But the rage bubbled, boiled inside of me, and reality was slowly slipping away. I took a step forward on trembling legs, my glaring eyes on the smirking face of my brother-in-law. “You’re not worthy. You are toxic.”
His smile began to falter, his amusement vanishing, and I could see I was beginning to strike further and further to where it hurt. And it felt so damn good that I couldn’t yet see the consequences of my actions.
My own cold smile began to form through the mist of fury, and I pushed, “You are nothing, the middle son, the forgotten one, so goddamned desperate for attention.”
Gio’s smile fell completely, crumbling away like bits of stone as the sea pounded angrily against a ragged cliff side, and for me, naked and beaten, the victory was immeasurable. Another step forward, less trembling this time, my small triumph had me doing this with a false sense of confidence.
My smile turned vicious, barely human, and I spoke through gritted teeth. “You can’t have her, you sick fuck. I’ll kill you first.” My finger wrapped around the trigger, but before I had a chance to cleanse the world of the pure evil in front of me, something came down hard on the back of my head, and as I landed on the ground with a thud, my head lolling to the side, my last vision before I lost consciousness was Dino taking my gun and handing it to his brother.
It was lost to me. I never saw it again, nor was I granted the use of a single weapon after that one incident. I think it was a shock to Dino. He believed me tamed in every way. I thought it was good to keep him on his toes, resisting ever so slightly at random moments over the years. I thought I was so smart. I resisted enough for Dino to have to repeat himself, never enough to truly make him angry. Truth was, at the time, resisting was all I had. I didn’t think too hard about what I was really doing. For Dino to have me struggle then submit over and over, it was a game to him, one I didn’t realize I was playing. My occasional defiance followed by a swift surrender had Dino thinking he was winning me, my body, every damn time.
Now that I knew this, I hated that I had given that to him.
So to have a man like Julius come into my life when I had fallen lower than the rocky crevices of hell, for him to hold me so tenderly when I cried, to wipe away my tears and kiss my forehead as if I were an exquisite treasure, that meant something to me.
I want to keep that.
I want to keep him for as long as he will allow it.
Perhaps I’m not the smartest girl in the world, but I’m not stupid enough to pass up what Julius makes me feel. And for once in my life, it’s good. Knowing that the unexplainable feeling is mutual is more than I could have imagined.
Now, as I avoid putting too much pressure on my still tender heel, Ling takes a seat at the bar, ordering drinks. I stand awkwardly by her side, and I just know she’s not going to offer me a seat, so I sit myself down beside her at the very moment the bartender places our drinks in front of us with a seductive smile.
When I dragged my ass out of bed and followed Ling to her room, she already had an outfit picked out for me. Wide-legged black pants with a tight black tank top and a beautifully intricate black lace wide-sleeved kimono-style cover that belted up around the waist. I picked up all the garments and moved to take them back to Julius’s room so I could change, when Ling yelled out, “I don’t bite, bitch.”
To that, I called out, “Sure you do,” and I stressed, “bitch.”
Her cackle sounded as I closed the door behind me.
Now, with my hair pulled up into a neat bun at the top of my head, completely makeup-free, I ignore the pounding in my temples and lift my drink to my mouth. The second I smell it, I wince and put it back down on the bar.
Ling, in her perfect red dress, with her perfect red pumps, and her perfect red lips fighting a pout, leans over. “What’s the problem?” The only imperfection on her is the white strap across the bridge of her still bruised nose. It looks so much better than it had the day before. It’s almost completely healed.
I shake my head and keep my eye on the bar. “It’s whiskey. I can’t drink whiskey.”
“God, you’re so fucking precious.” Her lips pucker in distaste, and she flips her dark, gorgeous, dead-straight hair over her shoulder, looking out into the crowd. “Order whatever the fuck you want then. Jeez.”
She signals the bartender, and I order a Cape Cod—more commonly known as a vodka cranberry—thanking him as he places the tall glass in front of me with a wink. I sip at the tart cocktail, and I salivate at the mild sweetness of the cranberry juice. I have a feeling I know the answer already, but I ask Ling, “Does Julius know we’re here?”
“No,” she responds immediately. “I was told to watch you.” She grins modestly. “He never said anything about not leaving the house.”
Oh, she thinks she’s so clever.
I stir my drink with my straw. “Is he going to be pissed?”
She turns to me slowly, throwing me a look that says ‘What do you think, genius?’
My shoulders slump, and I sigh quietly. “He’s going to be pissed.”
Crossing her leg over the other, she explains in a bored tone, “Julius is always pissed. There are just varying degrees of his pissiness. Some days, he’s less pissed than others. Besides, he doesn’t have to know. We’ll be back before he is.”
The need to ask questions is overwhelming. I do my best to come off inconspicuous, and pry where I shouldn’t. “Has he always been like that?”
Her brows narrow at me. “What makes you think I’ve known him that long?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug. “You guys have a comfortable familiarity thing going on. I just assumed—”
Ling cuts me off with a curious glance, leans over and stares down at my lips. “There could be other reasons for that familiarity, Alejandra,” she offers enticingly.
My heart sinks, and it does this so dramatically that my straw slips out of my fingers and falls onto the dirty floor.
Ling takes obvious pleasure in my reaction. Her eyes flash in accomplishment as she sips on her whiskey sour and says, “No, he hasn’t always been like that. Believe it or not, there was once a time when Julius smiled a whole fucking lot.”
My voice soft, I have to ask, “What happened?”
“He lost someone.” Her posture stiffens to project a certain gracefulness, but her eyes betray her sadness. “We lost someone.”
I can’t think of anything to say to that, so I simply nod in understanding. Suddenly, a thought crosses my mind, and I wonder…
Ling’s husky chuckle sounds, and she answers my silent thought. “No, sweetheart. I’ve always been like this.” She raises her glass to mine, clinks them in cheers and drinks, tipping her head back and downing the first drink, moving the one she ordered for me closer to her.
Minutes of silence pass, and having finished my first drink, Ling orders me a second. The alcohol loosens my taut shoulders, and with it, my tongue. “Have you ever been to jail, Ling?”
She snorts. “A pretty girl like me? Naw.” She smiles then, and I’m shocked to find it’s genuine. “Anyway, I’d just fuck my way out.”
A surprised laugh bubbles up my throat. “What about Julius?”
Her watchful eyes search me. “I shouldn’t tell you shit.” She tilts her head to the side and puckers her lips in thought. “But I suppose now that Julius is planning on keeping you, it changes things.”
My mouth gapes a little with that revelation.
He what now? Does that mean what I think it means?
The spark of hope I felt earlier ignites into a healthy flame and my heart warms.
“It’s all about us now.”
Is that what Julius meant? He wasn’t taking me back?
My mind implodes with the possibilities.
Ling has no idea of the shock she’s just dealt me and seeming to have a mental argument with herself, she straightens. “Meh, fuck it.” With her expression completely void, she utters, “Yes. Yes, he has. Spent all his teenage years locked away in juvie.”
It shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did. Eyes wide, I shuffled my stool closer to her. “What for?”
“Manslaughter. It was originally a murder charge, but his aunt got some fancy lawyer who managed to talk the charge down, saying he acted in self-defense.”
And my heart falls into the pit of my stomach.
Ling looks down at her drink a long moment. “If you caught your father raping your sister, what would you have done?”