I imagine that when I let him care for me, a small part of him heals. Just a little.
He tosses and turns in bed, and I can feel how restless he is.
We moved to the Pacific Northwest of America. It’s beautiful here, but very different from his homeland. Though he misses Russia, and a little part of me does, too, we needed to start a new life. According to all legal documents, Sadie Warren went missing over a year ago. Sadie Romanov now lives with her son and husband in a humble home.
I teach reading to a group of local children at a small-town library within walking distance of our little home. Karol plays in the children’s section while I teach. I draw a tiny salary that barely amounts to anything, but it’s something. Kazimir took a job as a bouncer at a local night club. With his stature and presence, he’s a natural fit. He does his job well, and it pays decently enough. His boss is an honest man, which means something to Kazimir. He asks no questions, and no one knows what the large, brooding Russian man did in his former life. Kazimir likes that when his shift is done, he leaves his work at the door.
Kazimir has a significant sum of money put away, and we can access it easily if we need to. We both enjoy the security it affords us, but for now, the simple life appeals to us both.
When he left his brothers, Demyan surprised us both by giving him an ample severance of sorts. I didn’t expect anything like that, but Kazimir feels in some way, Demyan is paying him off to never return. He wants to command his men the way he sees fit without dealing with the allegiance the other men show Kazimir. It works for me. Our little home is paid for.
Kazimir suspected he was no longer considered in good standing with his brothers, but after Dimitri’s death, things changed. Though most of the men are happy to consider Kazimir long gone, Filip and Maksym both sent us little Christmas gifts for Karol, like doting, long-distance uncles. It was sweet, and I think it meant more to Kazimir than he lets on.
“Why can’t you sleep, Kazimir?” My eyes are so heavy, I close them, but I wiggle my ass against his crotch. He gives me a playful spank and chuckles.
“Maybe because I have the most beautiful woman in my bed,” he says. “My eyes are tired, but my cock doesn’t want to rest, krasotka.”
I reach to his crotch and palm his erection behind me. “Down, boy,” I order. “I need to sleep.”
But when his mouth comes to my neck and kisses me in that tender spot, butterflies dance in my belly. When he lifts his hand to my breast and cups it, then lets his thumb carelessly drag over my nipple, I moan and roll over on my back.
“I thought you were tired,” he growls in my ear, taking my lobe between his teeth.
“I was,” I whisper. “I am. If people can sleep walk, I can sleep sex.”
He lifts my leg and drapes it against him, chuckling.
“Sleep sex,” he tells me. “As if I’ve hypnotized you.”
I smile at him. “Haven’t you?”
“I don’t see you on your knees sucking my cock, so apparently I didn’t do a good job of it.”
I giggle, then moan as his mouth comes to mine. I sigh, losing myself to sensation, as he eases me out of my panties and slowly, with torturously languid strokes, takes me until I’m panting my release while he groans in my ear. When we’re done and clean, I yawn.
“Now, will you sleep?” I ask him.
But he’s already softly dozing beside me.KazimirWhen I pull up to the house, she’s swinging her legs off the side of the porch swing. I groaned when I saw her eyes go wide at this house. It needed so much work, and I’m tired. But I saw how badly she wanted it before she ever told me, and I have to give my girl what she wants.
We worked together, though. Sanding the wooden floors, polishing the built-in shelves of the tiny room no bigger than a pantry that she calls “the library.” Painting and priming, and making it ours. And now, when I come home, and see her swinging on the swing and Karol pushing trucks up the steps, my heart aches with emotion I can’t name.
I love my family more than anything in the world. I don’t deserve such perfect beauty in my life, and it’s my mission to make amends for what I’ve done by devoting myself to them.
When the past haunts me, she sees it in my eyes, and soothes what plagues me with her gentle voice, her tender touch, her little arms about my neck. She hands me rope to bind her and bends to my will, begging me to paint her naked skin with my belt or mark her with my hand. There’s no hiding how aroused she gets when I dominate her. But I know there’s more to it than that. She knows I grapple the past when I master her body.In giving me her trust, she makes me whole.