“But why are you sad?” she pushed again.
I stepped forward and pressed my forehead to hers.
“What you believe and how I live are poles apart, Li. The Hangmen don’t live a moral life. We live apart from folk, make our own rules, none of which chime with your faith. And I get that.” I blew out a sigh and said, “I just want you to be fuckin’ happy. I—”
The sound of a door opening behind me caught my attention, and ignoring Lilah’s gutting expression, I turned to see the pastor standing at the door, along with Mae and Maddie. Both were smiling wide at my woman. Mae urged Lilah to join them with a wave of her hand. Maddie looked calm, even happy.
Lilah hesitated and her blue eyes met mine. “Ky…” she said sadly, but I could see in her eyes she wanted to go.
“Go, Li. Go find out who you are.”
Lilah leaned forward and pressed her lips to my mouth. “Thank you,” she whispered, and I nearly broke down.
Lilah walked calmly up the stairs, shyly shaking the pastor’s hand. I watched as the pastor led them inside. Lilah followed without a backward glance.
I stared at the closed wooden doors for what seemed like an age and I thought my chest had caved in. I knew I’d lost her. How the fuck could I compete with God? I was a good-looking bastard with a damn near perfect body to match, but even I weren’t divine.
A whistle sounded to my right, and Styx was approached with two coffees. I leaned against his truck, head down, as he handed me a cup. Styx stood beside me.
He didn’t say anything, and after downing half my coffee, I said, “Pretty sure I just fuckin’ lost her, man.”
Styx sighed and put his hand on my shoulder.
“Fuck!” I spat and threw the coffee cup to the ground, ignoring the people around who were giving us a wide berth.
I ran my hands through my hair and breathed deep. Styx watched on. But his jaw was clenched shut and his eyes were narrowed. I could tell he was pissed outta sympathy for me, but I couldn’t look at it, couldn’t handle seeing his pity.
“I gotta ride,” I said and marched toward my bike. Stopping beside Styx, I said, “Make sure she gets back safe, okay?”
He nodded. I pulled out my keys the same time as the sound of the church doors opening creaked behind me. Footsteps clattered on the marble steps.
“Ky! Ky!”
Turning, helmet and aviators in hand, I saw Lilah pounding down the church steps, waving at me to stop.
Worried something was wrong, I dropped my helmet and shades on the seat and ran to her. “What the fuck’s wrong?” I asked, searching her face, bracing to kick some pastoral ass. “Someone in there hurt you?’
But Lilah didn’t stop coming. She ploughed straight into me, wrapping her arms around my neck. She gripped on tight, tucking her head against my neck.
“Baby? What’s wrong?” I asked again, fisting her short hair.
Lilah pulled back, her eyes streaming with tears. “Ky…” she whispered, and every part of me tensed.
“Which one of them hurt you? I’ll fuckin’ kill ‘em!”
Lilah pressed her hand against my cheek. “No, Ky. You do not understand.”
I froze. Lilah smiled wide, fucking blinding me. “It is so wonderful, Ky. The things they teach, how they worship… the pure life they lead…”
Disappointment ripped through my stomach, and I stroked a strand of hair from Lilah’s face. “That’s good, baby, yeah?”
She nodded her head, a happy laugh bursting from her lips. “Yes… yes, I love it. We all do. I feel that I belong.”
“Good, baby. That’s real good,” I rasped out, confused as hell for why she came back out. To torture me? To make this even fucking harder than it already was?
“Ky?” Lilah questioned, forcing me to look at her. I met her eyes and breathed real slow. “You saved me. You have saved me,” she cried, her bottom lip wobbling.
My heart thundered in my chest. “I… Fuck, Li,” was all I could get out.
“You gave me back my faith, a pure faith, one without condition. And I have you…”
“I’m a sinner, baby, damned. Why the fuck would you wanna be with me when you got a faith as strong as this?” I pointed to the church behind me.
Lilah tilted her head to the side. “Even salvation can be found through the love of the damned.”
And right there I was done. She weren’t getting away. She was in my bed, on my bike, and fucking forever by my side.
Lilah’s hand stroked down my cheek. “Love is life, and you are my love…. You are my entire life.”
As I stared at my woman, fucking glowing, telling me I was her life, I knew there was only one way to make this right. To lock her down so she never left again.
Placing my hands on the back of Lilah’s head, I blurted, “Then marry me, Li.”
Lilah froze in my arms and she gasped. “What?” she whispered, shocked.
“Marry me. You wanna do all this shit right. Then marry me.”
“Under God’s holy law?” she asked.
I shrugged. “Under a fuckin’ pink unicorn’s law for all I care, I don’t give a shit.”
“You would do this for me?”
“Baby, I’ve done a complete one-eighty for you. May as well shackle myself to you for life too.”
Lilah laughed, throwing back her head. “Then, yes, Ky! My answer is yes!”