“Hope you feel better soon,” I hear Hana tell Kao before she joins me out in the hallway.KAO“I’ll come by with Jade a little later,” Hunter says.
Fuck, is the whole crowd here?
After a minute, Noah grumbles, “You can stop scowling. They’re all gone.”
I let out a tired breath and shut my eyes.
“It’s bullshit, though,” he keeps muttering. “I totally get you’re angry and frustrated, but you’re treating your family and friends like shit.” I hear a chair creak. “This has to stop. Go for the fucking surgery and put us all out of our misery.”
I clench my jaw until I hear a door shut. “Noah?” I only get silence as an answer and figure he probably left.
Tired of lying down, I shift into a sitting position. A weird sensation ripples over me as if I’m not alone. I turn my face to the right, and a frown starts to form. “Who’s there?”
I can feel the air move. “It’s me,” Jase answers.
Fuck.
“Why won’t you go for the surgery?”
I suck in another breath and shake my head. I seriously don’t have the strength to take on Jase. The second he finds out I’m refusing because I don’t want to see what I did to Fallon, he’ll lose his shit.
“There’s no guarantee it will work,” I go with the safer option. It’s not a lie. There’s no guarantee I’ll ever see again.
Just thinking about it makes the air rip from my lungs as the blow hits for what feels like the millionth time.
“So? It’s worth the risk. It’s not like you can get anymore blind than you already are.” His words are harsh and cold, sending a shiver of anger rushing through me.
“For fuck sakes,” I grind the words out. “Just leave.”
Jase lets out a chuckle that sounds more like a warning. “And leave you to wallow in self-pity? Not a chance in hell.” I can feel him move closer. “Look, I understand it’s hard as fuck. It sucks that it happened, but you can’t let one accident define your whole life.”
“Fuck, Jase. Seriously?” I snap. “How the fuck do you understand? I don’t have much of a choice. This is my fucking life now.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” he argues. “Go for the surgery.”
I shake my head again as I let out a frustrated huff. “Leave it be.”
There’s a moment's silence, then Jase says, “I never took you for the kind to just give up.”
“Whatever,” I mumble, tired of having the same fight with every family member and friend coming through the fucking door.
“Yeah,” Jase mutters. “Whatever.” He moves like a damn ninja because I can’t hear shit until the door opens. “You’re breaking Mila and Fallon’s hearts. Keep going on this road of self-destruction, and I’ll be beating the shit out of you.”
I hear the door shut and scowl into the darkness. It’s easy for Jase to talk. He’s not the one who hurt Fallon. He isn’t blind.
I squeeze my eyes tightly shut.
Fuck. I’m going to lose everyone.
I hear the door again and start to shake my head, beyond frustrated and angry. “Can everyone just leave me alone!”
“Looks like he’s in a piss poor mood,” I hear Uncle Jax.
My body instantly tenses. Uncle Jax is the one person who might see through all of my bullshit. He dealt with my dad years ago when he almost died.
“You can say that again,” Dad mutters.
Fuck.
Both of them?
“Are you ganging up on me now?” I let out an empty sounding chuckle.
I feel them take a seat on either side at the foot of the bed, then Uncle Jax replies, “We’re here because we care.”
When I keep quiet, Dad says, “I wasn’t blind, but I’m pretty sure I know what you’re going through.”
I knew it was only a matter of time before we had this talk. Truth be told, I dreaded it. Dad’s been through his own hell, and I won’t be able to turn a deaf ear. Not when it comes to my father being so close to dying. Just thinking about it sends a shudder down my spine.
“I know how hopeless and frustrated you feel. I know how angry you are.” Dad’s words make emotion build in my chest. “I also know how alone you feel.”
I shut my eyes against the wave of despair.
“But you’re not alone,” Uncle Jax says. “You have so many people who love you.”
I nod, and lifting my head, I whisper, “I know.”
“Why won’t you get the transplant?” Uncle Jax asks.
Even though I know the reason won’t hold much ground with them, I answer, “There’s a chance it won’t work.”
“Ten percent, Kao,” Dad pleads. “There’s a ninety percent chance of you seeing again. Fuck, I didn’t even have a five percent chance of surviving.”
Bringing my right arm up, I rub a hand over my face. “I know, Dad.”
Fallon.
I can’t bear to see what I did to her.