“Cooper.” I move up her body and stare down at her. Her green eyes are bright, and she has a dopey satisfied look on her face. My chest swells, knowing I’m the one responsible for it. She gives me a lazy grin, lifting her head and pressing her lips to mine.
The alcohol on her breath is just another reminder that this is wrong.
“What’s wrong?” she asks, pulling away.
“Nothing.” I smile, trying to hide my panic, but Reese sees right through me.
“You regret it.” It’s not a question but a statement.
“No. I could never regret any amount of time spent with you.” That’s the truth. I don’t regret it, but I’m scared as hell that I’m going to lose her. I don’t ever want to know what a life without Reese is like.
“You don’t want me?”
Grabbing her hand, I place it over the bulge in my jeans. “Does this feel like I don’t want you?” I want you. I want all of you.
“Then what’s wrong?”
I’m scared. “I don’t want to lose you. Reese, I’m leaving in a few months. I have no idea where I’m going to be living.” I pause, taking a deep breath. “You mean the world to me, Reese. I don’t want to ruin our friendship for a quick fuck.”
“I-Is that what this is to you? A quick fuck?”
“No. Not even in the slightest, but if we take this any further, I don’t know if we can come back from it.” I know that I can’t come back from it.
My words seem to pull a mask over her face. Her happy, sated smile is gone. It’s replaced with a smile that I can only describe as fake. “Of course, you’re right. We got carried away. This doesn’t have to change anything. It was one night of a little too much to drink, and we stopped before… well, we stopped, and we can move on past this.” She takes a deep breath and slowly exhales. “I’ll never forget it, but it never happened. Does that make sense?” she asks.
I nod. I can’t speak. I can’t seem to form words. I don’t know if it’s from the fear of losing her or the fear of never having her like this again.
This changes everything.
“Reese.” I force her name past my lips.
“Cooper.” She gives me a bright smile as she pulls the blanket up over her bare breasts. “It’s fine. We’re fine. You’re the most important person in my life.” Her voice cracks, or maybe that’s my heart at the thought of losing her. “Nothing is going to change that or take that away from us.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.” She looks down at the blanket clutched to her chest. “Can you grab me a shirt?”
Scrambling from the bed, I reach into my dresser and grab a T-shirt and hand it to her. “I’m going to go grab a quick shower. You need anything?”
“No. I’m just going to change and go to sleep.”
I take a step forward to what? Kiss her? I fucked that up. No more kissing from those lips. “Okay. I’ll grab us a couple of waters on my way back.”
“Thanks, Coop.” Her voice is small. Sad. And I’m kicking my own ass for making her feel that way. I want the happy, satisfied Reese back.
Grabbing some clothes and the key, I keep my back to her as I slip out of the room. It’s cowardly. I tell myself I’m giving her privacy, I’m still fully clothed, and well, she is not. Tossing my clothes in the bathroom, I rush downstairs and grab two bottles of water, and race back up unnoticed. At least, I hope I was unnoticed.
Locking the bathroom door, I set the bottles on the counter and rest my head back against the door. What the fuck did I do? “Please, God,” I whisper. “Don’t let me lose her over this. I can’t lose her.” Rubbing my hands over my face, I freeze.
I smell her.
Reese.
Fuck me.
I tear at my clothes, not stopping until I’m naked, and then I step into the shower. I turn on the water, and the shock of the cold jolts my system but does nothing about the ache between my legs. My cock is hard and angry. Angry that I walked away. It’s for the best. I know deep down that not letting things go any further was what was best for us. That doesn’t mean I don’t feel shitty about it. That doesn’t mean that my heart isn’t aching at the thought of losing her. I fucked up. I was sober as I only had a few beers. She’s been drinking. I should have stopped us. I never should have given in to temptation.
Resting both hands on the wall of the shower, I tilt my head forward and get lost in my thoughts. Every second of what just happened replays in my mind. She’s fucking incredible. Turning my back to the wall, I grip my cock in my fist. I squeeze and tug root to tip. Closing my eyes, I see firm, round tits, pert, hard nipples, and gorgeous green eyes full of need.