If she follows my lead, and puts her trust in me, I will do everything in my power to keep her safe. She holds my gaze for long minutes before she replies. Nodding, she bows her head. “Yes, sir.”
I reach for her hand and squeeze it. There are so many other things I wish to say, but not here. Not now.
I take her back to the room and make love to her again, as slow and steady as before, but this time the union is even sweeter. After we make love, I pull her onto my chest.
I want to claim her body and leave my mark. Fuck her. Fucking own her. But not now. It’s too soon. She’s too young, too fragile.
So young.
My conscience plagues me. Marissa has her whole life ahead of her. Who am I to take that from her? Once I free her from this, from all ties to the Bratva and the captivity she’s endured, she could live her life unencumbered with a much older man like me. I come with baggage and the weight of the life I’ve lived.
“What are you thinking?” she says softly. I can’t tell her. Not if we’re going to keep our cover.
I smile slowly at her. “That I can’t wait to fuck you.”
She captures her lips between her teeth. “You just did.”
I chuckle and shake my head. “I made love to you, zvezda moya. That is very, very different.”
“The, um, movements are the same?” she offers helpfully. That makes me laugh out loud and hell, it feels good to do that.
“You will see.”
She falls asleep tucked up onto my chest with a smile on her lips. I hold her, and wish I could hold her forever. I wish I could erase what lurks in every corner. I could secret her away to the furthest corner of the earth and they could still find her. And no logical argument prevails. She was sold, for a price, the price her father likely had to pay. I paid that price. What happens to her next doesn’t matter.
But the Boston Bratva may think otherwise.
Soon, she falls asleep, but I can’t. I go over every scenario in my mind, some that could possibly work, and some that border on the insane. But in the end, I come back with the same conclusion I have since the very beginning.
I can’t run from this danger.
I need to confront it head on.
When the fingertips of sunrise begin to creep beneath the window covering, I fall into a brief and restless sleep. I wake with her curled up on me, her knee crooked up and her hair spread out on my chest. I bend down and kiss the top of her head.
“You awake?” she asks.
“I am. Are you?”
She giggles. God, it’s the cutest thing. But I quickly sober. Today is the day.
“You’ll have to be on your best behavior today. If anyone suspects you aren’t well-trained, it puts us at risk.”
She sighs. “I will, sir.” But there’s a note of chagrin in her voice. I take her chin between my fingers and lift her gaze upward.
“What is it, zvezda moya?”
“You keep telling me to obey you,” she says, and to my horror, her voice wavers and her eyes shine with unshed tears. “But I am trying the best that I can. I haven’t defied you. Not at all. I slipped up once by accident, and a few times I’ve been too shocked to obey you immediately.”
My heart squeezes and I want to kick myself. She yearns to please me so much, and I haven’t honored her obedience to me.
“Sweet girl,” I say, holding her even tighter. “You please me more than words can say, in all that you do. You are beautiful and kind, and such a very good girl. It isn’t you that worries me.”
She basks in my praise like a flower in the sun, blooming to full brightness under the rays. “Tell me again, sir? Please.” Her voice is choked with emotion. How could I have overlooked this before? How desperate she is for my approval?
“You are such a good girl,” I tell her. “I can’t imagine how you could please me more.”
And then she’s crying, tears falling down her cheeks, sniffing into my chest.
“Marissa,” I whisper, but she shakes her head.
“Years,” she manages to choke out. “I’ve wanted you for years. And it isn’t fair how hard we have to fight to be together. But it doesn’t matter. None of it does. We fight harder than anyone else, and when we finally can live in peace, we will appreciate it more.”
My throat is tight. I swallow hard to keep my emotions in check, to remain strong for her.
“We will,” I agree. “Hell, we already do. Now let’s do what we need to today. Let’s follow the script. Trust me, sweet girl. Will you?”