He doesn’t have the chance to respond because Sasha starts laughing. A bold, loud laugh that fills the gym. I see small smiles cracking on people’s faces, some of them covering them with their hands. She’s winning them over. “Isn’t that cute? Everyone in the school knows that you’re in love with Adam. It makes perfect sense that you’d do anything you possibly could do dance with him.”
I don’t dare look back at him. Not now. I don’t want to know. “I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t do this,” I say. I look at people in the crowd. I look at the teachers. “I didn’t even want to come to prom,” I said. “I came with a friend. I didn’t…” I trail off because there’s not one person who seems to believe me. “How does Sasha even know that my name was written in blue ink? How would she know that if she hadn’t seen the envelope herself?”
Just for a second, I think I’m making progress. I see some people try to think about that, but Sasha doesn’t let them finish the thought. “Ollie, you’re nothing but a cheater. I mean, I understand why you did it,” she sounds sympathetic, but she’s really not, “but it’s pathetic.” She rips the tiara off my head, and I wince as it tears at my hair. “I think it’s time for you to go.”
“But—”
“CHEATER!” she yells it in my face.
I try to say something. It’s not true. “I’m not—”
“CHEATER!”
A tear slips out, and I can’t breathe. She’s not going to let me talk or defend myself. She put this together so perfectly that no one is going to question her. “Please,” I say, but no one hears it. Sasha is chanting the word now, and other people have joined her. There’s pain in my chest, and I can’t…I can’t…
I look back at Adam, and he looks disappointed. Like he doesn’t know what to think of me, and I feel my heart fracture in two. I run, and the crowd parts for me. I’m not sure how I make it to the doors, because I can’t see anything.
I’ve never felt this kind of pain before and I don’t know what to do. Somehow I make it to my car, and I collapse into the backseat, letting tears and pain consume me. What did I ever do to make people want to treat me like this? Why couldn’t Sasha just leave me alone?
If I never see any of these people again, it’ll be too soon.
8
Ollie
Present Day
The air is still perfect, and Adam doesn’t let go of my hand until we’re outside and across the street to the square with trees and a fountain by the Plaza. It’s a strange kind of place, dark in the middle of New York’s brilliance. Somehow all the noise doesn’t seem to reach right here, and it feel like we’re completely alone.
“How have you been, really?”
I shrug. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” I make a face. “Why?”
Adam scratches the back of his neck, “I was worried about you.”
I’m still not getting it. “But why?”
“It’s really good to see you,” he says. “I’m glad that you’re doing well.”
“Yeah.”
He puts his hands in his pockets. “So what did you decide to do after high school?”
“College,” I say. Then I laugh. “I’m kidding. I did go to college, but I’m an accountant now. Super sexy, I know.”
“That’s great,” he says. “Seriously. I would be lost without my accountant. They get a bad rap but I think most people would fall apart without people who actually understand tax law.”
“I do get a lot of very nice thank you gifts around tax season.”
He laughs. “Anything else? Are you seeing anyone?”
There’s no way in hell I’m going to tell him about my nerdy single existence. The life that’s not glamorous like tonight. The one where I stay home reading books and watching Netflix and occasionally going on dates with men who don’t find me attractive. “Well, that’s not fair,” I say. “Don’t I get to hear about your career too?”
Adam looks suddenly shy. “I’m finishing up the last year of my residency, I graduate next year.”
“Residency as in doctor? Wow!”
“You seem surprised,” he says, chuckling.
“I mean, I am a little. I guess I figured you’d have gone into finance or something.”
He nods. “A lot of guys from our class did. I didn’t even really know it was something I wanted to do until college. In fact, I was sure I didn’t want to be a doctor since both my parents are. But I took a bunch of classes in different fields my first semester, and to make my family happy, one of them was a pre-med bio class. I was surprised how much I loved it. And of course my parents were thrilled. I never looked back.”
“That’s really great, Adam. What’s your specialty?”
“Pediatrics.”
Wow. “That’s really amazing, Adam.” And I mean it. “Where are you?”
“Columbia. I’m hoping to stay there too.”
“Good to know that you’re not planning to leave anytime soon.”
“Why is that good?” he asks with a smile.
I shrug. “No reason. But I do think it’s great that you’re doing something to help people. I mean, as much as I like my job, I can’t really say that.”
“Well—”
I hold up my hand. “You know what I mean.”
“I do.” Adam looks down at the ground, and over at the fountain, then back at me. “I’ve been thinking about you, Ollie.”
I try to ignore the way my breath catches in my chest. “Probably just the reunion. I imagine you’ve been thinking about everybody in our class.”
“No. I’ve been thinking about you for a long time. I actually never stopped.”
I freeze, try to push down the hope that blooms through me. He doesn’t mean what I think he means. The only reason that he thought about me was because of everything that happened.
There’s a silence for a moment and then he takes a step forward. “I want to apologize.”
The intensity in his face is mesmerizing, and I don’t want to look away, but I don’t understand. “Adam, we haven’t seen each other in ten years. What are you apologizing for?”
“For ten years ago. I never got to know you in school the way I really wanted to, and what happened at prom, I shouldn’t have just stood there. I should have said something or gone after you. That was my fault.”
I close my eyes, fighting against the memory that wells up in my brain, still impossibly painful after all this time. “It wasn’t your fault. That was all Sasha.”
“No,” he says. “I’m the reason that she did it. She wanted me to go out with her, and I turned her down that night.”
I open my eyes, and I’m staring into his perfect green eyes and I’m suddenly nervous. What does this mean? “Why did you turn her down?”
“Because I liked you. And she hated that.”
Suddenly the question I’ve been asking myself for ten years—why would Sasha Daniels target me like that—has an answer. I’m not sure if I’m angry or relieved, but I’m glad that I know. If I had known this a long time ago, things would have been different. “I wish you’d told me that a long time ago.”
“Yeah,” he says. “But you didn’t come back, and after that night I didn’t think that you’d want to see anyone. And the more time passed the harder it got to consider reaching out. Which is why I’m apologizing now. I should have done more, and I regret not getting to know you when I had the chance.”
The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “You still can.”
It settles in my gut, that I forgive him. It’s not his fault that Sasha chose to take his rejection out on me, and yeah he could have done something, could have said something, but he wasn’t the only person that didn’t. I mean, I wish that he had told me about his feelings a long time ago, but I didn’t tell him that I liked him either. And staying angry about it isn’t going to help either of us. Besides, maybe there’s a chance now.
Adam’s face goes still in shock at my words. I don’t think he was expecting me to say that. It’s fair, I wasn’t expecting me to say that either. Yeah, that was probably stupid. He didn’t bring me out here to hit on me, he brought me out here to absolve ten years of guilt. The realization of just how wrong I was about this situation creeps up and I blush, embarrassment making me flash hot. “I should go,” I say, turning and heading back toward the hotel.