I started walking faster. “Hurry,” I said, leading the way.
Doyle continued to guide us through the ship, following our movements with the black box, and directing us toward Blake’s signal.
I hurried as much as I could in sandals and the black dress. Fancy was surprisingly quick on her heels.
We ended up in a long hallway that was dimmer than others. I got the feeling staff didn’t want guests down here right now. “Do certain parts of the ship shut down around dinner time?”
“Maybe,” Fancy said, her man voice stronger now as she whispered. “Or this place is haunted.”
“It’s not haunted,” Doyle said. “She’s an idiot.”
I reached for Fancy’s arm, nervous. I didn’t believe it was haunted, but I didn’t like the lowered lights.
She took my elbow and we walked together down the hallway. “Don’t worry,” she said. “I’ve got a gun taped up next to my dick.”
“Maybe you should take it out,” I said.
“Take what out?” Doyle said. “Oh you mean her. Him. It. Don’t tell me. Never mind. Just find Blake.”
“I am trying,” I said to Doyle.
“Hurry,” he said. “Please. He’s the only brother-like person I’ve got. He was an idiot for doing this. He shouldn’t have brought you onboard. You’re making more trouble for him.”
“I’m sorry, Doyle,” I said. “I’ll fight with you later about it. Just help me find him. Which door?”
“There’s an Observation Deck.”
Fancy and I hurried down the hallway until we came across a door marked Observation Deck.
Fancy put her ear to the door and listened. “Nothing.” She moved to put her back to the wall next to the door, and then hiked up her skirt until she revealed the gun strapped to her thigh. She brought it out and turned off the safety. “I want you to open the door,” she said in her full, deep man voice, letting me know she was serious. “But do it and then back up. I’ll cover us.”
I gulped. I didn’t have time to think too much. I did as she did, putting my back to the wall. Maybe I needed a gun.
I reached over, twisting the handle. It was unlocked. I opened it, swinging it.
Fancy weaved her way around the door and aimed into the dark space beyond. “Freeze muthafuckabitch!” she cried out.
My heart leapt to my throat, surprised by her movement and force, assuming someone was actually inside. When no shots rang out, I peeked in.
The deck was a long bit of space, like the day room, only exposed to the open air. The area was empty of people, set up with chairs, tables and lounges nearby. I went to the rail and looked out over the side, realizing I was at the back corner of the ship. The water was dark below except for the white peaks of waves as we cruised along. There were lights from other parts of the ship glowing, but the observation deck was dark.
Fancy huffed. “No one’s here.”
I touched my ear gently, readjusting the earpiece. “Are you sure he’s here?” I whispered
“That’s where his little dot thing is. It says you’re in the same room with him.”
“Could he be down a level? Or up?
“Nope. Look around.”
I wasn’t sure how he knew, but I guess the GPS on the ship was more sophisticated than I thought.
“Maybe I should check the rooms next door?” Fancy asked. “You look around here for clues.”
That sounded like a good idea. There was clearly no one here. “I’ll have Doyle send up some of the guys.”
“I heard you,” Doyle said. “On it.”
Fancy left with the gun. I went back to checking out the deck.
There were chairs pushed together very neatly. It seemed like no one had been out here yet: too staged. I scouted the seats and then in a lounge, between the folds of the pillow. I dug into the pillows and I found a little black cord with the black box dangling from it.
My heart leapt into my throat. The box. The one around his neck. “I found the box,” I said. “He took it off. Or someone took it off him.”
“If he took it off and left it, I will murder him,” Doyle said. “Does it look like a struggle? Just tell me there’s no blood. I’m guessing there’s not, or you would have said something.”
I moved to the rail, looking out, worried he’d been knocked out again, and might be in another part of the ship. It was dark but none of the furniture looked like it had been messed with. Had Blake removed his black box himself? And why? Not a whole lot of people would know what it was, besides him.
I held the cord between my fingers. It wasn’t ripped or broken. Someone had to have pulled it over of his head.
Suddenly, I saw a light out in the ocean, although it was hard to gauge the distance. I thought perhaps it was another boat out there.
Then, for a split second, the light flashed. Then again. A signal of some kind. It was white, small, but it was definitely there.
I strained to look, not seeing anything. It was dark, and while the observation deck was dark, the rest of the ship’s lights weren’t focused where I wanted to look. It was impossible to tell what it was.
The door behind me opened. I turned. “Blake?” I said before I could stop myself from speaking. “Fancy?”
A dark figure stood in the doorway, facing me. I forced a smile, an excuse on my lips for being here in case it was a crewperson. I thought maybe it was one of the boys after Doyle called them in.
Before I could get a word out, the figure rushed at me, arms reaching for me.
I panicked and stepped back, my back slamming into the rail. I held my hands out, warding off whoever it was. I cried out, “Doyle!”
“What? Is it him?” Doyle said loudly in my ear.
I couldn’t see his face. He must have been wearing something over it. It was all shadow.
He collided with me, knocking the wind out of me and pushing me harder into the rail. His hands grabbed my hips and lifted until my feet were off the deck, my back angled over the rail.
I smacked at his body, but he was bigger than me and I was flailing, unprepared, paralyzed by terror.
Doyle kept calling after me but I couldn’t answer him.
The attacker’s hand caught my arm, and the bracelet snapped away.
I hovered on the rail, trying to correct myself, grabbing at him to regain my balance.
He pushed me hard, the weight of my body pulling me away from him, losing my grip on his shirt.
The next thing I knew, I was falling
backwards over the rail.
OVERBOARD
The moment I was over the side, I screamed, but the swift moving air hit my lungs and I lost my breath on the way down.
I was going to die.
Regret filled me immediately after. How stupid, how crazy but mostly, how wrong I’d been. I should have stayed near Axel. I should have kept my promise to him to stay with someone at all times. Fancy and I should have stuck together.
I should have never let Blake go anywhere alone.
I splashed down hard into the water, a smack against my legs and then my stomach. My body plunged in. The shock shut down my brain, all the regret and fear dissipating. I didn’t feel anything, numb all the way through.
I went down, down further. Down forever.
Was I going to sink and never come up for air? Was I going to give in?
I thought of the guys. Of Axel, Blake, Marc, Raven, Corey, Brandon. Could I disappear on them like this? Would it be better if I did?
Blake was right. The others were right. I had gotten pulled down. It was a depression. I realized in that instant, being down in the darkness, no light to guide my way, my lungs screaming for air, that I had more than once said something in reference to dying.
Yet here I faced it, and I didn’t want to die. It wasn’t the answer I wanted. Maybe it would be easier on everyone, but I was afraid to let go.
I held onto that fear, and felt it build into desire to keep going.
So I swished my legs, a revolt against dying. With the motion, my brain went into overdrive, thinking of the guys, of how I would change, if I only got the chance. I’d make things right. I’d force my way out of my depression, do whatever it took. I’d had enough of living in the dark. I wouldn’t be mean to them anymore. I’d be nice. I’d change. They deserved better than what I’d been.
I started to float upward. Not enough. Not high enough. I couldn’t see the surface, and knew I was never going to make it. I’d let myself go down for too long and I needed air now.