring sat on her hand.