BJ stands still. Like a bull readying itself for a matador. He doesn’t move a muscle. And suddenly I know what he is going to do. It’s the oddest thing, but I do. He is going to land the punch that puts The Devil’s Hammer to sleep. At the exact moment, as The Devil’s Hammer prepares to throw his own punch, I open my mouth, and with all the power in my lungs, scream BJ’s name.
‘BILLY JOE PILKINGTON.’
Every person in the barn turns startled eyes in my direction. But my eyes are on BJ. He has turned towards my voice, an expression of total incomprehension on his face. I am the last person in the world he expects to see. His eyes find me and he looks as if he has seen a ghost. The Devil’s Hammer’s punch lands. It socks him in the face. A direct hit. The momentum causes BJ to stagger back slightly. His eyes rush away from me. When he straightens, he is an avenging angel.
He is so furious he looks as if he wants to tear the other man’s head off. BJ pummels his opponent with such barbaric brutality that I have to close my eyes. I hear the dull thud of the man falling, then the crowd going crazy. I feel hot and claustrophobic. My heart is beating too fast. I turn towards Ria.
She looks at me strangely. ‘Congratulations,’ she says. ‘You won your bet.’
I nod. People are giving me sidelong glances. I’ve made a spectacle of myself, but I don’t feel embarrassed. In fact, I feel oddly detached. I think I am shocked at myself. At the harm I have caused to another. I have never harmed another human being before. I even hate it when I accidentally snap an insect or a frog in the garden with my hoe.
‘Can I borrow a cigarette?’ I ask Ria.
‘Sure.’ She gives me a packet. ‘The lighter is inside,’ she says.
‘Thanks,’ I say with a tense smile, and pushing my way out of the barn, go outside. It is freezing. I don’t normally smoke, but I feel jittery. Even my hands are shaking. I walk to the side of the barn and light a cigarette. I have taken only one puff when I feel the air around me change. Become thicker. I turn my head slowly. Our eyes touch.
‘Are we quits now?’ BJ asks.
His left cheekbone is badly swollen and starting to discolor. I turn away from his cold, cold eyes. I feel raw. ‘Yeah, we’re quits.’
‘Can I have one?’
I fit my cigarette between my lips and hold open the cigarette packet. He takes one. There is blood on his hand.
‘Does it hurt?’ I ask.
‘No.’
‘Why not?’
‘I’m buzzing.’
I flick open the lighter and hold the flame up to him. My hand is shaking. His other hand comes up to cup the flame. In the intimate glow, I see the heat rise from his skin like steam. And I smell the sweat and the trace of endorphins and adrenaline radiating from it. Our eyes meet again and we stare at each other. Yes, I am shocked, and yes, I am shaken, but there is something else struggling to show its face. He inhales, the cigarette burns orange, and I kill the flame with a click.
I turn away, dropping the lighter back into the packet. I return my forefinger and middle finger back on either side of my cigarette and inhale a lungful of warm smoke. It makes me feel light-headed. I exhale it out slowly and put my hand down to the side of my body. There is a foot between us, and an unmistakable element of danger. Like being on one of those roller coasters that inverts you. You are scared to death and unbelievably excited at the same time.
I grasp that I’m not only aroused by the violence I witnessed in the pit, I am excited by the tightly packed, rippling muscles of his body. He is giving off vibes that are calling to me. My life-long hatred of him seems to belong to another place and time. By a strange trick of the light it has morphed into an intense desire to meld my body with his. Shocked by that realization and super aware of him, I carry on staring out into the empty frozen fields.
He doesn’t say a word and neither do I. There is nothing to say. Words are superfluous in the wake of the thick, sexual tension crackling like electricity between our bodies.
Suddenly Ria is calling me. ‘There you are. I’ve been looking for you.’
I let the butt of my cigarette drop to the ground and grind it with my foot. I hand her the packet. ‘Thanks.’
BJ flicks the end of his cigarette away from him.
‘Hey Ria,’ he says quietly.
‘That was a great fight,’ Ria says.
‘Thanks,’ he says devoid of any emotion. As if he is totally unaffected by her compliment.
My phone rings. I take it out of my purse. Shit. It is my mother. I consider not taking the call, but I know what she’s like. She will persist and persist until she gets me.
