"You're so beautiful, Emma. And I don't mean physically, although you're that too. I don't know where you came from, but it wasn't anywhere here on this earth."
She laid her head on his chest, listening to his heart. "I've got leopard blood running in my veins, Jake. Believe me, I have the same bad temper and jealous streak that you do."
"I feel lost tonight," he whispered, holding her to him there in the dark.
"It's all right," she said softly. "I'm here and I won't let anything happen to you." She closed her eyes and let herself relax against his body.
"Mommy?" Both turned their heads toward the door, where Kyle stood uncertainly. "I'm afraid."
They both held out a hand simultaneously. "Come here, son," Jake encouraged. Kyle climbed onto the bed and Jake tucked him between them. "There's nothing to be afraid of. You're safe."
"Daddy?" Andraya took her brother's place in the doorway. She'd either seen Kyle coming out of his room, or he'd awakened her to accompany him, which was more likely.
Jake uttered a soft groan and beckoned her, his smile widening when he looked at Emma. Andraya crawled over her father and, ignoring Kyle, wedged herself in the middle, wiggling until she found a comfortable position. Jake put his arm around all of them--his family--and lay back, his fingers tangling with Emma's, remembering that it wasn't that long ago that he was completely alone in his house. Now, they could barely fit in the bed.
"We'll have to have another one to fill this space over here on my side," Jake said, patting the only bare spot he could find.
Emma's fingers tightened around his. "We'll have to get a bigger bed."
Jake fell asleep first and Emma watched him, sleeping like their children. He didn't look younger, only more relaxed. Her heart ached for him. He was struggling to become the man she knew he wanted to be, but he fought it every step of the way, terrified of being vulnerable. She could have told him it was already too late, that he was already there, but she knew he had to come to that realization on his own--not just in a moment in the middle of the night when it was dark and he didn't have to look her in the eye. He had to accept that he knew how to love all of them. Her. The children. Their life together.
She drifted off, dreaming of her mother and the way Emma had always wanted to run with her. She loved it when her mother would assume her animal form and she could lie next to her, fingers tangled in her fur, feeling the extraordinary pleasure of being so close to something wild and powerful. Her father wasn't a shifter, and the odds were against her ever being like her mother. At least she had Jake and she could rub her face in his fur and get her fix that way.
Emma woke to the sound of laughter and several whispering voices. Conspiracy hung heavy in the air. She turned her head and saw them all lined up. The ones she loved. Jake, between Kyle and Andraya. He held a tray and they each carried a flower. She sat up. Jake grinned at her as the sheet slipped, revealing the curve of her breast, and she was forced to yank it up quickly. He set the tray down and handed her a shirt from her closet. It was a button-down, and she hastily put it on, doing up the buttons under his amused gaze.
"We made breakfast, Mommy," Kyle announced.
Andraya nodded. "Breakfast," she echoed.
"It looks great," Emma said. "Thank you so much." Jake set the tray on her lap and she tried not to look dismayed at the strange mixture that looked like it might have eggs in it. "Did you two cook?"
Kyle nodded solemnly. "Daddy helped."
"And he let you choose what you wanted to put in Mommy's eggs?" Emma watched Jake's face. He'd had fun. He'd learned to have fun, spending the morning with his children, letting them mix the ingredients into her eggs. She could see the lines of strain had eased and imagined him with the children on chairs, hunched over a mixing bowl, and Jake laughing to himself.
"They were very certain of what goes into a breakfast scramble," Jake said, trying to look innocent. He failed miserably.
Emma's heart melted at the mischievous joy in his eyes. He had never learned the art of teasing, yet here he was, two little chubby hands clutching his, all three faces beaming at her.
"Aren't you hungry?" Kyle asked anxiously.
"I was just thinking Daddy should share this with Mommy," Emma said, holding out a spoonful of the egg mixture.
Both children looked at Jake expectantly. He stared at the gooey mess like it might bite him. "Daddy ate, remember?"
"You're always hungry and the children did such a good job," Emma countered.
"You have a mean streak in you," Jake observed, perching on the edge of the bed. "I'm going to retaliate, you know." Reluctantly he took the spoon from her.
