“Let’s head upstairs, kids.”
Duke ran to the steps and was at the top of them before I even managed to climb four steps. Belle did her best to keep up with me as she climbed them.
“That’s a good girl. Keep going. Good girl,” I said as I encouraged her on.
Duke barked, clearly giving Belle the confidence boost she needed. Once she got to the top, she did a little circle and let out a puppy bark. Duke ran to my bedroom, but I turned and went the opposite way. “Come on, boy, not there.”
I stopped outside the door of what was once the nursery and let out what I knew sounded like a defeated sigh. I hadn’t been in the room since I had cleaned it all out. My hand reached for the door, and I pushed it open. Duke and Belle both ran inside, and I took one step in and stared out the giant window that overlooked the back of the ranch. You could see the rolling hills and what looked to be the first signs of spring attempting to show her face. I walked over and stared out, lost to the view and my thoughts. I closed my eyes and thought back to the day I brought Linnzi and Amanda home to this very room. How happy we had been. How happy Linnzi had been. I squeezed my eyes shut more tightly, and fought to keep the tears at bay…and lost.
“I miss you,” I whispered as I wiped at my damp cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Mandy. I’m so sorry I let you down.”
“It wasn’t your fault, Nolan.”
I spun around and nearly stumbled back when I saw Linnzi sitting on the floor with her back against the wall. She had been here the whole time. Duke and Belle were laying quietly next to her as she stroked their heads softly.
“Linnzi.” It was the only thing I could make my brain say.
She stared at me with a look that said she was trying with all her might to reach into my soul and make me believe that her words were true. “It wasn’t your fault. The accident.”
I looked away as I rubbed the back of my neck.
“Do you come into this room often?”
“N-no,” I managed to get out. “I haven’t been here since…um…since the accident. Well, when I came back for Truitt’s wedding. I had everything taken out and the room painted.” Another tear slipped free, and I quickly wiped it away.
Linnzi gave me the sweetest smile. “The rocking chair was right here. I remember sitting in it when we brought her home.”
It felt like someone kicked me right in my gut, but I nodded. “I remember.”
She sighed. “And over there was her bed, and that cute little cabinet you made sat under the window. Do you still have that cabinet?”
All I could do was nod. It was clear her memory was completely back.
She looked up at me. “Do you still have the paintings that we hung on the walls?”
Another nod, since I couldn’t seem to make myself form words, let alone speak them.
Linnzi stood, never once taking her eyes off me. She reached out her hand, and I felt a sob slip free.
“I’m so sorry, Linnzi. I’m sorry for the accident, for not telling you, for…for…”
“Staying away all those years,” she added.
My chest felt like a vise had a grip on it, and it kept turning with each word I spoke. I fought for every single breath I took. “For everything.”
She walked up to me, her hand still stretched out, reaching for mine. She picked up my hand and looked up into my eyes, forcing me to look away. I felt my jaw muscles tighten as I tried with all my might to keep my emotions somewhat in check.
“It wasn’t your fault.”
“Linnzi…” I croaked out.
Her hand squeezed mine as she spoke. “Look at me, Nolan.”
My eyes closed, and I couldn’t move. Suddenly, I felt her hands on my face, and she turned my head until I was looking down at her.
“Listen to me, I want you to hear every word I’m about to say. Okay?”
I closed my eyes once more.
“Damnit. Look at me, Nolan.”
Doing as she asked, I held my breath.
“It wasn’t your fault.”
Swallowing hard, I replied, “I—I promised to protect you both. I swore to you that I would…”
Linnzi reached up onto her toes and pressed her mouth to mine. I instantly wrapped my arms around her as she slid her fingers into my hair and drew me deeper into the kiss. Every ounce of guilt I felt slipped free. Every regret I had held onto for the last eight years vanished. All that mattered was this one kiss. It spoke of forgiveness, love, loss, regrets, dreams, and passion. All wrapped in one kiss from the most amazing woman I had ever known.