Way she wanted to be.
No.
I didn’t know her.
But like I’d told her, she was easy to read.
She cast a gentle smile. “I guess it makes me a fool that I wish you were, too.”
I gave a tight nod. “Lock this door behind me.”
Because God knew I wasn’t the only monster roaming this place.FourLeif“Holy shit, it’s the Leif Godwin, in the flesh.” Ash Evans, Sunder’s bassist, pulled me in for a tight hug the second I walked through the door.
The office was tucked at the end of a cavernous hall, the walls made up of ornate dark woods and the ceilings adorned with heavy crown molding where it cut through a private wing on the first floor. Sounds of the party echoed through the thick walls and vibrated the floors, strains of music filtering to our ears.
Shocks of laughter spiked through the middle of it.
Vibe was different here than when I’d been hiding out upstairs, though.
Up in that attic, it was like I hadn’t been a part of the chaos roaring through the house.
Like I’d gotten lost and had fallen into a dream.
Hallucinating.
Had to have been.
That girl’s stunning face strobed through my mind, the feel of her tight, sweet body against mine still lingering on my flesh, the scent of her still overwhelming and flooding my senses.
Cocoa and cream.
Fuck. I had to have been dreaming. Losing my mind. Losing my grip on reality.
Ash clapped me on the shoulder before he edged back, but he only stepped far enough away so he could grab me by the upper arms, like some kind of old aunt who hadn’t seen their nephew in twenty years and was wanting to get a good look.
If I wasn’t careful, asshole was liable to pinch my cheeks.
“Dude, how the hell have you been?” he asked. “Haven’t seen you in years.”
“Can’t complain,” I told him, fighting the rush of unease.
Fuck, what was I thinking, coming here? Could feel two worlds getting ready to collide.
“It’s been too damned long.” Could see the undercurrent of amusement riding through his expression, like he was all the way back to those days when our paths had first crossed. Back when Sunder hadn’t yet been discovered, and I was still banging away with a heavy metal band in the slums of L.A.
Wishing I was different then, too. Faking a life. Pretending to be someone I was not. I hadn’t known them all that well considering I never allowed myself to get too close.
Too involved.
A philosophy I’d applied to everything.
Until I’d fucked up worse than ever before.
Taken what never should have been mine.
Selfish.
Disgust swilled and warbled, and I pinned on a fake smile, convincing myself to sit tight and not bolt out the door.
Apparently, being in Los Angeles was fucking with my brain.
“Years,” I told him.
“You haven’t aged a day.” He patted my cheek, grinning like an asshole, sarcasm riding free.
“Fuck you, old man,” I said with a laugh. “Last I checked, you were older than me.”
Truth was, he looked better than he had back in the day. Healthier. Happier. Whole ton sappier, too. Guessed that was what love and marriage and all that bullshit did to you.
Didn’t negate the fact the guy was a badass.
A legend.
I mean, fuck, I was in a room full of them.
I let my gaze slide across the faces filling the posh office. Room decorated with oversized, dark furniture. The entirety of Sunder had gathered there and were waiting for me while the party raged in the main rooms of the house.
Sebastian Stone, or Baz, like everyone called him, and his younger brother, Austin.
Ash Evans.
Zachary Kennedy.
Last but not least, Lyrik West. My chest tightened when my attention landed on the guy, wondering what this was and what I’d gotten myself into.
I lifted my chin in a casual gesture. “What’s up?”
Lyrik pushed to standing from where he was sitting on the edge of the desk. “Glad you could make it on such short notice.”
He shook my hand and pulled me in for a clap to the shoulder. “It’s good to see you.”
“You, too. So, what was so important that you needed to get me out to L.A.?”
Couldn’t imagine my invite to this party came without ulterior motives. Not to mention the fact they’d sent a private jet to South Carolina to get me and had a chauffeur waiting to pick me up at the airport.
Pretty damned sure they wanted something out of this.
Lyrik angled his head to an empty chair. I took it, started drumming my fingers on the top of my thigh because I didn’t know much of anything else.
Sunder’s drummer, Zachary, better known as Zee, stood up from where he was hunkered in the corner. “Saw you playing with your band back in Savannah a couple months ago.”
I itched, glancing around, nothing but eyes on me. Whole point of taking up as the drummer of an unknown country band that only played dives in the south was the fact that no one would notice me. That I’d be an ocean away from those who might recognize me.