“Because of having to force yourself to slow down and move like a human?” I asked, vaguely remembering Zoe explaining why she always came in dead last in gym class.
Emery nodded as she glanced at Heidi. “It takes more energy for us to slow down. Not to mention, it’s exhausting always being aware of how fast we’re moving and how we’re behaving, so it would be nice to live out in the open, but not in the way they wanted. To Shia and others like him, it was never about equal rights. It was about dominating humans and proving we were stronger, smarter, and better in every aspect. They helped the invading Luxen.”
I drew in a short breath as I sank into the thick cushions.
“Shia helped them, and when the war began, he was on the other side.” She bit down on her lip, looking at the menu from a bakery down the street that offered all variations of cupcakes humanly possible. “We tried to get him out. You know, to get him to see that what they wanted to do wasn’t right. Wasn’t any better than what the humans are trying to do now. He wouldn’t listen, and it happened right after the war—during the first wave of raids, where they were just rounding up Luxen and…”
And killing them.
My memories of the time after the invasion weren’t real … or at least, they weren’t my memories. Or maybe the memory of the fear and confusion had been mine and that trauma had broken through the fever, forever implanted. Either way, it had been a scary time for humans and Luxen alike.
“He’d been spotted before, during the war, and they couldn’t tell Shia and Tobias apart. Not that it mattered then. They both were killed, and my mother tried to intervene. She was slaughtered right along with them. It happened so quickly. They were alive one moment and dead the next.” Her lower lip trembled as she gave a short shake of her head. “I don’t even know how I escaped. It’s a blur to me now, but I got out of there.”
“You don’t have to talk about this,” I told her, my heart squeezing as Heidi rested her cheek on Emery’s shoulder. “I mean, I don’t want you to feel like you do.”
“No. It’s okay.” Emery’s smile was brief. “It’s good to talk about these kinds of things sometimes. You know?”
I nodded. “What did you do afterward?”
“Moved from city to city, trying to keep a low profile. I met some other Luxen along the way, others like me who were unregistered and just wanted to live. I ended up in Maryland after hearing about this place where unregistered Luxen could be safe.”
“Foretoken?”
Emery nodded. “Didn’t believe it, even after I first met Luc. Couldn’t figure out how he, at the time being like fifteen or sixteen, could remotely guarantee anyone’s safety, but he took me in and got me straight.”
“Got you straight?”
Heidi glanced at Emery before speaking. “Let’s just say Emery was on a very understandable, destructive path.”
“I wasn’t taking care of myself. Not eating right and … there are drugs out there that have the same kind of effects on us as they do on you,” she said, and that I hadn’t known. “Ketamine. Some narcotics.” She rubbed her hands together. “Heroin. It takes twice the dose—sometimes more than what a human can withstand—for it to have the same effects, but I fell down that rabbit hole.”
Oh God, I didn’t know what to say. I’m sorry didn’t feel like it would cover it. All I could do was offer her no judgment, and that’s what I did. Luxen or human, not everyone who went down that path did so because they woke up one day and decided to trash their life. Some ended up there because of human doctors overprescribing pain medications. Others, like Emery, were trying to escape trauma, and I could understand that.
Empathy was power.
“When I met Luc, I had no idea he was an Origin. I had no idea they even existed. I couldn’t figure out how he spent ten minutes with me and seemed to know my deepest secrets.”
“He was reading your thoughts?” I guessed.
A quick smile appeared. “Yeah, and he knew right off the bat that I had a problem, and me getting clean was his only condition of helping me. And he did, he and Grayson and Kent. It wasn’t easy. Hell, there are still days…”
“Never again.” Heidi cupped Emery’s cheek, guiding the Luxen’s gaze to hers. “Right?”
“Right,” Emery whispered.
Feeling I was creeping on an intimate moment, a vulnerable one, I lowered my gaze to the menu. I saw the glorious lists of cupcakes, but I wasn’t processing the words.
I was thinking about what Emery had just shared.
Not only had Luc provided someplace safe for Emery, as he had for countless others, he’d also gotten her clean. God. That was no small feat for humans.