A rush of different emotions clashed in Adam’s brain. Who the hell was he to press this woman, to open wounds that clearly hadn’t healed? At the same time, he recognized that wounds that had been hidden and ignored could never fully heal. Until she could face her pain and sorrow, her wound would continue to fester and chafe in her soul, preventing her from any kind of real recovery.
He pulled the car over onto the shoulder beside a field of yellow and purple wildflowers, though he left the engine running. The early morning clouds had cleared and the sky was a brilliant blue. Shani rolled down her window and inhaled deeply. “I’d forgotten how fresh and clear the air is here. I’ve missed this place. More than I realized.”
Adam unbuckled his seatbelt and reached over, gently turning Shani’s head so she was facing him. Leaning toward her, he took her face in his hands and kissed her lightly on the lips.
Letting her go, he said, “It’s time, Princess. Tell me what happened. Whatever it was, you’re here now. You got away. You’re strong and brave. It’s time to stop giving that man so much power over you. It’s time you kicked the bastard out of your head once and for all.”
The frightened rabbit look fell away as Shani lifted her chin, determination now in her gaze. “You’re right. It’s well past time. I’m ready now. Ready to tell you. Ready to put this behind me, once and for all.”Chapter 8Shani shook her head, snorting softly. “It was only one month. One lousy little month that completely changed the trajectory of my life. I let him chase me away from my family and my home. While I’ve been very happy on Desire Island, I can’t deny that my initial motivation was to get away from Sir and Portland, as fast and as far as I could.”
She reached for Adam’s hand, giving it a strong squeeze, her expression resolved, almost fierce. “Okay. I’m going to finish this. It’s good to say it out loud after keeping it secret for so long.” She took another breath, and said, “That last time, something finally snapped in me. The crazy thing is, how long it took me to get there.”
She laughed a bitter laugh. “It’s so easy to see now, with the advantage of time and distance, but while I was in the middle of it, it wasn’t so clear. The man wasn’t a Master. He was an abusive fuck. I think he was terrified of me on some level. Maybe of women in general. And he’d found a way to deal with his fears by dominating submissive women like me who were stupid enough to fall for his outward charm and seductive ways.”
Now that she was talking, it was as if a spigot had been opened, and the words came tumbling out. Adam kept quiet, his eyes fixed on her face.
“The ironic thing was, I’d never had a strong-held fantasy of being in a Master/slave relationship. I adore bondage and erotic pain. I love the theater of submission and being dominated by a strong, confident man.” Her face softened as she met Adam’s gaze. “A man like you,” she said almost shyly, making his heart clutch with tenderness.
“But Sir—” She broke off abruptly with a sharp shake of her head. “No. Not Sir. He doesn’t deserve that title, though he made me call him that. Brandon. That was his name. Brandon Parker. We met at one of those munch things that BDSM groups sometimes put on. He was good looking, in an All-American big beefy blond kind of way, and he was a smooth talker. He invited me to a BDSM club the next weekend, and we hit it off well. He was skilled as a Dom and the scenes were hot and sexy.
“I had just been laid off from my job as a sales clerk at a little clothing boutique and I wasn’t sure what I was going to do next. My lease was up on my apartment and my car was on its last legs, or should I say wheels.”
She grinned and Adam grinned back, glad she was smiling now, though the pain was still in her eyes.
“He had a lot of money and his own house,” she continued. “Somehow, he convinced me, though we’d known each other all of a week or so, to move in with him. At first, it was actually pretty great. His house had three bedrooms, and he even gave me my own bedroom, claiming we could work up to something more intimate, if it seemed right for us. And if not, he was just glad to give me a hand up while I looked for a new job.
“We became lovers, because, why not? He was super attentive and kind—at first. He had a full BDSM dungeon in his basement. When he brought up the idea of us becoming Master and slave, I resisted at first. But he made it sound so sexy and compelling that I thought, what the heck. It would be cool to try it—just as an experiment. And if it didn’t feel right, we’d stop.”