He halted a few paces away from her. The anger in his eyes suddenly died, but the expression that replaced it was even worse. It was a deadening of all emotion, until he was simply a blank.
‘You realise I can’t trust a word you say,’ he said quietly, his words striking like mortal blows. ‘And I will never be able to.’
CHAPTER TWELVE
‘I don’t want to leave.’
JASPER WAS MAKING a muddy track as he paced back and forth on the wet lawn. Tomas bit back his anger as he stalked up to him. He’d had to get away from Zara. He needed to get away from them both.
‘Don’t be angry with her,’ Jasper said as soon as he saw Tomas walking towards him. ‘It was my idea. She didn’t know any of it.’
‘Didn’t know she was my wife?’
As if he could believe that.
‘Not until the day she got here, no.’ Jasper puffed out a breath. ‘She thought the annulment had gone through a year ago. I didn’t tell her about the amnesia when I met her again. I’d hoped your seeing her might jolt your memory.’
‘Why would that happen when I’d spent only a day in her presence?’ It was preposterous.
Jasper ran his hand through his hair and coughed. ‘Because...’
‘Because what?’
‘You married her, for God’s sake,’ he muttered. ‘You, who never dated anyone for more than a month or so, took one look at this little mouse and married her. I was gobsmacked.’
‘Apparently it was to help her.’
‘It was.’ Jasper nodded. ‘And she needed it. But there was more to it than that.’
‘What?’
‘I saw the way you kissed her.’
Tomas’s eyes narrowed. He hadn’t kissed Zara since Jasper had arrived this morning. ‘When did you see that?’ He straightened. ‘When I was allowed to “kiss the bride”?’ It would have been for show.’
Jasper shook his head. ‘You didn’t kiss at the ceremony. It was afterwards. When you went to say goodbye to her. I was along the hallway and you...’
‘What?’
‘It was...’ Jasper cleared his throat awkwardly. ‘That’s why when I found her I sent her to you. She’s the only person you’ve ever reacted to in that way. You kissed her. Hell, you kissed her like—’
‘You forget yourself,’ Tomas snapped. ‘You’re my lawyer, not my friend. Stay out of my personal life, Jasper. Never, ever interfere like this again. Be very grateful you’ve not been sacked this second.’
‘You asked me to hold off on filing the annulment papers,’ Jasper said quickly. ‘I don’t know why, but you did. We went to Paris for your next series of meetings and then the accident happened.’ Jasper lifted his hands in a helpless gesture.
And it was helpless; he was hopeless. He could never know the truth for certain. He could never trust her.
Tomas went back indoors and took the stairs two at a time. He needed them both gone from his home.
Now.
* * *
There was a wildness in his eyes but every movement was so controlled, he was like burning ice. Zara rubbed her arms as she watched him coolly sign the annulment papers.
He didn’t speak, he didn’t look at her. Just through her.
Destroyed inside, she followed his lead and signed, then dated the papers. She needed to talk to him again, to try to make him understand, but he wasn’t going to give her that chance.
‘I can give you a ride somewhere if you’d like me to, Zara?’ Jasper stood with his back to Tomas, as if he knew he was risking the wrath of his employer.
‘My car—’
‘Is in the village,’ Tomas interrupted. ‘It’s been fixed. Jasper can drop you off and you can pick it up on your way through. It’s been paid for.’ He glanced at his desk. ‘The Kilpatricks don’t get back until Tuesday but I think I can cope alone for a couple of days.’
Zara winced; could he sound any more sarcastic?
‘Is that okay with you, Zara?’ Jasper asked.
She tried to hide her tumbling emotions. The older man was concerned, so she smiled. ‘I think it’s a good idea.’
She wanted time to talk to Tomas. To make him understand. But he wasn’t allowing that. He was sending her away.
‘You’d better pack,’ Tomas muttered in her direction without looking at her. ‘And you concentrate on getting those papers filed as quickly as possible,’ he ordered Jasper. ‘Leave everything else for me to sort out.’
He didn’t speak to her again.
It took less than five minutes for her to put her clothes into her bag. She was so very cold. So hurt. And hopeless.
Tomas stood in the doorway, a forbidding expression on his face as he watched Jasper get into his car. She saw no way of breaking through to him.
She gazed up at him, at an even greater disadvantage height wise because she was on the lower step, trying not to slip in the melting snow.
But she had to take one last chance. One last risk.
‘I don’t want to leave,’ she pleaded softly.
Finally he turned and looked directly at her, that dead look still dulling his expression. ‘If you stayed, it would only be to have sex and I don’t want you any more.’
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
It was always going to be just out of reach.
TOMAS COULDN’T BELIEVE the day had ended so horrendously.
For the first time since the accident he’d woken up happy. Yes, he’d had that moment when he’d remembered what he’d lost, but then he’d opened his eyes and looked straight into hers.
It wasn’t just his body that had responded. His very soul had lifted. The loss had diminished, ebbing away like a gentle tide and taking the usual frustration and bitterness with it. It hadn’t mattered because she’d been by his side. She’d smiled at him, her eyes luminous and—he’d thought—loving.
Waking up next to her had been the best moment of his life in so very long. He’d actually dared to think he might have found something he’d not thought possible. He’d thought he could hold onto it.
But it was all a charade.
She’d fooled herself into thinking she was in love with him. It was some hideous mix of pity and gratitude. And, yes, sexual attraction.
But not love.
It was as if the sweetest of cakes had crumbled to ash in his mouth.
And as for the veracity of her tale? He could well believe he’d played the hero in a moment of madness—one look into those dreamy eyes and he’d have done almost anything she’d asked.
But he was damned if he was going to shackle her to him and a life of servitude that she’d really only just escaped. She’d done nice things for him because it was how she could show her appreciation. All those touches had been about saying thank you, more than anything else.
It hurt. He felt like a damned fool. A weak, vulnerable idiot.
Well, no more of that. He’d get back to work. Properly focus. Keep the company pushing forward.
He’d forget all about her.
But in the cruellest irony of all, his brain refused to block the memory of her with him. All he could think about was Zara. All he could see was the devastated expression in her eyes when he’d rejected her.
When he’d banished her.
He closed his eyes and willed himself to move forward. To concentrate. To do anything but ruminate over the last few days events. But it was futile. Time and time again his thoughts turned to her.
And the ache in his chest?
He pushed through, determinedly firing off email after email. Demanding reports come back to him sooner. Researching to find a new trend. Anything to occupy his mind.
It was almost midnight when he stalked into his room and slammed the door shut. Thank heavens he hadn’t taken her into his own bed and tainted it with memories of her there.
But he couldn’t sleep. At who knew what hour he found himself walking back down the corridor, to the room she’d slept in and walking into it. There was barely a sign of her pres