I figured out most of the things grownups didn’t think I would figure out, so I knew what he was really doing. He was going to make “it” with Miss Nola. I also knew that meant I’d be getting a little brother or sister soon. Other than the poopy diapers and the crying, it was pretty exciting.
I liked Miss Nola better than my real mom. Miss Nola didn’t wear stuff that made my nose burn, and she was super nice. She also made my dad seem a lot less grumpy, which I liked.
I was working on a drawing while my babysitter, Miss Patty, talked to herself in the bathroom. She was on the phone with someone named Hem Roid and she sounded really angry at the guy. She was talking and grunting so loud that when there was a thump outside the door, she didn’t even go to answer it.
I knew kids weren’t supposed to answer the doors for strangers, but I also knew our door had a peephole. So I grabbed my stool and carried it over. I was careful to be quiet as I got on my tiptoes and looked through the little glass window.
There was a man and a woman wearing brown uniforms and holding a big cardboard box. The man leaned forward. “Just need you to sign for this, sir.”
“Just a minute!” I called through the door. Most kids probably didn’t know package delivery people worked by themselves. I knew, though. And I knew what this meant. I ran past the bathroom where Miss Patty was still talking to Hem Roid or about him—I wasn’t sure anymore, and slid to my knees by my bed. I dug through my sketchbooks until I found the one I was looking for.
“Home Alone” was written on the cover.42NolaLuca lifted the top flap on the giant box they’d used to smuggle me into the building. He stuck his head over the top, looking down at me. “By the way, you are way heavier than you look.”
“Maybe you should work on those noodle arms instead of criticizing her?” Lindsey suggested.
“Just saying. People are heavy. Not that Nola is heavier than the average person. It was just—”
“Could you guys keep it down?”
“I’m telling you,” Lindsey said. “The kid is by himself. I can feel it.”
“Jack wouldn’t leave Ben by himself,” I said. “He’s either in there, or there’s a babysitter.”
“Then why didn’t the babysitter answer the door? What kinda sitter lets the kid get the door, right?” Luca asked.
There was a sound like tiny silverware spilling on the other side of the door. We all froze, then Luca leaned in until his mouth was close to the door. “Everything okay in there, Mr. Kerrigan?”
“Fine,” Ben called back in an obvious and hilariously bad impersonation of his dad.
What the hell was going on in there?
“Are you able to sign for the package, or do we need to come another time?”
“Just a minute,” Ben called again in that same almost deep voice.
“What do you want us to do?” Luka whispered to me.
“Wait patiently?” I suggested.
The three of us—me curled up in a large box while Luca and Lindsey leaned on it and occasionally opened the flaps to give me fresh air—waited. There wasn’t much else we could do. But the whole time we waited we could hear a sort of frantic activity on the other side of the door. What was Ben doing? And where was the babysitter?
After close to five minutes and two more attempts from Luca to get Ben to open up, I started to get worried that something was wrong.
“Okay, we need to find a way to pick the lock,” I said. “Do either of you know how?”
Luca and Lindsey shrugged. They were in the middle of trying to figure out how to pick it with a hair pin when I heard footsteps approaching down the hallway. I froze. Oh, shit. We were about to get busted.
“You all need help?” asked an elderly man.
Luca laughed, and I felt him leaning on the box as he probably struck a casually innocent pose. “Funny thing is… the client here told us to leave the package inside. Paid extra and everything. But the key they sent didn’t work, so we were trying to find some way in the damn place.”
“Oh, no problem,” The man said. “I do maintenance and I’ve got a master. Here.”
I put my hand over my mouth in disbelief as I heard the key turn and the door open.
“Thank you,” Luca said. “Now where did I put that slip.” I heard him act like he was looking for something while the elderly man made a dismissive sound and shuffled off.
The door creaked as it swung wider. Luka and Lindsey both sucked in a surprised breath. “What?” I asked.
“You might want to come out of the box,” Lindsey said. “I think we’ve been made.”