“No, it’s fine. You were completely upfront with me from the very start. We don’t have to have a heart-to-heart. You said it clearly tonight. Your life is there. My life is here. It’s over. Ended.” She got to her home and realized she didn’t have her key.
“I want us to talk,” Rix said.
“There’s nothing for us to talk about. It’s over. Give me my key.”
He hesitated but she held her hand out, waiting.
“We’ll talk when you’re willing to listen.” He put her key into the palm of her hand. She let herself inside, slammed the door, locked it, and collapsed against it. This wasn’t how she wanted tonight to go. Putting her hand to her stomach, she felt so empty, broken, and alone.
****
Seeing the capo die should have been a wonderful experience.
Rix had killed his fair share of men and women.
Revenge, justice, and completion. The capo’s death should have completed all of them, but as he sat in the main clubhouse, with his boys all celebrating his return and their victory, he was hollow.
He hadn’t told Anna-Beth she was pregnant with his child.
He hadn’t told her he loved her.
The night he came to show her his home, he’d hoped to have at least piqued her curiosity. Instead, she’d gotten angry and pushed him away. If she hadn’t been pregnant, he would have forced her to see reason, but she was in a delicate condition and everything he’d read told him to treat her with care. He’d never gotten a woman pregnant before.
Women were dancing. Enjoying in the merriment. He couldn’t participate.
Getting to his feet, without a word, he let himself into his office. Night told him no one had visited this room. They were all waiting for his return. His boys didn’t want anyone else to take it from him.
“Is there a reason you’re acting all pissed?” Night said. “We got it, we won. You should be celebrating.”
“I am.”
“No, you’re sitting in your office. There’s so much pussy out there for you to try.”
“Pussy,” he said. In his mind, he thought about Anna-Beth. Her smile. The sweetness of her wrapped around him.
“What’s going on?”
“Leave me in peace for tonight.”
“Is this about your neighbor chick? It’s over. Forget about her. There are plenty of bitches here to keep you occupied. You don’t have to even think of her.”
He turned to look at his friend. “We’ve been doing this a lot of years. Had a lot of pussy join the club. Party.”
“Yeah, it’s what we love.”
“What if I don’t want it anymore?”
“The club?” Night asked.
“No, the women.”
“You’re thinking of giving up on the women? What the fuck for? For a piece of ass that is like every single piece of ass?”
He grabbed a paperweight and launched it across the room. “Enough! Anna-Beth is more than a piece of fucking ass. She’s not some slut who has worked her way around the club and is after some bonus points when she sleeps with me. Fuck! I don’t even know why I’m talking to you about this. From day one, you haven’t been able to stand her.”
Night’s jaw clenched. “I get it. She’s different. She’s not like the women. She’s special. Rix, she’s not club. We looked into her, remember? She was raised to be a good little girl, to do her nine-to-five job, without any question. She won’t fit in here.”
“She’s pregnant with my child, Night. I don’t even know if she knows. Each morning she’s throwing up her guts, by dinner, she’s ravenous. Can’t get enough.”
“Oh, shit,” Night said.
“You know, it’s the weirdest thing. I mean, before I even stepped foot in that fucking house, I caught sight of her. I bought that place before I even knew what it looked like, and I wanted her. The two houses are supposed to be fucking cursed.” He ran a hand down his face. “I’m starting to believe they are.”
“You’re not making any sense.”
“Of course I’m not. You don’t get it. I’m in love with this woman, Night. I thought being here, getting my revenge, having justice served, it would right this wrong. But I created another. I wanted her to get pregnant. I went out of my way to make sure she’d be mine.” He looked back out of the window. “Now I don’t know how to make it right.”
She was hurting. He got it.
Night cleared his throat. “I apologize.”
He turned back to his friend, who’d taken a seat. His hands were locked together in front of him. “I don’t do the whole shit with relationships. You know this club is my life. It’s all I care about.”
“I know.”
Night glanced around the office. “All I wanted was for you to get your rightful place here.”
“I’m here.”
“But you need her, don’t you? To make this work, you need her and nothing else is ever going to be as good if you don’t have her.”