“Can we go inside to talk?” she asks.
My heart fucking pounds. That's exactly where I want her, inside my cabin.
Once inside the warm cabin, we take off our boots and our coats. I stoke the fire and make sure it's blazing. I know my place is small, but right now it feels cozy. Soon enough, I'll put the Christmas tree in the corner, put on some music and it'll be a damn holiday.
“I really like your place,” she says, surprising me.
“Yeah? Not too small?”
“No, I like it. It looks and smells and feels like you. And I like that. I love that,” she says then, reaching for my hands as she keeps talking. With her small, soft hand in my palm, I can feel myself relax. I haven’t lost the girl. She’s still here, close enough to kiss. “I know I messed up,” she says. “I didn't know how to tell you. I've made a really big mess of my life. The last seven months have been about trying to fix what Granny ruined.”
I frown. “What'd your granny do?”
Maple exhales, and we walk to the couch where she begins to lay it all out there for me. The more she talks, the bigger of an ass I feel for yelling at her yesterday. For going off in a huff and leaving her all alone.
“I didn't realize the money was so bad,” she says. “That she'd run out of my grandpa's life insurance policy. She had been funding the kitchen with it for all those years. And when I took over seven months ago, I just kind of kept doing what she'd been doing, not realizing the debt I was taking on. Granny was skipping payments, not paying her own mortgage and bills to make sure the soup kitchen was covered. And it's so lovely. The gesture. Her intentions were so pure, but…”
“Pure intentions don't always matter when it comes to bureaucracy,” I add.
She nods, wiping the tears from her eyes. “Exactly.”
“I know all about good intentions gone awry.”
“What do you mean?” she asks.
“Oh, I was just planning on building a strip mall in Snowy Valley, thinking it could bring in some more business. Asher Martin and the rest of the council turned me down.”
“You wanted to build a strip mall?”
“I wanted to build a little shopping village. I thought maybe they could put in a store with Christmas decorations in it or some shit. I don't know. I was thinking of the economy and of giving more people jobs here. I know there are lots of people struggling and I thought maybe this could help.”
“That's really good of you. I had no idea you had that kind of aspiration.”
“What’d you think? I'm just some asshole who lives up in the woods by myself?”
She laughs. “I didn't say that. But you do keep to yourself.”
“I’ve never had much luck with people.” Maple places her hands on mine and we lean closer to one another on the couch. “Anyway, Asher vetoed my plan.”
Maple groans. “Well, the city vetoed my grant proposal too. It’s like the council only cares about their agenda. I hate it. Snowy Valley has been my home for as long as I can remember, but it really sucks how bureaucracy gets in the way of everything that could be good. Everything that could be great.”
“So, that’s why you have to sell the house and close the soup kitchen?” I ask, her explanation making sense, even if it’s painful. “That's a lot on one person's shoulders.”
She shakes her head as tears fall down her cheeks. “I didn't know how to tell you. I'm so embarrassed. I've always been the person who has my act together, my life together. Like you've mentioned a thousand times, I was on the cheerleading team and was the prom queen and I went to college and got my degree, a degree in public relations. What is that gonna do for me when I can't even keep my house? I think I'll get enough from the sale of the house to get an apartment in town, but that’s the extent of my plans.” Her breath is shaky as she finishes.
“Hey, hey. One thing at a time, Maple, One thing at a time.”
The words seem to calm her a bit, and she squeezes my hand, not wanting to let me go. “One bright spot was Isaiah and Jody,” she says, wiping her eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, they are throwing this big fundraiser on New Year's Eve to save the kitchen. Apparently, they think I've been stubborn and that it runs in my family. They think that if I had asked for help, or if Granny had asked for help a long time ago, we wouldn't be in this position.”
“So, you're learning to open up and say what you need?”