Page 22 of Elsewhere

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Liz agrees (the dive store is there anyway) but for obvious reasons says she will take the bus back.


The diving tank Liz buys is smaller and lighter than any tank she and her mother ever had on Earth. It's called an Infinity Tank, and the salesman promises Liz that it will never run out of oxygen. As a nod to Betty, Liz also buys one pair of jeans and one long-sleeved T-shirt.


Liz hides the equipment underneath her bed. She feels guilty about lying to Betty but deems the lies necessary evils. She had considered telling Betty about the dive but knew that Betty would only worry. She doesn't need Betty worrying any more than she already does.


It has been a year since Liz's last dive on Earth. She wonders if she will have forgotten all the procedures in the intervening time. She considers making a practice dive, but ultimately decides against it. If she is going to do this, she knows she needs to do it now.


Because going to the Well is forbidden, Liz decides to leave just after sunset. She packs her equipment in a large garbage bag and wears her wet suit under her new jeans and long-sleeved T-shirt.


"Is that what you bought today?" Betty asks.


Liz nods.


"It's nice to see you out of your pajamas." Betty moves to get a better look at Liz. "I'm not sure if the fit is right, though." Betty tries to adjust Liz's T-shirt, but Liz pulls away.


"It's fine!" Liz insists.


"Okay, okay. You'll show me the other things you bought in the morning?"


Liz nods, but looks away.


"Where are you going anyway?" Betty asks.


"That girl Thandi is throwing a party," Liz lies.


"Well, have a good time!" Betty smiles at Liz. "What's in the garbage bag, by the way?"


"Just some stuff for the party." Liz finds telling lies easy now that she's started. The only problem (as many before Liz have discovered) is that she has to keep telling more and more of them.


After Liz has left, Betty decides to go into Liz's room to examine Liz's new clothes. She finds the closet empty, but under the bed she finds a cardboard box with the words infinity tank on it.


Remembering Liz's bulky outfit and her big plastic bag, Betty decides to go find her granddaughter. In How to Talk to Your Recently Deceased Teen, it also says that you need to know when to stop giving your teen space.


Before diving, Liz returns to the OD for a final look at Amadou Bonamy. She wants to see him one last time before turning him in.


From behind her glass box, Esther frowns. "You haven't been here in a few days. I was hoping you were quit of this place," she says.


Liz walks past her without answering.


Someone is sitting at Binoculars #15, Liz's usual spot, so she is forced to use #14.


She places a single eternim in the slot and begins to watch Amadou Bonamy. Amadou's cab is vacant, and he's speeding to get somewhere. He parks in front of an elementary school, the same one Liz's brother attends, and runs out of the car. He's walking through the building. He's running through the building. A teacher stands with a small boy wearing glasses at the end of the corridor.


"He threw up in the wastebasket," the teacher says. "He didn't want us to call you."


Amadou gets down on one knee. "Is it your tummy, my little one?" He speaks with a soft FrenchHaitian accent.


The boy nods.


"I'll drive you home, wi bÈbÈ?"


"Don't you have to drive your cab today?" the boy asks.


"Non, non. I will make up the fares tomorrow." Amadou lifts the boy in his arms and winks at the teacher. "Thank you for calling me."


The binoculars click closed.


Liz's heart races. She wants to punch someone or break something. Either way, she needs to get out of the Observation Deck immediately.


Outside, the beach is deserted. She takes off her jeans and T-shirt, but she makes no move to get in the water and begin her dive. She just sits, knees to her chest, and thinks about Amadou and his little boy. And the more she thinks about them, the more confused she feels. And the more she thinks about them, the more she wants to stop thinking about them.


Someone calls her name. "Liz!" It's Betty.


"How did you know I would be here?" Liz asks. She avoids Betty's eyes.


"I didn't. The only place I knew for sure you wouldn't be was a party at Thandi's."


Liz nods.


"That was a joke, by the way." Betty looks at Liz's wet suit. "Actually, I found the empty tank box in your room and I thought you might be planning to make Contact."


"Are you angry?" Liz asks.


"At least I know what you spent the money on," Betty says. "That was another joke, by the way. In this book I'm reading, it says that humor is a good way to cope with a difficult situation."


"What book?" Liz asks.


"It's called How to Talk to Your Recently Deceased Teen."


"Is it helping?"


"Not really." Betty shakes her head. "In all seriousness, Liz, I certainly wish you hadn't lied to me, but I'm not angry. I wish you had come to me, but I know it isn't easy for you right now. You probably have your reasons."


Affected by Betty's words, Liz thinks that Amadou probably had his reasons, too. "I saw the man who was driving the cab. The cab that hit me, I mean," Liz says.


"What was he like?"


"He seemed nice." Liz pauses. "Did you know I was a hit-and-run?"


"Yes," Betty replies.


"Why didn't he stop? I mean, if he's a good person. He seems like one."


"I'm sure he is, Liz. People, you'll find, aren't usually all good or all bad. Sometimes they're a little bit good and a whole lot bad. And sometimes, they're mostly good with a dash of bad. And most of us, well, we fall in the middle somewhere."


Liz starts to cry, and Betty takes Liz in her arms. All at once, Liz knows she won't tell anyone that Amadou was the driver of the lucky cab today or any other day. She knows it won't help anything. She suspects that Amadou is a good person. There must have been a good reason he didn't stop. And even if there wasn't, Liz suddenly remembers something else, something that she had not wanted to remember in all this time.


"Betty," Liz says through tears, "that day at the mall, I didn't look both ways when I was crossing the street. The traffic light had already turned green, but I didn't see it because I was thinking about something else."


"What was it?" Betty asks.


"It's so stupid. I was thinking about my watch, how I should have brought it with me to the mall to be repaired. I kept forgetting to do it. I was deciding whether I had enough time to turn around and go back for it, but I couldn't make up my mind, because I didn't know what time it was because my watch was broken. It was a big, meaningless circle. Oh Betty, this was my fault. This was all my fault, and now I'm stuck here forever!"


"It only seems like forever," Betty says gently. "It's really only fifteen years."


"It won't make me alive again if he goes to prison," Liz whispers. "Nothing can ever do that."


"So you forgive him?"


"I don't know. I want to, but . . ." Liz's voice trails off. She feels empty. Anger and revenge gave her heft. Without her old friends to prop her up, she's only left with a single question: what now? !


Tags: Gabrielle Zevin Young Adult