“I want you,” Kao interrupts me.
I close my eyes against the mixture of pain and hope his words cause me.
Why now?
It’s been a month since everything went to hell. He pushed me away. He treated me like crap. I’ll never forget his anger and revulsion.
But I still love him.
“I want to be with you,” Kao repeats himself.
When I shake my head, my hand instantly flies up to make sure the hair didn’t move away from my cheek.
Kao gets up and walks toward me. When he crouches in front of me, he places a hand on my knee.
“I lied when I said I only cared for you as a friend. I was scared I wouldn’t see again, and I didn’t want to tie you down to a blind man who can’t offer you anything.”
His confession rips the air from my lungs, and too scared to let the hope fully back in, I can only stare at him.
“I love you, Fallon.”
Hearing the words for the first time is bittersweet. It’s all I ever wanted, but now it’s overshadowed by the trauma we suffered.
“Not as a friend but as a man,” Kao continues. “One who fucked up badly. I can only hope with time you’ll forgive me and give me another chance.”
“You hurt me,” I whisper, the wounds his words and actions have caused over the past weeks still raw.
“I’m sorry. I wish I could go back and do things differently.” My eyes flit over his face, looking for any sign of pity. “I love you,” he says again.
This is not how I wanted to hear those words. Not when everything is broken.
“It felt like you died,” I admit, wanting him to know how much he has hurt me. “I can’t just pick up where we left off. Too much has happened.”
“I understand,” he immediately agrees. “As long as you’ll give me a chance to show you, I’m still the same man I was before the accident.”
I suck in a trembling breath. “That’s the problem, Kao.” A frown begins to form between his brows, and it has me continuing, “The instant life got difficult, you left me. I understand the blindness was a huge shock and adjustment, but you pushed me away. Harshly. You took all your anger out on everyone around you. When I told you about my injuries, you shoved me aside with disgust.” I’m unable to continue as the tears threaten to fall. I take a moment to swallow them back and breathe through the heartache. “You hugged Mila, but you wouldn’t let me near you.” I suck in another trembling breath, then whimper, “It hurts too much.”
Kao rises to his feet, and taking hold of my shoulders, he pulls me up. When his arms wrap around me, I have zero strength to push him away.KAOHearing how much I’ve hurt Fallon is hard. Needing to comfort her, I pull her against my chest and hold her tightly.
I press a kiss to the top of her head and say, “I was nothing short of an asshole. I’m so sorry. I wish I could turn back time and do things differently.” I press another kiss to her hair, then murmur, “One of the reasons I pushed you away was because I wanted to save you from being tied down by a blind man.”
Fallon pulls back and turns her face up to me. “What are the other reasons?”
“Because I hurt you,” I admit. “I can’t remember the accident, but I was the one driving. You got hurt when I should’ve kept you safe.”
Fallon just stares at me for a while, then she asks, “You can’t remember?”
Shaking my head, I explain, “The last thing I can recall clearly is us having lunch at the restaurant. There are jumbled pieces of getting ready for the date, but I don’t remember getting in the car or driving.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” Fallon states. “You turned my side of the car away from the truck and pinned me to the seat with your arm. You did everything you could.”
Hearing the words from Fallon makes me feel a hell of a lot better.
Then Fallon murmurs, “I told you to take that route.” She takes a shaky breath. “It was my fault.”
Frowning at her, I shake my head. “No, Fallon. It’s definitely not your fault.”
“You said we should never have been on that road, to begin with,” Fallon argues.
God, I wish I had never said that. I didn’t know we took Fallon’s route.
“I didn’t mean anything I said that day, Fallon. It was all lies. I wanted you to forget about me and to move on with your life.”
Fallon’s gaze burns on me as she asks, “Did you really think I’d move on?” She lets out an empty sounding chuckle. “Because then you don’t know me at all.”
“I wanted to spare you future heartache,” I try my best to explain.