But this wasn’t the Mr Lindon I’d dreamed I’d to be going to Brayburn’s with. I’d imagined the dirty Mr Lindon with the burning eyes, eating me up on the way to the client’s place. I’d imagined the Mr Lindon I’d been masturbating over for years, finally reaching out to grab at me.
This Mr Lindon was professional and calm and everything I admired in the office.
I just wanted so much more. Needed so much more.
“Thank you for teaching me,” I said, and it came out more like a whisper.
That seemed to do something at least. He started a little in his seat, tensing up and pretending it was all about changing lanes, but it wasn’t. I knew it wasn’t. I could feel it.
“You’re welcome, Faith,” he said back, and his voice was lower this time.
I loved him saying my name. I wished I could ask him to say it again. Over and over.
It took everything I had to find the confidence to turn my head to face him. His profile was striking, his jaw so hard and firm. The shadow of stubble was brooding and hot and begging for my fingers to brush against the bristle.
Mr Lindon was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
He must have felt my stare, but didn’t shoot even the slightest look back in my direction.
“Brayburn’s should be a good outing for you,” he said, and his tone was flat again.
Fighting it.
Fighting us.
“I hope so,” I said back. “I’ve been excited.”
I made sure to linger on excited. Because I had been excited about it. Really excited about it.
Excited about him more than anything.
He swallowed. He actually swallowed, and his attempt to play it mundane was lost in that one tiny moment.
I daren’t believe it, but I had to. I believed it because it was real. I could feel it.
He wanted me.
He really did want me.
“I’ve been so excited about doing this for years,” I said, and couldn’t stop. “I’ve been excited about the antiques. I’ve been excited about the auctions.” I paused, trying my best to push myself. “I’ve been excited about you, Mr Lindon. About working with you.”
Another swallow from him and I couldn’t stand the flutter anymore. It was right through me, and I was burning up, even though it was stupid and I was an idiot who should know it would never go anywhere. How could it?
But it did. It really did.
“I love how excited you get, Faith,” he said. “It’s a delight to watch.”
I’m sure my cheeks were bright pink. I’m sure it must have been peeking through my foundation.
And that’s when I got the first real sight of him, the dirty Mr Lindon I’d been dreaming of.
“Good little girls get excited about learning their lessons, Faith,” he said, and his tone wasn’t flat anymore. It was alive, alive and deep and dirty.
“I am excited about learning my lessons from you, Mr Lindon, sir,” I said, and it was a whisper. Just a dirty, filthy whisper.
A whisper that did something.
He’d just turned his head to face me, his eyes eating mine up just right for the tiniest beat when the phone ring started up through the car stereo. The office number flashed up on the dashboard screen.
And just like that, it was over.
He cleared his throat and answered the call, and he was back to normal, done and finished. His voice was just the same as always as he talked Rachel on reception through some auction figures from Friday.
I looked out of the passenger window as he went through the details, knowing in my heart that the moment was done. My thighs were still pressed together and I wanted him so much it hurt, but I knew it was broken apart for today, gone in a flash with the stupid phone call.
Sure enough, the conversation turned back into the safe zone once his conversation with Rachel was done.
He asked me about Maple and Co. Antiques and what I liked so much about them. He asked about how many writing slopes I’d seen and whether I’d actually used them to work on. He asked me about the TV shows around college and who my favourite celebrity auctioneers were, and the whole time I answered I kept my smile up bright and meant it.
Even though I was craving so much more, I meant it.
We were at Brayburn’s before I knew it. He pulled up in their car park and reached for his briefcase from the back, and I was pleased to be here. Even though I wanted so much more, I was pleased to be here.
I told him so.
“Thanks,” I said, before we got to their main entrance. “I’m really grateful you brought me here. I’m really looking forward to it.”
His smile was amazing and unexpected. One of the ones I’d known so well when I was just a little girl.