He wrestled with it in his head and made a decision. Climbing out of bed, he walked to the sofa and picked up a notepad from the small table in front of it, using only a soft glow from his phone to see. He wrote her a note and lay it down before quietly packing some of his things and walking out the front door, fighting the urge to turn around and tear up the paper the whole time.
Straddling his bike, he sat there for a moment without cranking it and looked out across the lake, its surface shimmering with the light of the moon. It was beautiful there. His time with her in this place would be something he could never forget, but this was best and there was no getting around that fact.
Finally, he cranked the bike and pointed it toward the road that led back out to the highway. She would be fine, he told himself. The worst was over for her and she would come out on the other side better than ever. That is what he wanted for her. Under different circumstances, he might want to share it with her, but neither of them could afford that. They would only hold one another back.
He pushed her out of his head as he hit the highway and opened the bike up, unsure of where he was headed but knowing it had to be as far from the temptation of her as possible. As it turned out, that wasn’t very far at all. He pulled into his driveway and dragged himself inside, feeling somehow defeated.CHAPTER TWENTY-FOURAutumn-10
She had heard him packing, heard the bike—still, she had lain motionless, feigning sleep. Maybe he just needed some time alone. She wouldn’t try to stop him. It might be best that he go home for a few days and sort out his head. She had to admit that it might be good for her, as well. It would be harder to get to work, but she’d manage. If nothing else, she could always shift and run in with a small pack in her mouth, shifting back in a secluded area near the restaurant and walking the rest of the way as a human. There is only so long you can depend on the kindness of strangers, and isn’t that what he was, really?
Once she heard the bike growing distant outside the cabin, she finally stirred from the bed and turned on the lights. Looking around, she could see that he had left a couple of drawers open where he had taken his clothes out. Some of his things were still strewn about, but nothing he couldn’t do without for a few days, she supposed.
She took a deep breath and let out a sigh, turning on a nearby lamp and walking over to the kitchen to make herself a cup of cocoa. Her mother used to say that cocoa made everything better, but perhaps that was only when she made it as this cup was doing nothing to fill the hole she felt growing inside of her. Was she so distressed about being alone or was it specifically because he had left? She couldn’t quite be sure, nor did it matter, she reckoned.
It was only when she sat down on the sofa that she realized things were much worse than just his leaving for a day or two. Picking up the note, she read it and put it back down beside the set of keys that lay nearby. She felt a trembling rise through her body until she was shaking all over, some little-understood fear taking over her person as she absorbed the words. After a moment, she picked it up and read it again.
Autumn, thank you for the weeks we’ve had together here. They’ve been wonderful. I think we know that it’s time for us to say goodbye, and I apologize for not doing that in person, but perhaps it’s better this way. Stay here for as long as you like. Make use of anything you want in the cellar and elsewhere as my Uncle won’t be returning to the cabin either. For now, it is yours. I’ve also left you the keys to the old car in the garage. It is yours to use while you’re here. I only ask that you let me know when you leave so that I can secure the place again. Please know that I’m in no hurry for you to go, but I think we both know we can’t stay together there. All my best thoughts are with you, Malcolm.
The shaking stopped, replaced by a flood of unexpected tears. She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, sobbing until she had nothing left to give, but after a while, she climbed back into bed and pulled the covers over her head. Though the tears had stopped, they started anew. She fell asleep on her wet pillow, an emotional exhaustion claiming her and pulling her down into the darkness.