I don’t know why I’m even thinking about this. I don’t plan on dating Jay, or anyone else for that matter. I do have to admit that he has been sweet since the second I met him, making it really hard for me to stick to that no dating plan. I pick up my glass, taking a healthy swig and trying to get my nerves under control. I pray Avery doesn't say something else to embarrass me.
“So you guys are sisters?” Jay asks, looking between us and obviously recognizing that we look nothing alike.
“We share a dad,” Avery informs him. I take another drink of my wine. I can feel Jay’s eyes on me. I think he can sense the awkwardness that bringing up my dad has caused for me. “Dove hates him. She clams up whenever he’s mentioned.”
I give her a look. “We share the same sperm donor. He’s not my father.”
Avery gives a half smile. “I’m not giving up on the two of you.”
I wish she would. I’ll never forgive him. I’ll never forget how hard he made my mom work because he didn’t want the world to know about his dirty secret. I would always remember how strong my mom was, though. How she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of letting him pay her hush money. She raised me by herself, supporting me on her own.
Even if for some crazy reason I could get over the whole never claiming me as his daughter crap and he wanted to try and have some kind of relationship, it would feel as though I was betraying my mom. Which is something that I would never be willing to do.
“The only great thing my father did for me was give me Avery.” She reaches out and grabs my hand, giving it a squeeze.
“I found out about her three years ago and tracked her down.”
I smile, thinking back to the day. “I was sure she was there to scream at me,” I admit.
“Yeah, I’m older than Dove, and my parents are still married.”
Jay cringes. “How do your parents feel about the two of you hanging out?”
I look to Avery, waiting for her answer.
“My parents are hot and cold. They have been off and on more times than I can count, but they always end up back together, so Mom knows about Dove. She just doesn't mention her, so I kind of do the same. I don’t want to rub it in her face.” I nod in understanding. I get it. I really do, but on some level it still makes me feel like a dirty secret.
I know Avery is doing the best she can with the situation, and I love her for that. I don’t know what I would have done without her when my mom passed away. She’d been my rock. Jay continues to stare at me, and I feel like he can see into me and knows everything I’m thinking.
“Anyone want more wine?” I ask, changing the subject. I try to always avoid it when I can. Avery has this dream in her head that one day we’ll all be a giant family. I top everyone off, including myself. Thankfully, the conversation falls into small talk about Jay doing some work on his place and hoping to have it done soon. That way we can have dinner over there sometime soon.
“Let’s watch a movie.” Avery pops up from the floor, grabbing the remote before I can agree or disagree. It’s getting late, and I have to be up early. Then again, I was enjoying having Jay here.
Jay picks up the food for us while Avery finds a movie for us to watch. I get up, sitting on the sofa. Jay comes back over, sitting right next to me. He’s so close that his leg is pressed up against mine.
“Oh, shoot. I forgot I have a paper I need to finish. Rain check?” she asks, picking up her purse.
“You’re leaving?” I stand. I’m going to murder her.
“Yeah, you two enjoy the movie. Call me tomorrow.” She gives me a hug like I don’t know what she’s up to.
I watch the door fall closed behind her. Jay gets up and locks it before coming back and sitting down on the sofa.
I should move to the other end of the couch now that Avery isn’t here, but I don’t move one inch. He grabs the blanket off the back of the sofa, putting it over me.
“You don’t have to stay,” I tell him with a yawn. It's nice having someone here with me if I’m being honest.
“I’m good.” He stretches his legs out as the movie starts to play. “Relax,” he tells me, wrapping an arm around me, pulling me into his side. My head rests on him. I should protest, but it feels too good. Besides there’s nothing wrong with two friends hanging out and watching a movie together. None of this makes it a date. People do this all of the time. That’s what I convince myself seconds before sleep takes me.