“No!” she exclaimed. “Oh my God, Sebastian, no! This is perfect. It’s way too much as it is. You shouldn’t have.”
“It needed done. That truck of yours was marking its territory from one end of this town to the other. Not to mention someone as beautiful and classy as you should have a vehicle to match,” he said, chucking her chin with a sexy wink. “Trust me, darling, it was nothing, and this baby is all wheel drive, so maybe we stand a chance of keeping you out of the ditches this winter.”
Taylor couldn’t help but laugh. Throwing her arms around his neck, she hugged him tight. She pressed her cold nose against his skin. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Stop that,” he scolded.
He tugged her arms from around him and took her hand, leading her over to the car. Pulling the keys from his pocket, he unlocked the doors. She cocked her head as she caught a glimpse of the anticipation still lurking in his gaze. Her brow knitted in admonishment as he gestured to the interior. Taylor’s shoulders slumped in defeat as she spied the shimmering pendant dangling from the rearview mirror. Despite the tinted windows, the glint of diamonds and silver was unmistakable. Blowing out a deep breath, she braced a knee on the driver’s seat and leaned inside to pluck it free.
She ran the delicate but sturdy chain over her fingers once she straightened. A small ring of diamonds and dark amethysts circled the teardrop pendant. She wasn’t sure what the centerpiece was, but the silver colored metal had an unbelievable gloss and sheen. Her bottom lip trembled with her efforts not to cry as she swung her gaze to Sebastian.
“Merry Christmas, darling. Look on the back,” he said, giving her a tender smile.
Her hands shook as she turned the pendant over. Their initials stretched across the back in a fancy, scrawling script. The message was simple, but so clear. S&T. Her breath caught as he took the jewelry from her hands and fastened it around her neck.
“Just a small token of my love,” he murmured, tracing the pendant against her chest. “I want you to keep it with you always.”
Unable to help it, she dashed the tears off her cheeks. His smile saddened as he helped, using the pad of his thumb.
“I’m sorry,” she sniffed. “I don’t mean to cry. It’s just so much. The lingerie…the boots, either would have been more than enough. I don’t know what to say here. What to do. Thank you isn’t enough.”
Leaning down, he stole a long kiss. The dimples in his cheeks deepened as he tipped his forehead against hers and smiled. “You don’t get it do you?” he asked softly. “This is my way of thanking you. You’ve brought meaning to my life—given it purpose. For the first time in a long time, there is a sense of light to balance the dark.” He shook his head, slowly against hers. “I would give you the world if I could, and it still wouldn’t be enough, Taylor. It would never be enough. I love you.”
The truth and simple sincerity of those last three words hit harder than she ever could’ve imagined. Clinging to him, she kissed him deeply. Every part of her heart and soul ached, straining to be with his, as if the barriers of flesh and bone between them was too much. When she finally managed to pull back, her knees trembled and the air left her lungs in a breathless whisper. “I love you, too.”
Smiling, Sebastian pushed the car door shut and then turned to scoop her into his arms. “Let’s get you out of this cold and back in bed where you belong.”
The thread of his fingers through hers was comforting and assuring. Clad in a sweeping black dress coat and charcoal scarf, Sebastian looked dashing, but the matching knit hat tugged down over his ears lent him an innocent and almost playful look. Taylor glanced up at his gentle squeeze and smiled. It had been a perfect day, a perfect evening in so many ways. Both her heart and stomach were full. The cold didn’t matter. Nothing did but the quiet serenity of the moment and the touch of his hand. She felt so proud to be his and so safe at his side. He pulled her closer, tucking her against him as they crossed the street. Sucking in a sharp breath of delight, she took in the sparkling white lights adorning the trees and lampposts winding around the lake. They reflected off the thin sheet of ice, shimmering like trapped stars beneath the surface.
Stepping behind her, Sebastian wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned down to rest his chin on her shoulder. Seconds later, the slender tip of his nose nudged her scarf down and she shivered as he pressed the icy tip against her skin.
“So nice and hot,” he said in a husky whisper.
Catching the double implication, she giggled. “Do you ever get enough?”
She felt his chest jerk against her back.
“Of you? Never.” He kissed his way up to her ear and tugged her lobe gently between his teeth. His low chuckle rolled through her when she moaned and squirmed, trying to get away. His grip tightened, but he relented. Straightening, he gave a quiet sigh. “I wish today could last forever.”
“Can’t it?” she asked.
