She grimaced, shaking her head. “I should tell you, I would have hated a date like that.”
He looked crestfallen. “You’re not a Knicks fan?”
She gave him a quick look of disdain. “I’m not even sure if they play football or basketball, if that answers your question. I’m not a sports fan, though I do like hot dogs, and I’ve been known to drink the occasional beer.”
He was silent for a moment, as though thinking, before he started speaking again. “In that case, let me rewrite our first date. I picked you up at your house, and we went for a walk in Central Park. We stopped for hotdogs, and then lay on the grass and just talked for a while. After that, I showed you my plans for the prototype that was in construction, and then I took you home and gave you a very sweet good night kiss.”
“Just a kiss?” she asked as she started looking for the appropriate exit for the Henderson Center.
“Of course. Even an uncouth man-whore like me can tell that you’re not a woman who would let me get away with more than that on the first date. Of course I wanted more, but I was happy just to have that single kiss, and I relived that moment for weeks on end.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him that she might make an exception for him, but she bit back the impulse. That would be carrying their fiction too far, into the realms of an area she didn’t want to even begin to discuss. No one was likely to ask about their sex life together. They didn’t have to establish fictional parameters for that, so it was best to shy away from that entirely. Still, feeling like she was flirting with danger, she dared to ask, “You didn’t get handsy at all?”
He chuckled softly. “I wanted to, but I respect you too much to rush you, Angelina.”
The exit was approaching, and she merged smoothly over to take it, her heart thumping erratically in her chest as she did so. Perhaps it was wishful thinking, but he sounded so sincere when he spoke those words that she wasn’t entirely certain whether they were part of the fiction he was creating, or if they were really the truth. Did he truly respect her, or was it just a way to manipulate her? She had no idea and was no closer to determining his motivations when they drew up to the facility a few minutes later.
***
After signing in for visitor passes, they had made their way into the sparkling clean facility, and she had been pleased to note there were a variety of people mingling on the lawn once they passed the high walls and gated entrance. No one appeared to be wandering aimlessly, and from what she could observe, there were enough staff to patients to ensure everyone remained safe.
They had met with the director shortly thereafter, and Karen Winwood had showed them the facility, taking them on a complete tour of the grounds and the dormitories. If she chose to enroll Kevin in the facility, he would be in the dorm of single apartments, which would allow him a small level of autonomy, since he didn’t respond well to strangers.
He wouldn’t have done well with a roommate with whom he was unfamiliar, and the rooms appeared to be safe and surprisingly spacious. There were no hot plates or any other devices that could lead to Kevin injuring himself, and she was pleased to find out he was assigned a coach for the first few weeks, someone who would remain by his side until he settled in and grew familiar with the routine and found his own groove.
As she toured the grounds, she was certain this was the place for Kevin. It reminded her so much of their summer camping trips in the Adirondacks, when Kevin had blossomed, seeming at peace and sometimes even openly communicative, amid the natural beauty around him. By the time the tour had concluded, she was ready to fill out the papers and left a sizable check to secure Kevin’s spot.
There was an opening in less than a week, and she knew it would leave her just enough time to prepare him and gather his things. There was a hitch in her chest at the idea of leaving him behind the next time she drove through the gates, knowing he would be separated from her for the first time since he was born, but she knew it was also the right thing for him. She couldn’t give Kevin everything he needed, but she had a good feeling about the Henderson Center and was certain they could.
She was surprised when Connor reached over and put a hand on her thigh, squeezing reassuringly. She looked over at him with surprise, briefly taking her gaze from the road ahead.
“It seemed like a really nice place, though I’m certain you’re having a difficult time with the idea. I remember how angry I was when my father sent Lizzie off to boarding school. She called and begged me not to let him make her go, but I couldn’t do anything to stop him. She was a late baby, a total surprise for Dad and Mom, and after Mom died, Dad wasn’t really in a position to take care of her.”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I guess I wasn’t either, and I wasn’t willing to sacrifice my racing career to take care of her, but I felt guilty about it. I still do, but I know Lizzie is happy where she is now. Dad asked her if she wanted to come back home to stay a couple years ago, but she told him she wanted to finish school and graduate from her boarding school with her friends.”
