I swallowed, feeling the fire behind his words. Feeling an equal amount of fear because danger was something I usually ran from. Battles existed in movies.
I couldn’t help feeling curious about that magic, though. I wondered what I’d be able to do with it. And as for the darkness tinging it…
Captain America was able to stay himself after the transformation. She-Ra. Batman—his past made him unhinged, not the suit. I could think of plenty of imaginary people who’d made sudden powers work for them. Given what I now knew, it wasn’t too farfetched to assume those characters were based on real people.
“I’ll let you think about it,” Austin said, standing. “I will support whatever you choose. That hasn’t changed. But realize that if you stay in that house, you are painting a target on your back. What happened tonight should tell you that much. If you stay, you will have to fight. If you do not want to fight, you have to leave.”
If I stayed, the house would need to make me its chosen.Twenty-Seven“Here’s the thing.” I edged into the little cabin as the sun climbed in the sky. I’d sat in that chair, looking out at the lake, poring over every detail. Thinking through the possible paths I could take. I’d called my son and teared up when he said he loved me. I’d called my ex-husband, and grinned when he sounded annoyed.
And here I was, on the doorstep of a terrible idea.
The group sat around a tiny table just off the little kitchen, all of them looking at me expectantly.
“Do I have to have the wings?” I asked. Call it vanity, but I didn’t want to walk around with a cape the rest of my life. It was a sticking point, and I said as much.
Mr. Tom’s nostrils flared. “It is not a cape, firstly, and it is an incredible honor to—”
“Would ya stop?” Niamh asked him. “They look ridiculous. You must know that.” She shook her head at me. “The females of the species have smaller and more delicate wings that retract. Females don’t shift, either. Battling in the sky won’t be your forte, but the gargoyles you call to you will handle that. Your wings will only show when you actually need to use them.”
“Oh.” That was okay then. “So how do we do this?”
“Austin and I can clear a path into the house,” Niamh said. “Once in the house, you can find your way to—”
“No!” Mr. Tom put out his hands.
“I was goin’ta say the magic, you donkey,” she clapped back. “Jaysus, Mary, and Joseph, why for all that is holy did that house pick you?”
“Oh yes, because a rock-toting, one mammary gland crusader makes all the sense in the world,” Mr. Tom bit back.
“Enough,” Austin said, and the power crackling through that word produced instant silence. He ran his fingers through his hair. “This is our crew. This is what we’ve got. Jess, does this mean you’ve decided to fight for that house?”
“Yes. I want to secure the house. I don’t want to be chased away from the life I’ve chosen. I want to fight.”
He inclined his head. “And you’re ready to claim the magic?”
“Mostly. I just wish I could pick and choose which elements to accept. It felt a little dark—I’m worried it’ll change me into something I’m not.”
“You’re strong of will, Jacinta,” Mr. Tom said, nodding at me supportively. “Certain things, like the wings, are a given, but if you hold on to who you are, no magic can change that.”
I dragged my teeth over my bottom lip. “And if you’re not really certain about the…who you are part?”
“You’re certain,” Austin said, and even though the others were right there, it felt like he was saying it for my ears alone. “You know who you are, and you know what you want, or you wouldn’t be standing here, trying to barter your way into something most of the magical world would kill for. I don’t know what in the past made you question yourself, but maybe it was for the best. It made you who you are. The second I met you, I could tell you had your eyes wide open. You were ready for life to come at you. All you need now is to find your confidence, and you’ll be unstoppable.”
The others nodded their heads in agreement.
The weight of indecision and self-doubt evaporated from my shoulders, making me feel lighter. I’d never really been supported like this in my adult life—I’d always fallen into the supportive role. So I hadn’t realized how much it helped. How good it felt to have the people around me lift me up when life was trying to batter me down. No wonder my ex had hit such professional heights—he’d always had a champion in his corner. I now wished I’d relied on true friends like Diana a lot more.