“I am far from the weak woman you had me down for. I won't be that woman.”
I know she won't. Nova is something special, something to be praised. She's not the kind of woman you underestimate. I did, I'll regret that for the rest of my life. But I'll also spend my life making it up to her. I just have to embrace the powerful woman she is, and be proud that she's mine.
“Baby, I'm sorry.” I reach for her, she retracts.
“Please don't touch me, Tank.” She pulls Ember closer, protecting herself from me. “Ember and I are leaving tonight.”
“What?” Hell, no! “What the hell do you mean?”
“I mean, we're leaving. You and I are over. I won't be with a man who runs from what and who I am the way you do.”
“You really think I'll let you walk away from me like this?”
“Yes! You don't have a choice!”
“Wanna bet?” I will not let her walk away from me!
I walk to her quickly so she can't walk away. I take her shoulders gently, I know she won't want to scare Ember, so she'll stand right here and listen to every damn word I have to say! “I love you, Nova. Jesus Christ, I love you so fuckin' much! I get why you did what you did to those monsters, and I admit that I didn't handle yesterday very well, and for that, I am sorry. But don't run because of it.”
“I'm not running, simply moving on.”
Why does she always have to act so tough?
Why can't she just let me in?
“Is that what you really want?” I implore her to say no, but the determined look in her eyes tells me all I need to know. Nova Jackson is no longer mine. She's going to walk away with Ember and start a new life somewhere else, with someone else. And there ain't a damn thing I can do about it. I've lost her.
Nova adjusts a now sleeping Ember in her arms. “What I want is for you to let me go without a fight. It was stupid of me to ever believe you could love the real me.”
“I do love the real you, Nova.”
“You don't even know the real me, Tank.”
“Because you won't let me!”
She smiles, kisses my cheek and turns away. And I just watch her walk away as I stand here like a statue. The only woman I have ever loved is walking away from me with the child I love as my own.
I need a damn drink.
My rental truck is all packed with the few belongings Ember and I have. I'm going to leave the keys to my bike with my brother, and the keys to my apartment. Jett will store my bike somewhere safe until I can get it picked up.
As for the rest, Jett will make sure Tank gets his stuff before handing the keys to my landlord. I only signed a three-month contract and that's almost up, so I doubt there's anything he can do about me leaving.
Hell, for all I care Tank can keep the damn place for himself.
Ember falls asleep in her car seat on the ride over to Jett's. I stroke her little PJ covered leg and smile. I bathed her and changed her into her PJ's before we left. I put her little housecoat on, strapped her in, covered her with her favorite blanket, stuffed unicorn in her hand, pacifier in her mouth. Didn't take her long to fall asleep. Good.
Sleep is good right now. She doesn't even know what's going on. I'm being selfish taking her away from the family who adore her, the people she loves. But she's still young, she'll forget all about them.
Me, on the other hand, I won't forget so easily. I won't forget how welcome everyone made me feel, how my father held me that first day and told me how much he loved me and would never leave me. I won't forget the day Tate told me how proud he was of me, how much he loved me, would always be there for me. I won't forget my siblings and how much they mean to me; how much they changed my life.
I won't forget all the members of the MC and how they welcomed me into their lives like I was one of them. I made so many friends, so many. I'd never had so many friends in my life before. Big bad bikers and their old ladies. The kind of people I swore to steer clear of, ended up being the best kind of friends.
I won't even acknowledge the man who broke my heart. But I will acknowledge my father’s wife. The woman who has become a grandmother to my daughter, the woman who has treated me like a daughter my whole life, even when I was gone. The woman who never gave up telling people I'd one day be home with them all.
As if my truck had a mind of its own, it brought me here to my dad and Lynette's house. My mind seems to be somewhere else. I'm staring out of the windshield in a world of my own. It isn't till there's a tap on my window do I jump out of my skin with my hand on my chest. Luckily for me, I didn't scream and wake Ember.
I open the window and smile. “Hey, sissy, what are you doing out here?” The way she addressed me was so familiar like we'd never been apart.
“Hey, Will.” Willow is so beautiful, long dark hair, curvy figure, and that smile of hers is always so genuine. She's a good soul, not a mean bone in her body.
“Is everything okay?” Her beautiful face is filled with concern.
“I'm leaving. I just came to say goodbye.”
“Leaving? Why? Oh, Nova, you just got here. Daddy will be so hurt if you go.”
“I don't belong here, Will.”
“Of course, you do.” I shake my head as I jump out of the truck. I close the door as quietly as I can so as not to wake Ember. “Where will you go?”
“I don't know yet, I just need to get out of here.”
“What about you and Tank? I thought you guys were in love?”
“It didn't work out.” I shrug. I don't wanna talk about Tank right now. Nor do I want to talk about the fact I have his ink on my body.
Why the hell did I do that?
Property Of Tank and his patch right across my lower back. All that pain, and trust me, tattooing the lower back is the worst kind of pain, but it was for nothing. I was an idiot!
Thank god she doesn't say anything. “I wanted to see your mom before I left.”
“She's inside with Sophie. Dad's out with VJ and Max.” Good. I don't want to see Shepard right now. I might regret not saying goodbye to him, but I'm stubborn. I would've liked to see my brothers, but we can't have everything.
“Could you watch Ember for five minutes, please? I don't want to wake her, and what I have to say to your mom won't take more than five minutes.”
“Sure, sissy.” She smiles sadly. I hate that I'm hurting her. I hug her tightly. I do love my big sister, I hope she knows that.
Leaving Willow with Ember, I find Lynette in the laundry room folding clothes. “Hey, Lyn.”
She looks up with a smile on her face. She is utterly beautiful, so g
raceful. She's wearing a flattering sweater dress of pale pink that flatters her slim figure, with her hair tied in a high ponytail. To look at her you wouldn't know she's given birth to four kids. She's beautiful, smart, strong. The perfect first lady of the MC. “Hello, darling. Is everything okay?”
What do I say to this amazing woman?
How do I thank her for everything she's done not only for Ember and me since we've been here but for Tate and my dad too?
Lynette raised Tate, and she did an amazing job with that possessive, overprotective big brother of mine. I dread to think who he'd be now if she hadn't loved my dad enough to be with him and take on my brother as her own.
I don't even want to think about it.
This amazing woman never asks for anything from anyone. The only thing she's ever wanted is for VJ, Max, and Sophie to know that Willow is my dad’s.
How did they get around that when they know Tate and I aren't Lynette's real children?
An affair.
That's how they explained it to the kids. Lynette and dad had an affair after she lied about her age. He went back to Celia because of that fact. He was hurt by Lynette's lies, so he told the kids, but he stayed in Willow's life and that's why they lived next door.
I don't believe the lie will never be found out. VJ is way too smart for a kid of his age. Willow is the only one out of all of us with hazel eyes, she’s no darker in skin tone than I am, and I guess Dad has told the kids Willow takes after his mother for her eyes color. It’s easy to buy when Grandma does have hazel eyes.
They should never have lied to the kids. But I don't believe it's a bad lie, just one so Willow never feels like she's not truly part of us. I guess Lynette believes that if the kids believe we each have the same father then we're all the same.
“I just want to thank you for everything you've ever done for us all.”
Like keep the whole family together and the hope that I'd one day be home.
“Oh, darling, you don't need to thank me for what comes naturally. My husband, all six of my children, and my little granddaughter are what make my life complete.”