His laugh was muted and sad. “No, baby. Tomorrow it’s back to work as usual. At least for a few hours. That call I had to take during dinner was Marx. He’s calling a meeting. Hopefully, everything else can wait until next year.” He paused and she felt his face turn toward hers. “How about we fly away for a few days? We can ring in New Year’s Eve anywhere you want. Paris, Rome…some hot, sunny beach where you can lay around in nothing but a skimpy bikini.”
Taylor turned to face him with an incredulous expression. Lifting her eyebrows, she pinned him with a pointed stare. “Haven’t you spent enough?”
He shrugged, suddenly looking uncomfortable. Lowering his head, he studied the sidewalk for a second before lifting his gaze back to hers. “It’s not about the money. It’s about leaving everything else behind for a while. Trust me, Taylor. My bank account isn’t hurting any.”
Reaching up, she caressed the side of his face with her gloved hand. She hated the desperation and torment suddenly clouding his eyes. They looked so wounded…almost scared. “Seb, what’s going on?”
His chest lifted as he drew a deep breath. Placing his hand over hers, he leaned into her touch. “Nothing. Just dreading going back to the daily grind, I guess.”
“But if you have so much money, why don’t you just quit?”
He gave a dry laugh. “It doesn’t work that way in my line of work. Besides, I’d still have bills to pay. I want to build up a big enough cushion that I can retire someday, and if we do have those kids you were talking about I’d want to make sure they’d be taken care of and get the best education possible. Maybe with all those benefits and possibilities, they could end up doing something they love. Something that makes them happy.”
She couldn’t keep the sorrow from etching her face. Pressing into him, she stared up at him for a long moment and shook her head. “What about you? I want you to be happy.”
He smiled down at her. Pulling her hand off his face, he kissed the inside of her palm. “I am happy, darling. The happiest I’ve ever been.”
Taylor watched as his mask fell back into place. All at once, the traces of doubt and vulnerability were gone. Leaning down, he brushed his lips across hers. She stood still as he claimed them slowly, then more deeply. Though her eyes were closed, she could feel the occasional person walk by, as well as their curious stares. His hand came up to cradle her head, and she thought her knees would give ou
t before he finally pulled back and gave both of them a chance to come up for air.
“Now,” he said, brushing the wisps of hair off her cheek from beneath her fluffy hat, “about New Year’s…”
Sebastian stared at the woman still fast asleep in their bed. The comforter had twisted during the night, affording him a tantalizing glimpse of bare thigh. Sprawled on her stomach with one leg hooked partially over the covers, Taylor looked so peaceful and content. His heart wrenched as he resisted the urge to say goodbye or sweep the hair off her beautiful face so he could have one last look before he left. It was better this way. Easier. If he had to look into those eyes again, he might never leave. Last night had been a first in many ways. It had been the first Christmas he ever remembered truly enjoying. He’d lost himself in the warmth of the day and the woman he loved. It was also the first time he’d ever felt weakness. At least since he was a child. Standing on that bridge, he’d opened up to Taylor in ways he never saw coming. He’d allowed himself to think, to confess things about his job he had no business feeling let alone saying aloud.
He shook his head. That kind of momentary lapse would end up costing him in more ways than one. Giving his neck a quick roll, he felt it pop. His gaze flickered back to Taylor as he adjusted his collar and straightened the tarnished silver pins adorning its lapel. His fingers stroked the cool metal outline of the skull and crossbones sitting on the left of his banded shirt collar. The right side boasted an Old English style S that was in no way a reflection of his name, only his organization. These were the only decorations—the only deviations. Everything else was straight black. He gave a wry frown. In many ways, the uniform was a true representation of the men who wore them: sleek, dark, and lethal. No mercy and no frills.
Lingering just a moment longer, he watched Taylor sleep. He wondered what she dreamt of, what sort of visions played behind her closed lids. For her sake, he prayed they were nothing like the horrors that haunted his. He swallowed. She’d come so close to learning the truth and it’d terrified him. Taylor was the one unblemished thing in his life. She didn’t look at him like everyone else. She knew a side of him no one else ever would. He’d tried so hard to keep her and his work separate. No matter how good things were between them, he couldn’t help but wonder if she would still love him if she knew the things he had done. The things he had to do all too often. It was a risk he wasn’t willing to take. Tearing his gaze away, he pulled on his outer jacket. The soft glide of leather filled the room as he cinched his belt around the fitted waist. Blowing out a deep breath, he braced himself for what lie ahead.