‘Hi Ma.’ My eyes flick over to BJ. He is watching me intently.
‘Where are you?’ she asks.
I gaze down at the frozen ground. ‘I’m with Ria,’ I reply. I don’t dare tell her where I am. I know she won’t approve. She’ll probably tell Jake and he’ll go mad.
‘Right. Can you be home in an hour?’
‘I guess so. Why?’
‘Shane’s coming around to your place. I’ve sent some food for you.’
‘Oh, OK.’
‘Call me when you get home, OK?’
‘Will do.’
‘But call Shane first,’ she says, and rings off.
I put my phone back into my purse and look up at Ria imploringly. ‘I’m sorry, but I’ve got to get home. My ma is sending my brother around to my place in an hour.’
‘Blimey,’ Ria says, widening her eyes. ‘You better call him and make it an hour and a half.’ She turns towards BJ. ‘I’ll see you this weekend then.’
He nods and looks at me.
‘Bye,’ I say awkwardly.
Then we are hurrying back into the barn in search of the guy we placed our bets with.
ELEVEN
Layla
Saturday. It takes forever to come, but when it does it brings a hard, tight knot into my stomach.
I know Ria and all her mates will dress to kill, so I take a long time getting ready. I soak in the bath for almost an hour with my mother’s secret homemade masque recipe on my face and another of her concoctions in my hair. She claims it’s guaranteed to make my hair shine. My mother’s potions do a good job, my skin is glowing and my hair glossy and shiny.
I wear my white mini dress. It is sleeveless with a high Nehru collar, but what makes it daring without being slutty is a five-inch long oval cutout in the middle of the dress that reveals my nicely tanned torso and belly button. I stick a red beret on my head and slide into a pair of knee length, white suede peep-toe boots that were all the rage a few months ago in Italy.
I stand in front of the mirror and I know I look good. My thoughts go to that moment when BJ bent his head to me and we shared a flame. Unconsciously, my finger slowly circles my bare belly.
Laissez-faire is a cavernous, totally modern nightclub with under-flooring lights that flash blue and white and gleaming metal structures on the walls and pillars. Ria is having her party in the VIP area upstairs. As soon as I enter the cordoned off area, she runs towards me.
‘Oh! My! God!’ she screams. ‘You look awesome, babe. I LOVE your boots.’
She looks glamorous in a red cowboy hat with a rhinestone band, a tight red and black striped dress, and the highest boots I have seen outside of a fashion magazine. The lights pick up the glitter on her lovely brown skin.
‘Well, you look absolutely stunning yourself,’ I tell her sincerely.
She flicks her long, summer-streaked hair. ‘You bet I do.’
I smile. None of that false modesty for Ria. I hold out her present, a pretty chain belt I bought in Milan. ‘Happy Birthday, Ria.’
She takes it, beaming. ‘Thanks. Come on. Let’s get you a drink.’ She winks at me. ‘We’re drinking champagne. BJ said we could have anything we wanted, so we ordered bubbly, but we didn’t go overboard and get the really expensive stuff though,’ she tells me chattily as we cross the room for the bar.
We are halfway there when Ria’s
favorite song, Justin Timberlake’s Sexy Back, comes on. With a shout of pure joy she puts her present on the floor, and gyrates provocatively around me. With a laugh I give in. We start bumping hips, twerking comically, and dancing around my present like two demented teenagers. Soon her other friends come onto the floor to join us.
When the song is over, Ria takes my hand and we attempt to continue our journey to the bar, but All About That Bass comes on and I love that song. I swing her around and we are at it again.
Laughing and breathless, we reach the bar five songs later. No sooner have we had a sip of our champagne than another of my favorite tracks comes on. Five of us girls rush off to the dance floor and give it all we’ve got.
The hours pass fast. The music is good and Ria is a great laugh.
It’s almost midnight. I know because the girl next to me is whispering that there is a surprise cake to be cut at the exact stroke of twelve. I am sitting at the table with Ria, feeling relaxed and merry when the air shifts. I look up and BJ is standing over us, looming even bigger and broader than I remember. He is wearing a khaki t-shirt tight enough to show off his impressive muscles and the V of his torso. His jeans hang low on his hips.