Hollis glanced over at me, and it gave me chills when he muttered under his breath, “Elodie is definitely a NILF.”***“This is me.” I pointed to my little house, and Hollis pulled to the curb.
He put the car in park and looked around. “There’s really not much going on out here. I wouldn’t have taken you for a country girl.”
“I’m not. I’m originally from Queens. I moved out here when I married Tobias. He wanted to get out of the city, and his dad had just retired and moved to a new fifty-five-and-over community nearby. He liked the area, so we rented this little bungalow to give it a shot. Except our lease lasted longer than the marriage.”
“But you stayed.”
I shrugged. “I like being closer to nature. Although lately I’ve been missing the city, and living there would certainly be more convenient.”
“Why don’t you move back?”
“My best friend lives next door. She’s actually my ex-husband’s stepsister. That’s how we met. But Bree’s…not well. She has a lung disease that makes it difficult for her to get around too much. So I want to stay close to help out, even though she doesn’t actually let me help very much.”
Hollis stared at me funny. “That’s very nice of you.”
“Not really. She’s also my unofficial psychologist and has put up with me the last few years. I think I need her for my mental wellbeing more than she needs me for any physical assistance. In fact, if it weren’t for her, we wouldn’t have met.”
His brows drew together. “How so?”
“Bree saw your ad for a nanny somewhere and encouraged me to apply. She hated my job with Soren.”
Hailey had laid down in the back seat a few minutes after we got on the road. The last day of school and a pool party had really knocked her out. But she suddenly sat up and stretched. “I need to take a whiz.”
“Hailey, don’t talk like that,” Hollis snapped.
“Like what?”
“Taking a whiz. That’s about as classy as a woman saying she needs to take a piss.”
“But I do need to take a piss. What would you like me to say?”
I turned and intervened. “Hailey, honey, I think your uncle prefers if you say you have to go to the bathroom…or the ladies’ room. Whiz and piss are a bit crass, even for me.”
“So I can’t use certain words, but Uncle Hollis gets to say whatever he wants?”
Hollis said Yes at the exact same time I said No. I’d been about to explain that wasn’t what he was saying, but Hollis nipped that in the bud by talking over me.
“I’m an adult,” he bit back.
“So when I’m an adult, it’s fine to use whiz and piss?”
“No, because when you’re an adult, you’ll be a lady.”
“Maybe I don’t want to be a lady.”
“Hailey, don’t push my buttons.”
I almost laughed. That was exactly what she was doing. I knew what that looked like because I liked to do it, too.
“Why don’t we go inside my house so you can use the bathroom, Hailey?”
“Okay!” She whipped open the back door and jumped out.
I looked over at Hollis. “Would you like to come in and take a whiz before getting on the road, too?”
He narrowed his eyes. “The two of you are going to drive me to drink.”
Inside the house, I showed Hailey where the main bathroom was and then led Hollis into the bathroom off my bedroom. When I flicked on the light, I realized I had all of my underwear and bras hanging over the shower curtain. This morning I’d hand-washed things that didn’t go in the washing machine.
Hollis froze.
“They’re underwear. They won’t bite. You’ll be safe for your whiz.”
He mumbled something under his breath and shut the door behind him. I went to wait for Hailey in the kitchen.
She came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, sniffing her hands. “What kind of soap is in there? It smells so good.”
“It’s lavender. I’ll pick you up some the next time I go to Bath & Body Works.”
“Thanks.” She pulled out a stool that had been tucked under the kitchen counter and made herself at home. “I like the painting in the bathroom, too. It’s sort of creepy, but pretty at the same time.”
I smiled. “Thank you. I painted it.”
Her eyes widened. “You did?”
“Yup.”
“Wow. Can you teach me how to paint like that?”
“I could teach you some techniques. Sure.” I opened the refrigerator. “Do you want something to drink before you head back to the city?”
She shook her head. “No, thanks. It’ll just make me have to go to the bathroom.”
I heard Hollis’s voice before I saw him. “So you’re capable of using the word bathroom for Elodie.”
Hailey turned to look at her uncle, then completely ignored him and looked back at me. “Do you have more of your art anywhere?”