“I guess I was just old-fashioned and felt like the girl shouldn’t make a move. I even once told Rory I had a crush on you.” I laughed a little, recalling the time I admitted my crush on Channing to the guy who would eventually become my boyfriend.
Channing suddenly moved his hand off my hip. “You what?”
“Before he and I got together, I once told Rory that I liked you. It’s funny to think about that now, considering how things turned out.”
“What exactly did he say to that when you told him?”
I wasn’t sure whether to admit it. “He told me to be careful of you, that you’d hurt me.”
“Really…” His eyes narrowed “When was that? The conversation?”
He was upset.
I scratched my head in an attempt to remember. “Probably shortly before you left for UF.”
Channing suddenly sat up against the headboard. My revelation really seemed to piss him off. I could understand why he’d be mad. But I figured he’d understand why Rory would have warned me against him. Channing never hid his philandering ways back then. Rory was his friend, but at the time, Channing was a player. That was undeniable. Rory thought he was just looking out for my best interests.
When he continued not to say anything, I asked, “Are you okay?”CHAPTER THIRTEEN* * *CHANNING“Channing?”
Now was not the time to go ape shit. But suddenly, I was eighteen again. I never intended to admit anything to Amber about Rory’s and my pact. But hearing what he’d told her was completely jarring. It felt like steam was coming out of my ears. I was ready to blow.
He knew how I’d felt about her back then.
He knew that despite my actions when it came to other girls, that Amber was different.
And now I’d learned that he knew she had feelings for me before he pursued her.
She could tell my head wasn’t right. “Channing, what’s wrong?”
“It doesn’t matter now. It’s old news.”
“What doesn’t matter?”
“The fact that your ex is a lying douchebag.”
“Because of what he said about you?”
My eyes darted to the side to meet hers. “He knew how I felt about you.”
She was blinking repeatedly, looking totally confused. “What do you mean?”
Here goes nothing.
“Rory and I both wanted you, Amber. About a year before I left for college, he came to me and told me he wanted to ask you out. I felt compelled to tell him that I had feelings for you, too. At the time, we decided that for the betterment of our friendship, that neither one of us would pursue you. We made a deal, one he broke as soon as I left for UF.”
She covered her mouth. “Oh, my God. I obviously had no idea about this.”
“No, of course you didn’t. You were never supposed to know, but you bet your ass that if you had come to me and told me that you had feelings for him, I would’ve told him about that. I would’ve abolished that fucking pact if it meant making you happy. Instead, when you went to him about me, he did nothing but warn you against me, so that he could move in on you when I left.”
She stared off, looking like she was trying to make sense of my revelation. “So, when you came back from UF, Rory and I were together…you were different toward us. That’s because…”
“I was devastated. Yeah. I was crushed to see you two together.”
“Oh, my God, Channing. I had no clue. None.”
“I know that. Why would you?”
“I’d based my opinion of you largely on those years after you came home from UF. You always got around, but you just seemed out of control when you came back. I watched your actions and judged you based on them. I never imagined resentment was at the root of it.”
Letting out an angry laugh, I said, “I hooked up with all of your friends to get back at you, even though you didn’t even do anything wrong. Real mature, right?”
“I kind of hated you in college,” she said.
“The feeling was mutual, Amber. I kind of hated you for a while, too, until I wised up and realized that if you were happy—really happy with him—then that was all that mattered.”
“Wow.”
I couldn’t believe I’d let my emotions get the best of me.
Calm the fuck down, Channing.
I chuckled. “Well, so much for just sex tonight, huh?” I’d virtually ruined our evening by bringing the past into this hotel room and throwing a tantrum. It wasn’t until this moment that I realized just how much bitterness I was still harboring even after all these years.
She placed her hand on my cheek, and I closed my eyes to relish her touch.
“I’m glad you told me, Channing. I mean, I know it doesn’t change anything between us now. But it was a part of the past that I was apparently blind to.”