And he’s built. Muscles that he doesn’t need to show off because they speak for themselves.
Because they are him, his dark eyes smolder, wanting me as he tears at his own clothes. Aching for me to-
“Like I said, honey. Just use the fan or go in the living room. Don’t stand there getting yourself all worked up about it… you okay? You look like you’re about to burst,” he says finally, standing back in front of me with his bag packed and checking his watch again.
The honk of a horn jolts me from my daydream and Dad pecks my cheek.
“Bolt the door behind me, there’s a ton of food in the kitchen. I’ll call you when I get there.”
It feels like four years of college and my whole life up to this moment vanish when I hear the front door slam shut.
Looking through the curtains, making sure Dad’s ride is heading down the road, a tall tail of dust behind it, I start to open up every window as I pass it, keeping the front door locked of course.
No point in being reckless, but I need cool air when it comes and now I have the place to myself, I can relax and slip out of my regular clothes.
Heading upstairs, I set the fan blowing in my bedroom after opening the window and getting some instant relief as I undress, still smiling to myself at my ideal man fantasy.
Until I catch sight of myself in my full length mirror that is.
I screw up my face, blow some air at myself, and toss my T-shirt over the mirror.
I’ve never liked what I see in the mirror, plus it’s ruining my fantasy.
Drying up my well.
Making my way to the shower, I suddenly stop.
I don’t hear anything, but I do have the feeling someone’s watching me.
“Dad?” I call out, covering myself with a towel and peering out over the landing, double-checking he hasn’t forgotten something.
Nothing. Nobody. I’m all alone still.
I blow some more air, shaking my head at letting myself get drawn into Dad’s story to scare me into locking up the house, but as I move back into my bedroom after checking downstairs I can’t help but feel like there is someone or something watching me somehow as I move through the house.
I creep over to the window, a sudden rush of cool air making me shiver and I feel my chest stiffen under my towel.
But it’s the sudden rush of heat to my center that makes me gasp.
Something on the breeze, a scent?
More like a feeling.
Whatever it is, it’s made me hornier than hell in an instant and my hand actually strays between my legs as I feel my knees start to shake.
I jump a little as my T-shirt slides from my mirror, giving me a full view of myself side-on as I stand by the open window, shivering like a leaf as I contemplate doing something that’s never crossed my mind much.
Something in the air, whatever it is has made me want to get down on all fours and pleasure myself so that whoever, or whatever I think is watching can have the full show.
So why don’t you?
I shudder again.
Because I guess all those years of being the Preacher’s daughter has left me a little uptight.
Okay, a lot uptight.
Even though I know deep down what I need, and I know my fingers just won’t do.
I need a real man, not that I’d know what to do with one if I even had one.
I want to stare out the window, to scan the yard and make sure nobody’s watching.
But I also want some more of this feeling, whatever it is, real or not.
My cool shower, with both the bathroom door and shower curtain open, is unusual for me. I’m hoping it will calm me down, soothe me, but it’s like the water bubbles right off me I feel so hot.
A new kind of heat, and it’s nothing to do with the weather.
There’s a large clap of thunder, right over the house and I can see the lightning shimmering with my eyes half-closed, all soapy as I wash myself.
I fight my own urges again, urges I’ve never had. Deciding I want skin on skin from my fantasy man, not some clumsy efforts of my own.
Plus what I feel awoken in me is so deep, so intense, I really feel like it’s waiting for someone else to unlock anyway.
Like it already belongs to someone else.
With the window still open, I flip off the lights after I’m done and lay on my bed, still damp from the shower. I let the gradually cooling breeze of the evening tickle me as I lay completely still, my heart pounding still.
The continuous flicker of distant lightning and the growl of thunder eventually eases me into a strange sleep.