"I think I'm pretty safe," Emma said, knowing his retaliations tended to be sexual. She smirked at him as the children watched him reluctantly put the spoon into his mouth.
She held out the glass of orange juice as he swallowed so he could wash it down. Jake choked a little, smiled at the children and raised his voice. "Susan. Could you see if the nurse is here to watch the children while Emma showers?"
He had that black velvet voice that insinuated all sorts of erotic things. Susan came running and caught each child by a hand. "I'll take them downstairs." She blushed to the roots of her hair, obviously thinking Jake wanted to be alone with Emma.
"You can't eat this stuff," Jake said as soon as Andraya and Kyle were gone. "You'll be sick for a week." He took the tray from Emma and set it aside.
She started to get out of bed but he stopped her, taking her hand. "I want to get married."
Emma looked up at him startled. "We just got engaged."
"I'm aware of that, Emma, but we have two children. Let's just get it done. I can get us a license immediately and we can get a judge here and just do it. By the way, I have the papers for you to sign for the adoption."
Emma pulled her hand away and shoved the covers back, rolling away from him to the other side of the bed where she had a robe. She couldn't think straight being nearly naked with him fully dressed. There was something too erotic about the way his eyes brushed over her skin and heated her body. Her brain just refused to function. She wasn't going to say yes just because she wanted sex--and she did want sex. Just looking at him filled her with love.
He was so lost. He'd admitted it to her. He fought himself over the growing feelings he had for her. She knew he wanted to keep his emotions in check and regard her and the children the way he did his possessions. His. He cared for them, protected them, provided the best for them, but he didn't invest his heart. The problem was, Jake didn't know himself very well. He cared for the people working for him. He cared for Drake and Joshua and every other lame duck he'd brought home. And he loved Andraya and Kyle. In his eyes, when he held her, in his voice when he talked to her in the middle of the night, Emma saw and heard that he loved her. He might not recognize it, but she did.
"Emma, stop stalling. How hard can it be just to say yes? Why wouldn't we?"
"You're like a gazillionaire, Jake. You need a prenuptial to protect you. That takes time to put in place, especially when you have the money and property and companies you have."
His eyebrow shot up. "Did Stillman contact you?" he asked suspiciously.
Emma shrugged, trying to look casual. "I contacted him."
He stood up, towering over her, looking incredibly intimidating. Emma refused to step back, looking up at him, refusing to be sorry for doing what she felt was right.
"You did what?"
"It was important to me to protect you," Emma said quietly.
"No."
Emma swept past him, heading for the bathroom, her nerve breaking at the muscle ticking in his jaw. Jake caught her arm, abruptly halting her.
"I'm not discussing this with you, Jake," she said, pressing her lips tightly together.
"No, I'll be discussing this with Stillman. I don't want a prenuptial. It's going to be difficult enough without you thinking we're not on equal footing. Whatever I have is yours. I meant what I said when we fi
rst talked marriage. I don't believe in divorce. This is it for us. We do it, and we find a way to live with it."
Her heart jumped. "Jake, try being just a little romantic about marriage instead of being ruthless. You sound like you're threatening me instead of proposing."
He caught her chin and tipped up her face. "I've tried never to lie to you, about what I am inside or how difficult I can be. I have every confidence that I'll do my best for you, but I'm also very aware I'll want everything my way.
You're sweet and kind, Emma, and I'm likely to take advantage of that and walk all over you if you let me. I want the playing field leveled so you never feel as if I have the advantages all on my side."
She shook her head. "Your logic is so elusive, Jake."
"I plan on having a half dozen more kids with you. Why? To keep you right here, on this ranch, so there's no place you can run to. That's my kind of logic, Emma."
"You're supposed to have children because you want them, Jake," she pointed out, exasperated. "Not to keep me occupied so I won't run away."
"I want them because you're going to love them. I want to watch you love them. I want to watch that look come over your face whenever you look at them. I want to hear the sound of your voice, that special note you have reserved just for them. I could live forever listening to you talk to the children." He couldn't tell her what it did to him inside. Made him soft. Happy. Stupidly happy. She scared the hell out of him the way she made him happy.
"Jake, someday you have to realize I'm staying with you because I want to stay with you. You only think you manipulated me. I knew what you were doing all along. I stay because I love you . . ."