The peek into him was a bit unsettling, and she tried to mask her discomfort. “That must have been tough.” Not tough enough for him to give up his dream, but she couldn’t really fault him for that. It was a difficult situation to end up being the guardian of a sibling, when he was only a few years younger than yourself, but who needed you for everything.
She had gone through it herself, and continued to do so on a daily basis, and she had dealt with Kevin’s disability since the time he was a baby. It would have been a lot to ask a young twenty-something Connor to abandon his dreams to prevent his sister from going to boarding school.
“Anyway, the point I was trying to make was she adjusted and adapted, and now Lizzie actually loves it. Sure, it’s going to be difficult for you and Kevin both to start with, but if it’s anything like it was with Lizzie, he’ll probably end up really liking the place, and you’ll know you made the right decision.”
She was touched by his awkward attempt to comfort her or assuage her guilt. “I already know I’m making the right decision, Connor, though I do feel guilty about it. The truth is, I just can’t manage Kevin any longer, especially when he’s aggressive. He certainly doesn’t mean to hurt anyone, and most of the time, he’s quiet and withdrawn.”
“Does he interact with you at all?”
“Sometimes.” She switched lanes before continuing. “I used to live for those moments when he’d make eye contact and allow us to hug him, but those days are few and far between now that Dad and Granny are both gone. I’m sure Kevin loves me as much as I love him, but I’m not able to bridge the gap with him the way my dad could, or Granny could, to a lesser extent. He’s been deprived of what he needs to thrive by staying with me, and though I don’t want to let him go or feel like I sent him away, I think it’s the right thing to do.”
She was surprised he suddenly stretched over and ran his thumb across her cheek. She would have demanded to know what he was doing, but it was at that moment she realized tears were streaming down her face, and she took the tissue he offered from the console with a small smile as she dabbed at her damp face. “That doesn’t mean it’s not hard, course.”
He nodded, looking sympathetic. “I know we aren’t really engaged, but if I can help you in any way through this transition, don’t be afraid to call and let me know. I’ll do what I can for you, especially since you’re doing such a huge favor for me.”
They were perilously close to having a moment, and she deliberately pulled back, doing her best to remove the intimacy from the encounter. “For a price,” she reminded him stoically.
He appeared to wince for a moment, but then his expression morphed to one of distance. “Yes, for a price. That doesn’t mean it’s any less helpful on your part.”
“And thank you for your offer of help, Connor. It means a lot.” It really did, especially coming from the man she had assumed was little more than a self-absorbed man-whore, always chasing the
next race. She was surprised to find he was capable of empathy. Surprised and disconcerted, because she didn’t like having her preconceived notions tossed on their head. It was simpler to have a narrow definition of Connor’s type, to have him rigidly pegged into that, and to know what she was dealing with from that perspective.
The realization that there was more to him than what she had assumed was unwelcome, simply because it was making her warm up to him. If she started to genuinely like Connor, then she was more apt to do something completely stupid, like develop feelings for the man that she was ostensibly engaged to, but was supposed to dump harshly in the next month before the wedding.
She had to avoid that at all costs. It was simply a matter of self-preservation.
Chapter Five
Angelina managed to avoid Carly for the next few days as she prepared Kevin for his move, but her luck ran out Thursday morning. The doorbell rang at ten a.m., and she barely smothered a groan when she saw Carly standing on her doorstep, along with five other women. They politely ran roughshod over her as a mutual force pushing their way into the house on a wave of chatter and expensive perfumes that didn’t mingle completely pleasantly.
She was stunned by their myriad requests, with each woman wanting to discuss a different facet of the wedding. Carly was the coordinator, and she had brought along the caterer, florist, seamstress, and organist.